[baby1234]

I'm 22 and still a virgin, it has to do with my religion but also a personal choice as well. I haven't really dated or done anything sexual, other than kissing. I was talking to this one guy, the first night he met me we exchanged numbers, the next day he started talking dirty to me. I just went with it. Then out of nowhere he just stopped talking to me, and kind ignored me. I met him through my cousin and it seemed anytime he would see her he would then think of me and then decide to text me, and it always happened to be at night, never in the day. We were on the phone the other day and all he wanted was dirty talk. I went with it again, but I felt like I should let him know I was a virgin and all that, so I did, and he just said he knew it. Then and I quote, said "You know what this means right?" I said "What?" he said "we can't do anything because I don't do thing with girls that never done anything before." Then he started to talk dirty again, I told him we couldn't because he didn't do stuff like that with 'virgins', then he hung up. I feel like maybe something is wrong with me. I'm normally a level headed person and am the one everyone goes to for advice, but when it comes to me I am like a dead weight. I feel like all common sense has went out the window. Should I lie about being a virgin next time? Was the only reason he was talking to me was for sex? I don't really know. The sad thing is I really like this guy, and I can't stop thinking about him.

[Cat1864]

I think you found out what he really wanted and it wasn't a relationship.

How much do you actually know about him? Did you talk about other things than sex? Did you ever talk about going out or doing things in person?

No, you shouldn't lie about being a virgin, but you also don't have to say anything about it until you are ready. His reaction is that of someone who isn't looking to build a relationship. He is looking for a playmate or phone sex buddy. I somehow don't get the impression that you would like to be thought of as the equivalent of a free phone sex operator, would you?

I think you need to lose his phone number and don't take his calls (if he tries to contact you again.) You may 'like' him. He may be great person. I do think you both are looking for different things at this stage of your lives.

[smoothy]

I'm a guy... he was after sex, and a girlfriend... but clearly NOT looking for a wife any time soon.

Count your blessings this happened this quick. You don't have anything really invested here yet.

By all means you should do what you think is right for you... and acknowledge the fact some guys are going to walk out as a result. And it could be for reasons other than sex as well. When the person is right... you won't have these issues. Heck even if you did put out they might still walk away at some point anyway, so don't think that is any way to hang on to anyone either.. because it doesn't work.

You do it when its right for you (and not before then)... because until that wedding ring is on the hand... there isn't any obligation.

[Fr_Chuck]

You clarified where he was at. He was most likely expecting sex on the second or third date, many guys do. Many guys are not wanting a long term relationship merely a sex partner.

[yeshua_is_love]

YOu should definitely NOT lie about being a virgin. Once your sexually active its almost like a whole different world, and more complicated.

I praise you for keeping your virginity. It is something precious that is not to be thrown away.

He clearly just wanted sex from you. You will find many guys like this, and they will leave when they find out that you're a virgin.. but this is a good thing because you don't want those kind of people.

And so a guy that stays with you without expecting sex until marriage is definitely worth your time, and they are out there. There are dating sites for virgins as well. That would be your best bet is to look for another virgin.