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    maikiela's Avatar
    maikiela Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jan 18, 2012, 01:36 AM
    My fiancé doesn't want to spend too much on our wedding
    This is my dilemma. My fiancé and I are getting married this year. He said he doesn't want to spend too much money on the wedding which I totally agree with. He wants us to decide on a date and then make an announcement to our families and maybe some friends. His idea is to have the wedding in a church (which cost about $300-$600 and because that's what my mother wants) and then invite people to come to the wedding but not feed them. He kept saying that a wedding is not about spending money or feeding people but to share our moment of becoming husband and wife. So I told him then if that's the case I would rather have the wedding at city hall and just have our immediate family come and then take them out (which he kind of resisted). I guess I'm okay with it but it does bother me that I can not share my special day with my extended family. I think he's assuming he'll pay for this himself which I would never ask him to do. It's equal share.

    So I've been thinking about this I came up with this solution: we would split the church cost and licenses but I'll pay for the reception so that I can have both our families there. There's a total of 9 people in his family (immediate) who would come to where we currently live and I have 13 (immediate). If I include my extended family and assuming they will all to, have a total of 65-70 people in the reception.

    Do you think this is acceptable? I don't know if he'll get offended but I really want everyone flow to both us to be there and I want to show my gratitude by feeding them. I don't need the decorations, the dress and anything else.
    JudyKayTee's Avatar
    JudyKayTee Posts: 46,503, Reputation: 4600
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    #2

    Jan 19, 2012, 07:47 AM
    It's your wedding, too, not just his. You can get married in a Church without all the trappings - you simply go and repeat your vows in front of a clergyperson inside a Church.

    If you are "assuming" what he thinks and are intending to marry this person you really both need to sit down and talk and communicate and understand each other. If you don't talk about this issue how do you plan to handle the routine problems that occur in a marriage?

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