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gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 11:01 AM

How can I tell if I am not being scam for marriage. So far I seen her on Video cam several times, Spoke to her on Cell phone dozen of times,sent many photos of her that match her on video cam, She want me to go Ghana to meet her family. She did ask for little money but not much. She want to get married to me and want to come to US to start a family. She say there agent there can do the paper work and she say is easier to do it there than in USA. I did research some info here in USA and does take some time to paper work and money. Is she real or just playing with my heart.

NeedKarma · Nov 14, 2011, 11:07 AM

99% of these are scams. BTW why would you want to marry someone you've never met in real life?

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 11:21 AM

No.. that's why I want to go there to Ghana to see her and she is happy about it... Is this real... If is real I want to go for it but if not I will not go for it and just call occaioally.

NeedKarma · Nov 14, 2011, 11:34 AM

I doubt it's real, sorry. For you to go to Ghana would not involve sending any money to her would it? Tell her that (that you want to visit but not send any money beforehand) and let us know what happens.

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 11:45 AM

Under normal circumstances it would not but in ghana I know times are hard for eveyone so a little money not going to hurt me much as is for food for her... and she really wants me to come down and see her to establish that she is not a fake and she really sincere about she not a fake... what so you think

odinn7 · Nov 14, 2011, 12:32 PM

I think, and I know, that a lot of times scammers will get you to go to them and take your money that way. It's not uncommon for the scammers to get nasty and rob you if they think they can get it out of you that way.

Is she for real? I don't know for sure but I would say chances are that she is not. Would I go there to find out? No way.

NeedKarma · Nov 14, 2011, 12:35 PM

It's unfortunate that the one girl you meet online is from the #1 scamming country for this type of thing: https://www.google.com/search?source...w=1680&bih=897

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 01:39 PM

Are they any real marriage from online chat in Ghana... and what's there story would like to hear about it before I do anything else. Sometimes I feel she is a fake and sometime I feel she is not is 50/50. But how do I know she is not a fake... I see the percentage is against her but when I talk to her and sounds like a young women and don't believe she is a fake based on her tone and the way she speaks to me about us. What do I do about this.

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 01:46 PM

If she wasn't real then why she want me to come down to make sure she is a real person and have real intentions with me if she a fake. At first she did not want me to mention her to my friends and family but now she wants the world to know about us and also she calls me here in the USA at times just to talk to me... Help me out here

Fr_Chuck · Nov 14, 2011, 06:02 PM

Most real marriage are those arranged by people from Ghana here in the US who arrange marriage for family members.
Not that I approve.

But next there are lots of charity work in Ghana, The Church of Christ has a lot of operatoins there. As do most other larger churches.

In your case, the person you are talking to, is the one you are chatting with.

Of course the passport and visa ( visa has to come from the US government though the embassy or though US immigration) but both cost about 300 US dollars, so there is not much cost involved.

It is an interesting nation, and a great place to do a visit, so if you have the money to do so, I would go and see.

Remember the person you are talking to, has the money for internet, video and more.

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 08:21 PM

Thanks for your response and does sound promising... but when she went on video cam was using her friends and now has to go to café to go online, she say is about 1 US dollar for 1 hour use and did use her friends phone camera to take a video of herself. I spoke with today on phone and does not sound like a fake based in her highs and lows in her voice and the way she has respect for me. If a fake a person can tell right away if she is lying but does not seem that way. I believe I have a traditional ghana women but is mix race and a christian women... what is your opinion?

odinn7 · Nov 14, 2011, 08:41 PM

Seriously... how many times can you keep asking us the same question but worded differently?

Honestly, I hope she is real... I really do. From what I know and what I have learned, she is most likely not real.

How did the 2 of you start contacting each other? Was it an email from her out of nowhere? This is often a tip off that you are being scammed.

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 08:50 PM

She not out of nowhere was through a dating website called Filipinocupid.com where we first made contact on there chat and went from there. And think you should not be so negative because there are still good people out there.

odinn7 · Nov 14, 2011, 09:19 PM

I'm not necessarily being negative here... you keep asking for opinions and we gave them to you... but you keep asking for more. So to me, if you keep asking, you have doubts still. It actually sounds to me like you are trying to convince yourself that she is OK. Like you want all of us to tell you that 'sure, she's for real, go for it.'

I do have to wonder how you 'met' a woman from Ghana on a Filipino dating site... but anyway...

Unfortunately, I have trouble believing she is real. I hope I'm wrong because I think you are going to go through with this. I do hope she is real for your sake.

Do us all a favor please... if you do go and meet her, please come back here and tell us how it all went.

Take care.

Fr_Chuck · Nov 14, 2011, 09:50 PM

I have 100's of Ghana friends locally, and it is not uncommon for them to be Christian, so what church locally does she go to,

Humm but how often was she on web cam ? Now she can't be ? There is so much iffy on this, I would say as long as you don't send money but what I am concerned about, she will get you hooked, convinced and then all of a sudden the money will come up. A little at first, food, rent.
30 dollars, 100 dollars. Then all of a sudden, someone is hurt, sick, she does not call for a few days and that friend emails that she has been in a accident and so on.

gil123 · Nov 14, 2011, 11:09 PM

Odinn7... you are right on the most part but her mother is Filipino and father is Ghana. I did ask for your opinion and I thanks you and anyone else for giving it. I have her address and her uncles, I have her phone number, email, sister name, she has send a letter to my house, I have her DOB. If I ever send money again she would have to come up with an ID. I know some things are still Iffy about certain issues but going to see how she react to it.

Fr_chuck.. has been awhile since she been on cam but she say will go on soon again. She say was in a accident but did not send any money said need it for medicine but could not tell me for what and know she not a doctor either. So I said to myself let see now and did not contact her for a week. And now sent no money and she still want to continue with me.

Fr_Chuck · Nov 15, 2011, 06:20 AM

As long as you don't send any money you are OK, It is so hard to tell good from scam, The scam people will keep up the emails for months even a year or so, as long as they think they will get you attached.

What worries me is that the cam stopped, this is why, They use and pay a pretty girl to do the video cams, get you hooked, then grandma or grandpa or a room full of people who do the scams, take over the emails.

Look over the emails, look for changes in grammar, spelling and the such.

gil123 · Nov 15, 2011, 10:51 AM

Chuck... We don't usually email but when she does I see no changes in spelling and grammar. I think the only way to be 100% sure is to go down to Ghana for a visit and I am due a short vacation anyway.One things that put questions marks in my head was when she was in an accident her mother chat with me. The chat grammar started with lots of misspelling but as she went on it started to get better and better as we chatted. Her mother is about 65 and I find it hard for a women to chat on a phone to chat with average speed... She got out and I told her better to talk over phone than do a chat and she was fine with it. I still see good in her even she may a scammer but hope she not... she just went online to chat let me see... Thanks to all for info but haven't decided anything with her yet but I hope I decide soon

NeedKarma · Nov 15, 2011, 11:38 AM

Originally Posted by gil123

I still see good in her even she may a scammer ...

If she is a scammer then she feels absolutely nothing for you but views you as just anoher mark. She (they) are likely juggling several people like you.

Here's our canadian traveller advisory about that area: Ghana Travel Advice and Advisories | Government of Canada

odinn7 · Nov 15, 2011, 03:44 PM

Originally Posted by Fr_Chuck

The scam people will keep up the emails for months even a year or so, as long as they think they will get you attached.

That's the truth. I have strung plenty of them along for well over 6 months in their hopes that they would get a big pay off. I had one go for nearly a year until I got tired of it. Dating scammers, lotto scammers, found money scammers... they're all the same... Greedy. They'll hang on as long as they think they can get a pay off.