[TheMsRudy]

He says we are moving forward to more than friends. He's been hurt by his last two relationships, so he is not ready for one. I like him a lot, and this would be my first relationship. Should I wait for him to be ready or move on to bigger and better things?

[adviceishere]

Tell him you want to discuss having a relationship in the near future and give him a couple of months. It wasn't you that hurt him in the past so why should you be the one losing out on something possibly better?

[DoulaLC]

Hi TheMsRudy,

It depends on how much do you feel for him. Do you want to take the time to get to know him better? Would you not be willing to take things slowly and just focus on enjoying the time you spend together?

If you are wanting to be in a more committed relationship, or you don't feel enough of a connection is there, or that he is worth the wait, perhaps you should move on.

If you really like this guy, enjoy doing things together and getting to know each other, than consider sticking it out a bit longer and see where it might lead.

No need to rush things if you think there is a good possibility of something developing later on, and who knows, bigger and better might be just ahead with this guy.

Decide how you feel, maybe give yourself a time frame to review the relationship again at a later time and see if anything has changed.

Also, there is no reason why you can't date other people as well if this is not an exclusive relationship.

[geminichick]

If he's not ready, we don't know when he will be ready for a relationship. Especially when he has been hurt. It will take him time to heal and may have trust issues with women. The thing is do you really want to wait for this guy, which could be forever, or would you like to move on and be with a guy who is ready for a relationship?

[Fr_Chuck]

Some details

How old are the two of you,
How long was he out of the "old" relationship before you and he got involved.
How long have the two of you been together.

I had one girlfriend once who started talking marriage on second date and did not understand why I was not ready to talk about it.

[Jake2008]

The thing is, you are the rabbit, and he is the turtle. While you cross the finish line, and are ready to go hike up a mountain, he is plodding along, trying to avoid the pot holes, transport trucks, coyotes, and other dangers.

He moves at a snail's pace, figuring out if he should move a little faster, take a little risk, put his muscular little legs into second gear... but alas, other rabbits have treated him badly in the past, and he'd just as soon keep a slow pace, until the cows come home.

In which case, he's planning his race to be in a nice warm barn, alone, before getting trampled.

So, the message is, you can win the race- maybe- but, is it worth the wait?