[landlord advocate]

Don't make any drastic changes. Hang in there, get a job, cut expenses. Always pay more than the minimum on the credit cards. Consolidate your debt and negotiate as low an interest rate as possible. You do not appear mentally or physically capable to make life changing decisions right now. The idea that you are no longer using the credit cards makes me think you are ready to turn this around. Good for you! We haven't even discussed what help your ex-husband may be forced to provide for his child. Maybe there needs to be an increase in child support.

Your mistake, in my opinion, was in paying cash for the house. I would have used a portion of the money as a downpayment on a house and invested the rest to provide an income and act as an emergency fund. You now have what is called a "solid asset" which isn't worth anything unless you sell it or finance it.

[breezmom]

Don't make any drastic changes. Hang in there, get a job, cut expenses. Always pay more than the minimum on the credit cards. Consolidate your debt and negotiate as low an interest rate as possible. You do not appear mentally or physically capable to make life changing decisions right now. The idea that you are no longer using the credit cards makes me think you are ready to turn this around. Good for you! We haven't even discussed what help your ex-husband may be forced to provide for his child. Maybe there needs to be an increase in child support.

Your mistake, in my opinion, was in paying cash for the house. I would have used a portion of the money as a downpayment on a house and invested the rest to provide an income and act as an emergency fund. You now have what is called a "solid asset" which isn't worth anything unless you sell it or finance it.

So can they force me to sell my home?
I cannot make payments on the cards as far as I know, as I have not paid in over 6 months. Even if I did I could not afford what they are asking.
I have tried to get a home equity loan to pay them, but no one will give me one.

My ex husband pays as much as the courts can make him, I cannot get anymore. It is enough that we live on. I am looking for work every day.

[LisaB4657]

No, they cannot force you to sell your home.

Here is a basic summary:

1. They cannot take your home or force you to sell it.
2. They can get a judgment against you.
3. Once they have a judgment it acts as a lien on your property and you cannot sell or finance without paying it off.
4. Once they have a judgment they can attach your bank account and empty it. And each time you put money into it they can take all of it until the judgment is paid off in full.
5. Once they have a judgment they can garnish your paycheck.
6. The amount that you owe them will continue to increase on a ridiculous basis. It will include interest, legal fees and court costs. $40,000 can easily become $80,000 in a very short time.

Here are some suggestions:
1. Keep trying to get a mortgage so that you can pay off the full amount and not have it continue to accrue interest and charges.
2. Find a job asap and then make a payment arrangement with them so that you can stop the interest from accruing and start paying it off.
3. If your child support is direct deposit, or if you have been depositing a check from your ex into your bank account, it might be a good idea to look into making a different arrangement so that money is not exposed.

[breezmom]

No, they cannot force you to sell your home.

Here is a basic summary:

1. They cannot take your home or force you to sell it.
2. They can get a judgment against you.
3. Once they have a judgment it acts as a lien on your property and you cannot sell or finance without paying it off.
4. Once they have a judgment they can attach your bank account and empty it. And each time you put money into it they can take all of it until the judgment is paid off in full.
5. Once they have a judgment they can garnish your paycheck.
6. The amount that you owe them will continue to increase on a ridiculous basis. It will include interest, legal fees and court costs. $40,000 can easily become $80,000 in a very short time.

Here are some suggestions:
1. Keep trying to get a mortgage so that you can pay off the full amount and not have it continue to accrue interest and charges.
2. Find a job asap and then make a payment arrangement with them so that you can stop the interest from accruing and start paying it off.
3. If your child support is direct deposit, or if you have been depositing a check from your ex into your bank account, it might be a good idea to look into making a different arrangement so that money is not exposed.

Thank you very much. How can they clean out bank accounts? I mean how can people live if they can take everything?
My child support is direct deposit from the State of California.

[LisaB4657]

Once they have a judgment they can apply for an order to attach any bank account that has your name on it and then take everything out of that account. If you have any joint bank accounts with other people such as a parent, sibling or friend then they can also attach those accounts and clean them out as well. That is why it is so important for you to work something out with them before they get a judgment against you.

[breezmom]

Once they have a judgment they can apply for an order to attach any bank account that has your name on it and then take everything out of that account. If you have any joint bank accounts with other people such as a parent, sibling or friend then they can also attach those accounts and clean them out as well. That is why it is so important for you to work something out with them before they get a judgment against you.

I totally understand and wish I could. But right now I have nothing to work out with them as I have no money. I will get a fairly large inheritance and will pay them when I get it, but that could not be for years and years. Who knows.
I just feel lost and scared.

[LisaB4657]

I understand that you're willing to pay them when you can but I think you're missing a very important point: the longer you wait to try and work something out with them, the worse it will be. And I mean MUCH worse.

Keep calling different lenders. In the meantime take the first job you can find. Then call the cc company, tell them that you finally got a job and you want to start paying them. This way you take control. Being in control makes "lost and scared" disappear. :)

[breezmom]

I understand that you're willing to pay them when you can but I think you're missing a very important point: the longer you wait to try and work something out with them, the worse it will be. And I mean MUCH worse.

Keep calling different lenders. In the meantime take the first job you can find. Then call the cc company, tell them that you finally got a job and you want to start paying them. This way you take control. Being in control makes "lost and scared" disappear. :)

Will they accept payments even though they are not minimum payments?
Thank you so much.

[LisaB4657]

I'm sure they'll take whatever money you will give them but I'm not sure if giving them less than the minimum will stop them from getting a judgment. There are other experts on this site who are more experienced in judgments and collections. Try sending a PM to Mr. Yet to get his opinion. Also, hopefully ScottGem, excon and FrChuck will chime in with their opinions.

[excon]

Hello again, breez:

LisaB (an attorney) makes my point. You have a freight train boring down on you. True, they can't take your house. But if they can drain you of ALL your equity, that's pretty much the same thing.

Yes, my solution is radical, creative and eminently doable. The point is, you MUST do something radical. Paying off the credit cards is a great idea. But you went into debt living a California lifestyle. I doubt you can pay it back with North Carolina wages. Even if you get two jobs and collect cans on the side, the maximum income you'll make will probably be less than your minimum payment - and you'll have nothing left over to buy groceries.

A first mortgage would be ideal... Please don't wait.

excon

[ScottGem]

Thank you very much. How can they clean out bank accounts? I mean how can people live if they can take everything?
My child support is direct deposit from the State of California.

You are missing a point here. They didn't force the charge cards on you. They didn't force you to use them. You incurred the debt. They are in the business of money for a profit. If people don't pay they have to take steps to recover what they loaned. How can THEY live if people don't pay them back?

If they get a judgement against you they WILL attach your bank account. Can you change the direct deposit? If not, then you should be at the bank as soon as you know the payment has been despoited withdrawing the money.

And do what has been recommended, get a job and get an equity loan and pay off the debt.

[breezmom]

Hello again, breez:

Scott is absolutely correct. You CAN find an equity loan given that you own your property free and clear.

You need to look for an unconventional lender. You may only get a mortgage for up to half your home's value, and the interest will be high. But it will cover your debt. Plus, you'll convert NON tax deductible interest into deductible interest.

Look harder. Look in the RE loan section of your newspaper. Ask all those who denied you. Shop well... What you seek IS out there.

excon

Believe me I would love to. But I don't even work.

[mr.yet]

You need to make a decision,about your problem. If you put nay money in the bank they will find it and garnish it.

You own a home free of any mortgage, why not sell it and pay off all you debts, this would give you peace of mind and you can start over without any thing hanging over you.

The longer you wait the harder it will be to settle all these accounts. If you sell the home you can call all the creditor and ask them what they would take to settle their accounts, since you don't have the property anymore there will be nothing for them to lien and may opt to settle for less than owed.

Once you decide what you want to do you will relax and have peace of mind.

Or you can try to fight them, but this too is no the way the settle this matter.

This will be you choice and you must decide what you want to do.

[breezmom]

You need to make a decision,about your problem. if you put nay money in the bank they will find it and garnish it.

You own a home free of any mortgage, why not sell it and pay off all you debts, this would give you peace of mind and you can start over without any thing hanging over you.

The longer you wait the harder it will be to settle all these accounts. If you sell the home you can call all the creditor and ask them what they would take to settle their accounts, since you dont have the property anymore there will be nothing for them to lien and may opt to settle for less than owed.

Once you decide what you want to do you will relax and have peace of mind.

Or you can try to fight them, but this too is no the way the settle this matter.

This will be you choice and you must decide what you want to do.

I would love to be able to pay them, but I also cannot be homeless.
I am all alone. I have no family, no husband and just moved to a new state and have no great friends either. I could not sell it, pay them and have enough to live. It just would not work.