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Confused333 · Aug 11, 2011, 08:40 AM

Well it's a drug and Alcohol awareness center, where there are employed counselors but they bill to medical and they get their salaries through the provider... If you get a DUI you can go there for counseling and pay for the service. Cash/Medical. But over all it's a non-profit.

AK lawyer · Aug 11, 2011, 09:24 AM

Originally Posted by ScottGem

...
You do have rights to his salary and marital assets, but not to the NPC's assets.

Unless it can be established that the NPC is a sham, and that it's really just a cover to hide the property of the husband and his family.

Confused333 · Aug 11, 2011, 12:34 PM

I know Im doing the right thing thank you for all the advice and input Thank you for the support but please let me know if Im going crazy I have been crying myself to sleep every night for the past 3 days I have been having nightmares about this divorce, am I going crazy. My heart is aching wondering what happened to 7 years.

Confused333 · Aug 11, 2011, 03:59 PM

Thank you for the advice I will let my attorney try to figure out the best solution. I don't want him to be in trouble with IRS just what's fair for my family ( My SON and me)

twinkiedooter · Aug 11, 2011, 04:14 PM

Originally Posted by Confused333

Thank you for the advice I will let my attorney try to figure out the best solution. I don't wnat him to be in trouble with IRS just whats fair for my family ( My SON and me)

If you let him continue like this and it is found out that he and his family are essentially crooks, then you will be guilty of aiding and abeting this criminal enterprise misusing public funds. Why NOT turn him and his family into the IRS? They are such nasty, creepy, spoiled rotten people and actually deserve none of their illgotten gains. They sound like they are happily helping themselves to money that they are not legitimately earning. The paid under the table is one glaring example.

You seem so reluctant to have them open to any kind of public inspection or scrutiny. Stop protecting them, they certainly are against you and your child.

ScottGem · Aug 11, 2011, 04:18 PM

Before you start thinking about turning him in to the IRS, you need to know exactly what is going on. I'm not in the least convinced that there is something shady going on. I think you don't really know the details about the organization your husband works for and you need to understand it better before you do anything else.

Confused333 · Aug 11, 2011, 04:25 PM

I know Im doing the right thing thank you for all the advice and input Thank you for the support but please let me know if Im going crazy I have been crying myself to sleep every night for the past 3 days I have been having nightmares about this divorce, am I going crazy. My heart is aching wondering what happened to 7 years.
I will find out everything the TRUTH in regards to the business.

ScottGem · Aug 11, 2011, 04:53 PM

Divorce is a traumatic circumstance. No you aren't going crazy, but it might help if you think about some counseling.

Confused333 · Aug 15, 2011, 10:49 AM

My husband wants split custody just to hurt me, he I gave him an option of every other weekend and one night every week during the week, I am also not wanting him to be away from our 4year old son, I want him at all activities that our child may have. He says he wants 3 extra nights during the weeks he doesn't have our son over a weekend. Is this possible he said he will fight me.

excon · Aug 15, 2011, 11:56 AM

Originally Posted by Confused333

So technically they can hide everything.... hmmm. Do I have any rights? without getting them in trouble with IRS?

Hello C:

Technically, they are violating the law... However, it appears that the corporation is NOT non profit, and you ARE entitled to a share. I understand that you don't want to snitch them off. But, you're a victim here. They're ripping YOU and YOUR SON off. I don't know WHY you want them to get away with it.

excon

PS> Have you ever heard the refrain, "keep your friends close, but keep your enemies closer"? This is exactly WHY.

Confused333 · Aug 15, 2011, 03:24 PM

My husband wants split custody just to hurt me, he I gave him an option of every other weekend and one night every week during the week, I am also not wanting him to be away from our 4year old son, I want him at all activities that our child may have. He says he wants 3 extra nights during the weeks he doesn't have our son over a weekend. Is this possible he said he will fight me.
He knows Im not as financially capable as he is ( he makes 3 times as much as I do) I told him that its going to traumatize our child to be here one day there another... He is unreasonable... Mind you, for the past 4 years my Son has only been away from for a week all together. I am always primary

AK lawyer · Aug 15, 2011, 03:42 PM

Originally Posted by Confused333

... I am also not wanting him to be away from our 4year old son, I want him at all activities that our child may have. ...

You can agree that your soon-to-be ex-husband will have specific visitation, but you can't force him to exercise it.

Originally Posted by Confused333

... He says he wants 3 extra nights during the weeks he doesn't have our son over a weekend. Is this possible ...

Sure. If the two of you agree to it that is likely what the judge will order.

Originally Posted by Confused333

... he said he will fight me.
He knows Im not as financially capable as he is ( he makes 3 times as much as I do) ...

In some states you can ask the court to order him to pay some of all of your attorney fees. Look into it.

Confused333 · Aug 15, 2011, 03:48 PM

I live in CA, My attorney has asked for him to pay my fees, he will not agree to it. I do not want my son away from me 3 out of 7 nights just because, he hasn't been there for him at night anyway.

Fr_Chuck · Aug 15, 2011, 07:29 PM

Please understand, your ex is very, very likely unless there is a reason not to. Get Joint custody, if he makes a motion for it.

You have child one week, he has child the next week, and holidays are done or exchanged each year, one has christmas this year, the other the next and so on.

Joint custody is very very common, esp in California.

And to be honest it is only fair, since the child is his also.
And so after perhaps a short time frame for child to get used to dad, the child will get used to being there, and dad will get used to being a full parent during his week.

There is no reason listed why father could not get that if he wanted it.

In fact, some fathers even get primary custody, when I was divorced I got custody of my child, and mother only had visits.

Confused333 · Aug 16, 2011, 08:57 AM

The major problem with this is he's just doing this to hurt me, Even now that we still live under one roof he leaves as soon as my child is sleeping. He goes out with buddies I put my son to sleep 98% of the time only when he is home my son will say can Dad tuck me in which is very rare that he is home at all.
I don't think that Im being unreasonable about every other weekend and once every week ( these are only overnights) I don't mind him spending all the time he wants with our son, of course I want my son to have his dad in his life. But, I DON'T want him to be dumped on Grandma while dad goes out with buddies when he can be with his own mom who took care of him for 4 years ( my son is 4) My attorney said that I am being reasonable and with my husbands history of leaving my son with me while he goes out this is bound to happen him leaving my son with grandma and heading out.

AK lawyer · Aug 16, 2011, 09:02 AM

Originally Posted by Confused333

... My attorney has asked for him to pay my fees, he will not agree to it. ...

Originally Posted by Confused333

The major problem with this is he's just doing this to hurt me...
I don't think that Im being unreasonable ...

Ok, so if he won't negotiate in good faith, take it to trial and tell the judge what you are telling us.

Trying to negotiate only goes so far. There comes a time to stop wasting time at the negotiating table and take it up with the judge.

ScottGem · Aug 16, 2011, 09:19 AM

I've merged your threads since they all relate. Please don't start a new thread over the same issue. Any future followups should be posted as a Reply/Answer to this thread.

Confused333 · Aug 19, 2011, 08:52 AM

He told me that if you believe that I was around at least 20% of the time then lets do an 80/20 custody who knows what that is in CA?

excon · Aug 19, 2011, 08:57 AM

Hello again, Confused:

80/20 sounds like an ordinary visitation agreement, where the father gets the child every other weekend, and one night a week. Plus every other holiday, and two weeks or more during the summer.

Or, something of that nature..

excon

Confused333 · Aug 19, 2011, 09:04 AM

Well that is what I said is that you will get our son every other weekend sat morning 9am -sunday 8pm and every week you can have an overnighter on tuesdays from 5pm -wed. 8:30 am ( he will drop off at day care) he said I don't know what an 80 20 is and I should ask around because he wants at least two more nights during the weeks he doesn't have our four year old over the weekend. Which is just him hurting me because he is just going to have his mother watch my kid while he goes out with buddies anyway.