[tmckinnon]

I'm a man but my lady is insensitive at times. She feels it's fine to say what's on her mind whenever at any time. Also she can be rude at times. I've told her but she doesn't see anything wrong with some of what she does. She says she would rather say it now then wait. If we are at a restaurant together she has no problem with talking on the phone or e-mailing on the blackberry for minutes at a time while I'm just sitting there. I find that rude. Also during sex once she mentioned other people or how they were more excited. How do you deal with a person like that? I love her and I'm trying to deal with this issue.

[talaniman]

You said it, as you have to deal with the issues she brings, Other wise you find some one more to your liking.

[RubyPitbull]

Talaniman is right.

You asked us how to deal with this issue because you love her and, I am assuming that you want to try to figure out how to handle her actions because you do not want to end the relationship. You have told this woman how you feel about her insensitivity and rudeness toward you. She has told you that she sees nothing wrong with her actions and continues to be the way she is.

Frankly, this is not quite the basis for a mutually respectful and loving relationship and it is going to be very hard for you to make this work if she isn't willing to adjust her attitude. She needs to recognize that you are hurt and bothered by this and she needs to make some attempt to be more considerate. I would suggest having a long serious discussion with her and lay all your cards on the table. If you have already done this, do it again, because this seems to be causing you a great deal of distress and you aren't at a point where you are ready to give up. If after speaking with her again, she continues to be insensitive to your feelings, refuses to adjust her habits, and this continues to be a source of great distress to you, then you must decide if you want to live like this or not. Only you can make that decision.

At the end of the day, if you decide that you want to continue this relationship then, the only thing you can do is to turn a blind eye and a deaf ear to her rudeness and insensitivities toward you. There is no other constructive advice we can give you other than to give her a taste of her own medicine and behave in the same rude manner toward her. You could try that. It might get through to her. It probably won't. Personally, I have always felt that it is a rather childish way to approach a problem between two adults.

The bottom line here is, if you cannot ignore it and her actions continue to hurt your feelings, then you have a hard choice to make. Either you stay and just put up with it, or you leave and find someone else who is worthy of you. Sometimes, loving someone is just not enough to form the basis for a good and lasting relationship. I am in complete agreement with you that the things she does that you have described here are extremely rude. Why wouldn't you want to find someone who has the same level of consideration for you, as you do for them?