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bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 06:27 PM

I'm 13 and I want a boyfriend because I want to kiss him in the rain and tell him everything but when I'm with the lads I like the think of me as "one of the guys" so I don't know how to get a boyfriend.

ScottGem · Jul 31, 2012, 06:30 PM

First, will your parents permit you to have a boyfriend? You need to talk to your parents about when you can start with boys.

Second. Try not to grow up so fast. You are being influenced by the media who make it seem that romance is so great. A romantic relationship is nice, but you really need to be more mature to understand and appreciate it.

You are still a child, enjoy it.

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 06:38 PM

My parents are fine with it

I have to grow up I don't have time to be a kid in my family

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2012, 06:42 PM

The really, really smart thing to do right now until these lads mature a bit more (maybe get to be 16 or 17 or even older--and you grow up more too) is to be friends with them. Find out what they like to eat and what sports they like and what about cars and girls too. Be sure you can throw a ball the right way (not "like a girl") and be able to kick a soccer ball around in a good way for your team and know how to change the oil in a car and how to take apart a carburetor. Learn how to cook and bake things that boys like to eat--pizza and brownies and cookies and BBQ. Ask your mates to teach you stuff. They will be happy to do it, and it will make them feel important.

Then, by the time you are old enough to date and you have your parents' blessing for it, you will be in such a good situation with everything you know about how to connect with and relate to boys. That's what I did when I was your age, and once I started to date, I never had any problems getting a date or having boyfriends. The boys loved me because they knew I knew them inside and out, so they were very comfortable with me.

Sssssh, this is our secret. Don't tell your mates what I said.

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 06:47 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

The really, really smart thing to do right now until these lads mature a bit more (maybe get to be 16 or 17 or even older--and you grow up more too) is to be friends with them. Find out what they like to eat and what sports they like and what about cars and girls too. Be sure you can throw a ball the right way (not "like a girl") and be able to kick a soccer ball around in a good way for your team and know how to change the oil in a car and how to take apart a carburetor. Learn how to cook and bake things that boys like to eat--pizza and brownies and cookies and BBQ. Ask your mates to teach you stuff. They will be happy to do it, and it will make them feel important.

Then, by the time you are old enough to date and you have your parents' blessing for it, you will be in such a good situation with everything you know about how to connect with and relate to boys. That's what I did when I was your age, and once I started to date, I never had any problems getting a date or having boyfriends. The boys loved me because they knew I knew them inside and out, so they were very comfortable with me.

Sssssh, this is our secret. Don't tell your mates what I said.

Thanks for your advice but I know everything about these lads and like I have shifted them but they still don't like me in the way I like them

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2012, 06:51 PM

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

Thanks for your advice but I know everything about these lads and like I have shifted them but they still don't like me in the way I like them

You missed my point. You have these lads as your trainers. You won't necessarily date them later. And they are very immature right now and don't want to get into emotional stuff. Girls mature faster than boys, and they don't catch up with girls until the 20s.

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 06:58 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

You missed my point. You have these lads as your trainers. You won't necessarily date them later. And they are very immature right now and don't want to get into emotional stuff. Girls mature faster than boys, and they don't catch up with girls until the 20s.

OK but do you have any advice on how to get a boyfriend when I'm 13 because I still want one
I was recently dumped and I'm ready for a new boyfriend

ScottGem · Jul 31, 2012, 07:02 PM

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

I have to grow up I don't have time to be a kid in my family

I haven't a clue what that means. But it makes me sad for you.

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2012, 07:02 PM

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

ok but do u have any advice on how to get a boyfriend when I'm 13 coz I still want one
I was recently dumped and I'm ready for a new boyfriend

That is what is going to happen at your age--boyfriend after boyfriend will dump you because guys your age don't know how to be a good boyfriend. There's not much chance of having a steady boyfriend until you are older, maybe in your late teens.

Why do you want a boyfriend now and get dumped all the time?

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 07:05 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

That is what is going to happen at your age--boyfriend after boyfriend will dump you because guys your age don't know how to be a good boyfriend. There's not much chance of having a steady boyfriend until you are older, maybe in your late teens.

Why do you want a boyfriend now and get dumped all the time?

Well I don't date lads my age and I don't always get dumped

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2012, 07:06 PM

So you have a steady boyfriend now?

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 07:07 PM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

I haven't a clue what that means. But it makes me sad for you.

It means I have other siblings so I have to be like a mother to them you know like I feed them I clean them I clean up after them I buy them clothes etc...

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 07:10 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

So you have a steady boyfriend now?

No I was dating a dude for like 2 months but then he decided we were to different so he recently dumped me

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2012, 07:14 PM

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

It means I have other siblings so I have to be like a mother to them ya know like I feed them I clean them I clean up after them I buy them clothes etc...

Buy them clothes? You drive and have money? You're not in school?

Alty · Jul 31, 2012, 07:17 PM

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

well I don't date lads my age and I don't always get dumped

If you don't always get dumped then you're not single now.

How did you meet your last boyfriend?

ScottGem · Jul 31, 2012, 07:17 PM

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

It means I have other siblings so I have to be like a mother to them ya know like I feed them I clean them I clean up after them I buy them clothes etc...

That doesn't mean you have to rush growing up in other areas. In fact it means you should embrace your childhood even more where you can.

Originally Posted by bubblegumxox

No I was dating a dude for like 2 months but then he decided we were to different so he recently dumped me

You weren't "dumped". This is the thing about relationships at your age. They are short termed and ephemeral. They aren't real.

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 07:18 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

Buy them clothes? You drive and have money? You're not in school?

Ha I don't drive... I have a summer job and yea I'm in school but my mam has enough things to worry about than buying clothes for my little siblings so I do it for her

Wondergirl · Jul 31, 2012, 07:19 PM

What kind of summer job?

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 07:20 PM

Originally Posted by Alty

If you don't always get dumped then you're not single now.

How did you meet your last boyfriend?

I was at the lake and he saw me so he came up and started to talk to me

bubblegumxox · Jul 31, 2012, 07:21 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

What kind of summer job?

I help out at the vet and I walk dogs and I work at the yard (car yard)