[smartygurl]

I love him so much and he loves me, and we've been dating for a couple months now and everything is just perfect. Only problem is that he's married, but he told me he will leave his wife for me and I haven't really told anybody. Its not that easy. Any advice?
Please don't judge me -__- thanks!

[Wondergirl]

When will he leave his wife for you?

[Enigma1999]

K, I won't judge you, cause you're a kid, and doesn't know any better.

HOWEVER, I WILL judge him!

What makes you think he will leave his wife for you? Do your parents know about this?

[Synnen]

What do you mean, don't judge you?

You're in love with someone old enough to be your GRANDFATHER who is a PEDOPHILE (that's what they call people who want to have sex with minors) and who isn't ever going to leave his wife for you, no matter what he tells you.

This is what you should do: Stop seeing him until he can give you a copy of his divorce papers. THEN you will know he's serious about leaving his wife.

If he's not willing to do that, or tells you that "it's too complicated"--well, he just wants to get in your pants, he doesn't really love you then.

[southamerica]

This is what you should do: Stop seeing him until he can give you a copy of his divorce papers. THEN you will know he's serious about leaving his wife.

Bonus to this scenario: by the time the divorce is finalized. OP will be legal.

Not that it fixes the basic moral fiber of the pedophile she's dating.

[talaniman]

Simple one here, leave him alone until he does divorce his wife. Ask your dad if he is serious, or playing with your very young mind. No judgment, justs FACT!

[Cat1864]

How long have you been 17?
Does he have children?
How did you get involved with him?

How do you 'date' a 50 year old married man?

Does he take you out to dinner or the movies? Do you go anywhere you might see other people? Do you just stay in and enjoy each other's company?

If you have to keep your relationship secret, then you aren't dating. If the only place you see him is in some hidey-hole with no one else around, then you aren't dating. If you do go out and he introduces you as his daughter's friend, then you aren't in a relationship. You are being used.

I am not judging you, but I think you are too young and inexperienced to know what love is. I think you are probably attracted to the attention he is giving you. It probably is giving you something you are missing in your home/family.

A lesson to learn now, people who cheat on one partner will often cheat on the next one too. The chances seem to be even higher if their next relationship is with the person who was their accomplice. Even if if he didn't, how could trust someone who leave his wife? How soon after you turn 20 will he be looking for the next young woman who will understand him because you don't?

How long before you start judging yourself? Can you live with the thought of being the other woman?

Do you want to find out how many other 17 year olds (perhaps younger) females he has told the same story you are hearing?

[hheath541]

Most cheaters tell their mistresses they're going to leave their wives. Few ever do.

You need to stop having any contact with him until you are 18. After that, if you want to live a secret life as the other woman, that's up to you.



Here's a bit of a reality check for you:

You WILL be judged. You will be called a home-wrecker, gold-digger (even if he doesn't really have any money), and any number of other names. He will be called a cradle-robber, pedophile, and who knows what else.

Do you see you guys having a relationship in 5 years? 10? 20?

Do you think you'll have kids?

Do you plan to get married, on the off chance he really does leave his wife?

How will your family react when they find out? Will your parents disown you? Kick you out?

How will his react? Does he have kids or grandkids that will react badly to you ruining his marriage? Will he really be willing to risk losing his family over you?

Do you plan to go to college? Are you going to limit your options so you stay nearby? Are you going to not go to college so you don't have to leave him?

Is he going to go to your graduation? Is he going to be able congratulate you after the hat toss? Will he be able to go to your college graduation? Go to office parties? Celebrate birthdays, holidays, and exciting events with you?

While he's spending all that time with you, what will his wife and family think he's doing?

[Alty]

I love him so much and he loves me, and we've been dating for a couple months now and everything is just perfect. only problem is that hes married, but he told me he will leave his wife for me and I haven't really told anybody. Its not that easy. Any advice?
Please don't judge me -__- thanks!

Hard not to judge someone doing something this foolish, so I can't promise not to judge.

You're a child, he's old enough to be your grandfather, and he's married. I have to ask, what, other then sex with a young child, does he get out of this relationship? What do you get out of it?

He won't leave his wife for you. I'd bet money on it.

When you get older he'll dump you and find someone new to replace you. He's not in love with you, he's in love with what you do for him. He's a pedophile, and he's a cheater. What a great guy! Won't you be proud to bring him home to meet mom and dad? Wait, is he older then your dad? Maybe they can become pals.

You're a sex toy, a fun play thing. Are you happy being that, or do you want more?

[Fr_Chuck]

It is time for you to tell everyone, starting with his wife.

If he is willing to leave her, just ask when, and I bet he has to get this or that done first, or it is money or something.

He is using you for sex to fulfill some sick need in his life. I hope he is paying a lot of your bills, since a mistress should be well paid ( or is that a hooker who is well paid)

[mystific]

The joys of finding a wee young thing to fall in love with him... so he has someone able to take care of him in his dotage.

Free slave labour.

[jkbparis]

Well I'm a 40 year old man in love with a 66 year old man. I guess that is different in that by virtue of my age I have judged that the situation is right for me. Our young friend here however is in for a tough one but she won't listen to that. We do not chose who we love. Oh, my friend is married. Not sure if that is relevant as it suits me...