[heismine]

Can I sue husbands girlfriend for having a jointed account with him,we are still married
Going on 22 years now, she lives in another state.

[Fr_Chuck]

NO?? On what grounds ? A person can have joint accounts with dozens of non related people.

You can sue husband for divorce and ask that money to be considered family money to be split of course

[heismine]

What ground? He leaves me and my two girls at helpless starveing points and she still gets our money regardless of anything my children need.

[Wondergirl]

Do you have a joint account with him? How do you buy food?

[heismine]

I did have one,but its only mine now, since he has one with her,his checks are put in threw his work that's how I buy food,he only puts in what he wants ,he advances most of the money and sends it to her.

[Wondergirl]

Have you considered divorce? Would he go with you to couples counseling?

His paychecks go into your account? Or he gives you only so much? Do you have a source of income?

How does he explain this to you?

[Fr_Chuck]

If you are separate then file for custody of the kids and go to court for support. Unless there is a court order to provide support for the kids, he has no real legal obligation to give you part of his pay check. It will look bad in divorce court if he has not,

But you can sue, divorce court and custody of the kids and child support and perhaps alimony

[Alty]

Like Chuck said, if you two divorce, you can claim that this account (since he is a joint on the account) is family money, money from your marriage, and the courts will likely split the money with, your husband, and the girlfriend (as she is also a joint on the account).

Of course any other marital assets would also be split between you and your husband. The other bank accounts, the house, car, etc. etc.

I guess the question is, how much money is it? Is it worth splitting up everything else? Is it worth a divorce?

[heismine]

The money he sends her is family money,she is divorceing her husband for mine and she still lives with hers,my husband works oversweas,he come homes 4 times a year,he won't file for divorce, he tells me he still loves me,comes home to me and then goes to see her,I won't file for divorce because I don't want one,she destoyed my marriage,she knew him since school and messed around with him on his first wife,mow I'm married to him for 22 years and she finds him on classmates and starts seeing him behind my back.

[Fr_Chuck]

Ok, do you not want a divorce for religious reasons or because of social or culture teachings ? Perhaps a legal separation and you file for child support.

But if you can't pay bills and will not leave husband and sue for support, then you will need to get a job and wait till he files for divorce on his terms instead of yours, After he has already hid or got rid of his money or investments and you get a lot less.

[heismine]

I worked on and off throughout our marriage,no I'm not employed for over 7 years now, I was a housewife he only has this overseas job for 5 years now,she wants him to quit this job and go work in the state she lives in,she is a realtor for Remax gold,I have no money to do anything with.

[Wondergirl]

Are you able to get a job, even a part-time one?

If you won't divorce him, what are your hopes -- to wait this out and hope he returns to you?

(Sorry for all the questions. Wish I could invite you to my kitchen and have a cup of tea with you.)

[0rphan]

Whether you are divorced, married or just live as parteners in the UK the father has to support his children,if he refuses then the government department CSA will have this money stopped from his pay check before he even gets it, he will have no say in the matter,surely there must be an equivalent government office that supports children in the USA? The welfare of the children has to come first,there has to be something that can be done,he cannot be allowed to get away with this.

Sadly, I am not familiar with American law,my apologies, but this situation can clearly not go on.Do you have a facility where in a case like this, you are allowed to seek legal advice for free if you have no or very little income,as you do in this country?

I think this is what you need to do, just to find out where you stand,something needs to be done now.If you can get to see a solicitor/lawyer,take along any proof of bank accounts,statements,income,things of that nature,maybe proof of identity, also your marriage certificate.

I think you should contact your husband telling him that the money he is putting into your account barely covers food and bills... the children are suffering, tell him he needs to send more for you to get off the bread line.

What about his family, how do they feel about this?I take it you have told them! Go to them tell them what has and is happening, how his children are suffering because of his adultory... right now you need some support, don't be too proud to reach out for help, you'd be amazed how some people can rally round in this situation.
Takecare