[effy25]

All threads merged about effy25's love life.


All I ever wanted was to be with this guy, but, he is not what I expected. He is very emotional and insecure. He is sweet but slightly irritating. He tries to control me and gets mad when I talk to or hang out with other people, no matter which gender, it is not fair that I am not going to a major university next year because he doesn't want me to leave but at the same time I don't want to hurt him.

His parents are separated and he lives with his mean grandparents who are constantly telling him how bad I am but they don't know me. They put ideas in his head that I cheat on him and that is not true but he still believes them. When I come close to dumping him just to get it over with he cries and makes me feel bad. He does not trust me because I dated him once freshman year and broke up with him. I earned his trust for a whole year and he treated me like ****, made me feel like I didn't deserve him and now that I am actually realizing I don't need him he starts to act like every fight we have is my fault because I am so awful.

I am sick of the constant comments on my flirtatious PAST with other guys but he just says he is joking. He cries every argument we have so I never break up with him. But I love him and I know I'd be sad without him sometimes. I just am tired of him needing constant attention. I want to be his girlfriend not his babysitter. I can't even have sex because I am suddenly unattracted to him.. What do I do?

[olive777]

I also dated someone like this when I was 15. He would have major mood swings and totally cry when we had a fight. It was all about him and not about me. He would do crazy things like say, I'm going to jump out your window if you don't do this or that. It was totally emotionally draining and left me feeling so helpless and in a weird way obsessed with him. All I can say is that as a woman we easily get attached to people and become easily insecure. Thinking things like he's the only one for me and so on. But After months of dating this guy and being totally emotionally abused I finally managed to brake things off. It was really hard but for the better. The thing you have to know is that he's not the only guy in this world and you are so young and have plenty of time to meet someone who honors you and loves you and accepts you the way you are. You need to become happy with YOU as a person and not just want to fill a void with this guy. I'm so glad that I broke it off with this guy because now I'm happily married to an amazing man who loves me and supports me! A REAL MAN! Not a little wimpy insecure boy. Try to just see life in a bigger picture and not only right this momment because then you'll see that this guy isn't worth your time. It's not your job to put up with his problems and his emotional abuse. You need to become stronger in you and deserve an honorable man! And they are out there... and they are worth the wait! Hope this helps! Be blessed! :)

[effy25]

Ive just always imagined myself with a strong, athletic, smart, college graduate guy who makes me melt. Im just worried that what I fought so hard for (him) was all because I didn't want him to be with anyone else. I can't stand the idea of being without him because he is super nice when he wants to be and he loves me sooo much. I just don't want to ruin my only chance, or make a mistake. I am just tired of the same fight, same dates, same kiss, same sex, same bore.

[talaniman]

End this dysfunctional, unhealthy relationship, and go to the university of your dreams.

[Homegirl 50]

This relationship is way crazy,
Get out of it! Relationships should not be this complicated

[effy25]

Thanks guys

[effy25]

All threads merged about effy25's love life.


Last night I had a amazing dream and I don't know why I dreamed it. In the dream I met this guy and he was really cute and sweet and I really liked him, he asked me to his school dance and I said yes and at one point we made our relationship official and he was just like my dream guy. But all along I had a boyfriend, who I have in real life, and I truly do love him but in my dream I was with my boyfriend texting the other guy the whole time. My boyfriend had been altered quite a bit as well, he was rich and owned all this property and in reality he's not like poor but not rich but in my dream I couldn't choose between the new amazing guy with the awesome family and super great looks or the one I love.

Well OK so I have had dreams like that before and I know that it represents what you want reality to be but this time I woke up actually wanting to have the option to choose and for some reason I may have chose the new guy. Ughh! But if you read my other post about my boyfriend that may give you more insight as to why I dreamed this. Please help.

[mmresd]

Your dream guy will always appear in your dreams... But dreams are just dreams, just a spot in your imagination. Enjoy them, don't let them get to you, they mean nothing.

[Letsmakelove]

It could be a sign that you're not meant to be with you're true life boyfriend that happened to me once and 1or 2 weeks later we broke up from getting in a fight and it happened again after two other guys passed by so good luck

[talaniman]

No insights needed. You are unhappy with your love, and want a better boyfriend.

[effy25]

Thank you! We'll see how it goes

[effy25]

All threads merged about effy25's love life.


Ok so last weekend I broke up with my long term boyfriend. We were together for over a year and a half. He and I just aren't happy and I made the decision when I was calm and prepared. He's been trying to persuade me to go back to him but I was just not in love and wasn't happy. He is very overly obsessive and controlling. We fought over everything, he was sometimes violent he scared me sometimes. I felt stuck with him because of our history together but I couldn't do it any longer.

So the truth is the night before we broke up I made out with another guy and that was my determining factor. Its not that I wanted this other guy but it was in the moment and I realized if I was happy with my boyfriend then I wouldn't have allowed myself to kiss the guy. But I did stop before we went any further because I did feel bad but that's not point. I felt awful and broke up with him. I took full blame.

And the guy I cheated on does like me, I think I was only physically intrigued by him. So I've had this crush on a completely different guy in my class at school for a while but I never wanted to tell him because of my ex. I wanted to be faithful to my ex. My life has been hell for the past week because of me breaking up with my boyfriend. He's a good guy but I was no longer attracted to him in a physical or emotional way so I couldn't string him along any more. Everyone hates me.

Ok so the thing I'm trying to get advice on is Prom. It is in less than five weeks and I need a date so we have time too coordinate. I know this guy in my class likes me so would it be completely insensitive to agree to go with him because of how upset my ex is. Am I a total jerk. What do I do because nobody I know is OK with my decision and everyone thinks I'm a *****. Ugh please help.

[talaniman]

Forget the ex, and the haters, if a guy asks and you like him, then go!