[CamerinaLn]

I had sex the other day, and my boyfriend said the condom broke. I checked the condom and it was ripped on the tip of it. I saw a little bit *** or white stuff on the edges of the condom. Please help me ! I'm 16 and scared! What should I do without letting my parent know?

[JudyKayTee]

You can either get the "abortion pill" from a Doctor (I have no idea how long ago the "other day" was) OR wait it out and see if you get your period.

Do your parents know you are sexually active?

[CamerinaLn]

I had Sex 2 Days ago. And My parents do not know I'm sexual active.

[JudyKayTee]

I am reading that you can buy the "abortion pill" without a prescription if you are over 17. I have no idea if that is true or not, if you could get it from Planned Parenthood, if it's too late - I can't tell from what I've read.

We have an RN who really knows her stuff as well as a childbirth coach - Let me ask them to join us - sometimes they work nights so it might take a while.

In the meantime, try to remain calm (and I know it's difficult). You probably don't want to - or don't think you can - discuss this with your parents. I'm a step parent and if my step daughter came to me and the choice was having sex and depending on condoms OR telling me she is sexually active and having HER use birth control, I'd choose the latter. Your parents will probably be upset and perhaps angry but, hopefully, they were once your age and will understand.

Let's see if I can get some sound medical advice for you. I'll come back later to see if anyone has answered.

Okay?

[Fr_Chuck]

If it has been less than 72 hours, the morning after pill is a choice, ( it will have less effect the longer you wait)

But at this point, you have to just wait till it is time for your next period and if you miss it take a pregnancy test.

Of course remember that condoms are not 100 percent at best. They have a 10 percent or so failure rate.

You need to discuss with your parents about getting on birth control pills for added protection if you are going to be sexually active.

[J_9]

Unfortunately at this point there is little you can do aside from wait for your next period to come. Take this as a lesson. If you aren't ready to be a mother, use more than one form of protection if you plan on continuing intercourse.

As a mother of an 18 year old daughter myself, I'd be much more relieved if she came to me asking for help getting birth control rather than coming to me telling me she is pregnant.

[ScottGem]

It amazes me how many teenage girls post here after they missed a period or the condom broke or some other, similar accident. And now they are scared they are pregnant.

The time to be scared is BEFORE you engage in risky behavior. That's the purpose of fear, to help prevent taking risks.

I know you didn't come here for a lecture, but unfortunately there is not much else we can do for you at this point. We can hope that you are not pregnant. We can hope even more that if you aren't you learned from this experience and will take less risks.

[Mini_Her]

ScottGem, she has every right to be "Scared" of being pregnant. She used a condom, which means she attempted to prevent pregnancy. Unfortunately the condom broke. That happened to me before, and it has happened to many others. Condoms break. At least those people tried to protect themselves, some have unprotected sex than get upset when they find out they're pregnant.

[ScottGem]

ScottGem, she has every right to be "Scared" of being pregnant. She used a condom, which means she attempted to prevent pregnancy. Unfortunately the condom broke. That happened to me before, and it has happened to many others. Condoms break. At least those people tried to protect themselves, some have unprotected sex than get upset when they find out they're pregnant.

And where did I say she doesn't have a right to be scared? And yes condoms DO break. Which is why there are not a 100% effective method of birth control. And yes it is better that she tried to protect herself then have unprotected sex.

But you are missing the point. Engaging in sexual intercourse risks pregnancy. That is a fact. No matter what form of protection you use, when you engage in sexual intercourse you risk having a baby. So, if becoming pregnant scares you, then DON'T TAKE THE RISK! Is that hard to understand?

[Mini_Her]

And where did I say she doesn't have a right to be scared? And yes condoms DO break. Which is why there are not a 100% effective method of birth control. And yes it is better that she tried to protect herself then have unprotected sex.

But you are missing the point. Engaging in sexual intercourse risks pregnancy. That is a fact. No matter what form of protection you use, when you engage in sexual intercourse you risk having a baby. So, if becoming pregnant scares you, then DON'T TAKE THE RISK! Is that hard to understand?

I want you to name ONE human, regardless of age, who would actually live their life without ever taking that risk. It's not just teens, but adults also use condoms to prevent pregnancy. It's natural, some folks have high sex drives! But they don't want a baby.

[J_9]

I want you to name ONE human, regardless of age, who would actually live their life without ever taking that risk.

I am one of those humans. I did not engage in intercourse until married and even then I used 2 forms of birth control. Guess what happened... I got pregnant. Not once, but twice.

[JudyKayTee]

I want you to name ONE human, regardless of age, who would actually live their life without ever taking that risk. It's not just teens, but adults also use condoms to prevent pregnancy. It's natural, some folks have high sex drives! But they don't want a baby.

I'm that person - I had an education to finish, a career to start. I took NO chances, I made certain I was protected. I didn't trust a partner to protect me. Did I insist on condoms because of STD's? Yes.

Did I use birth control for myself? Yes. It had nothing to do with a high sex drive and everything to do with not being careless or stupid.

So, yes, Scott can specifically name me.

[Fr_Chuck]

I want you to name ONE human, regardless of age, who would actually live their life without ever taking that risk. It's not just teens, but adults also use condoms to prevent pregnancy. It's natural, some folks have high sex drives! But they don't want a baby.

Many people never take this risk, first the majority of teens don't have sex till they are at least out of high school and old enough and mature enough to start work and support a child.

Many people still wait till marriage to have sex.

Most of those that practice sex get on birth control and do a condom also.

As you noted, condoms are far from safe, you knew many people who talk about their condoms breaking, and they have other failures besides that. As used the average failure rate is about 10 percent failure.

A one in ten chance is very bad odds.

But just because there are "MANY" people who make poor choices to use a condom alone. And make poor choices to have sex at too earlier age, and make poor choices of even who they have sex with. IT does not mean they can't be scared, they should be. But we hope others may be scared before they have sex. Not after.

[ScottGem]

I'll make that three. I did not have sexual intercourse until I was married. And then after marriage, yes I did use birth control, but I was prepared to have a child if it didn't work.

Some people also have high levels of self control. You would be very surprised at how high the percentages are of people who don't engage in sexual intercourse, even with highly effective methods of birth control, because they do not want to risk pregnancy. I'm not saying they represent a majority. Clearly they don't, especially among adults. But there are plenty of people, even teens, who DO forego sexual intercourse because they do not want to risk pregnancy.

You might decide to do more research before making inane statements.

[JudyKayTee]

I note that MimiMe was pregnant - and presumably has a child - is 25 and has a boyfriend. I'm sure her thinking is colored by her life experiences.

The other thread concerning foster care is closed; however, MimiMe has posted she does not want some of her family members at her funeral due to "deep grudges" so I am assuming that her life experiences colored that other thread, also.

[J_9]

Again, thread closed due to argumentative nature.