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New Member
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Jun 21, 2011, 06:12 AM
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Does my son's father have any control over where my son and I live and for how long?
My son's father and I recently split up. I am moving back home to El Paso, Tx to stay with my parents until I can get back on my feet. (We currently live in Houston). My ex agreed to me taking our son with me. He was totally fine with everything yesterday, but this morning he showed me a paper he typed up, basically an agreement for me to sign stating that basically he's "giving me permission" to go to El Paso with our son, but I have to be back in Houston by November 1, 2011 or legal action would be taken. I told him I'm not agreeing to that because that's only about 5 months and I don't know how long it's going to take me to save up enough money to move back to Houston. (I want to move back eventually, once I have enough money saved for my son and I to get our own place), but I don't know how long it's going to take, and I don't want a time limit. My question is, can he do that? Does he have any control over how long we're in El Paso for? And if he does take me to court over it, would he have a "case"? I told him that he can come visit our son as often as he can, which will be about once a month because he'd have to fly there. He says he shouldn't have to travel to see our son since I'm the one who decided to end our relationship. PLEASE give me advice on if he can control where we go and how long we stay.
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New Member
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Jun 21, 2011, 07:05 AM
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Were you married? Check your divorce papers. Most will say, not out of state. If you were never married, I am not a lawyer, but I would think he has no say. If all else, check with your lawyer if you have one or find free legal advise.
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Computer Expert and Renaissance Man
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Jun 21, 2011, 09:20 AM
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First this is a legal issue. The paper is drew up has almost no legal value and is basically unenforceable. As long as you aren't leaving the state, there is probably not an issue.
Also, I suspect you are not married, but did he acknowledge paternity? Has anything been done in the courts to determine custody, visitation etc.
Without such court orders, you would be free to move, but he may be able to get emergency orders preventing leaving with the child.
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Expert
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Jun 21, 2011, 09:37 AM
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Originally Posted by crystalmp85
... I don't know how long it's going to take me to save up enough money to move back to Houston. (I want to move back eventually, once I have enough money saved for my son and I to get our own place), but I don't know how long it's gonna take, and I don't want a time limit. My question is, can he do that? Does he have any control over how long we're in El Paso for? ...
No, not unless he goes to court and gets an order prohibiting you from taking the child to El Paso.
But saving up enough to live in Houston shouldn't be solely your responsibility. He has a responsibility to support the child. If he is not paying child support you can and should seek a court order that he do so immediately.
If he wants to write up an agreement, have him write up one providing that he will pay you a specific amount monthly for child support and, in addition, that he will pay you a specific amount to enable you to move back by November 1st (or whenever).
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Internet Research Expert
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Jun 21, 2011, 10:22 AM
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Originally Posted by crystalmp85
My son's father and I recently split up. I am moving back home to El Paso, Tx to stay with my parents until I can get back on my feet. (We currently live in Houston). My ex agreed to me taking our son with me. He was totally fine with everything yesterday, but this morning he showed me a paper he typed up, basically an agreement for me to sign stating that basically he's "giving me permission" to go to El Paso with our son, but I have to be back in Houston by November 1, 2011 or legal action would be taken. I told him I'm not agreeing to that bc that's only about 5 months and I don't know how long it's going to take me to save up enough money to move back to Houston. (I want to move back eventually, once I have enough money saved for my son and I to get our own place), but I don't know how long it's gonna take, and I don't want a time limit. My question is, can he do that? Does he have any control over how long we're in El Paso for? And if he does take me to court over it, would he have a "case"? I told him that he can come visit our son as often as he can, which will be about once a month bc he'd have to fly there. He says he shouldn't have to travel to see our son since I'm the one who decided to end our relationship. PLEASE give me advice on if he can control where we go and how long we stay.
Why not do the right thing and since your not on your feet and don't know when just move. Leave the child to his father until such a time as your back on your feet again? By leaving to such a distance you do know you will be held responsible for the cost of visitation don't you? So if it takes being flown there for visitation its on your tab not his. If that doesn't sound like something you can afford then your better off going through the courts and getting things settled before you do any kind of moving.
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