[Depressed in MO]

It's just about my lingering situation since I've started coming on here that I'm still trying to "fix".


Kids' dad and I broke up about 4-5 months ago, he left us for another woman. This is the same guy I've been back and forth with for the past 12 + years. I really need help.

He is trying once again to get back together with me and do right by us (the kids and I) and blah blah blah. Those of you who know me on here know what blah blah blah means...

I do not want to be with this man, I'm actually seeing someone else and very happy. So it should be easy to say this to him right? Nope. He knows I'm with someone but that is not stopping him.

I guess I'm just asking advice on how to let him down easy so he doesn't get pissed and start talking trash to me and threatening me-everytime he does that, it makes me second-guess every decision I've ever made without him.

I know I'm a grown woman and I need to stand my ground on my own-which I'm willing to do-I just need a little help from my friends on this one...

This guy is very manipulative-it's just that we have the little ones together. He will make me me feel responsible for him not seeing them because I won't take him back-I know he will. He is going to try and hurt me anyway he can think of. I know I'm jumping around here so I hope I'm making sense-there's just so much.

I plan on telling him this evening that no matter what he says or does-he has done what he has done and I will never take him back again no matter what.

How does someone tell somebody else that? Especially when you once loved that person so unconditionally. Ugh... I just want to get this over with. He has no idea what's coming and I have no idea how I'm going to dish it over to him...

[mmresd]

Either together or apart, he is still the father, and whatever decision you make, make it for yourself, is time to stop his controlling and manipulative ways from affecting you. You need to gather the courage to say enough is enough and redo your life with someone who creates happiness, not relive the past with someone who you obviously dread. He has made his choices about leaving and coming back like a dog with his tail between his legs, is it time to tell the dog to leave for good and to welcome this new chapter in your life.

[talaniman]

Hey DMO, I know its hard, but you have a plan, just do it. Just curious, if you have ever taken him to court for child support, and visitations?

That may make him think. You certainly should look into it. Don't worry about what he says about you, or what he will do. Doesn't matter because YOU are the boss, and YOU should get what YOU want. Not give him what he wants. His lies mean nothing, nor should they be listened to.

Enough letting him manipulate you.

[Depressed in MO]

Thanks guys! This whole ordeal is making me sick. It seems like every time I get happy in my life without him, he tries to come back in. I just wish he would leave me alone...

Tal-no I have not taken him to court for child support... I'm just too afraid at this point of what he will do. As far as custody goes, that is in the works...

[vanheart]

"he left us for another woman"
That's that. Now its about you & your kids.

He had his chance.

"I do not want to be with this man, I'm actually seeing someone else and very happy"

There you go. Hope you didn't rebound, that's all.

Like Tal said, Take him to court.

[Depressed in MO]

"he left us for another woman"
Thats that. Now its about you & your kids.

He had his chance.

"I do not want to be with this man, I'm actually seeing someone else and very happy"

There you go. Hope you didnt rebound, thats all.

Like Tal said, Take him to court.

:confused:... hope I didn't rebound either... regardless, I'm still trying to not get sucked in again with someone stupid