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Inesa · May 28, 2011, 02:33 PM

My fiancé passed away in his sleep less than 3mnths before our wedding day. We have been together for almost 9yrs. Life doesn't have a meaning no more. I'm sort of the machine that needs to wake up, go 2work, my mum is here so she makes sure I eat. The rest doesn't matter any more. Sometimes I'm OK I even laugh, but most of the time I'm numb and trying not to break down. Its so very hard to even let my brain register that he isn't here no more...

Fr_Chuck · May 28, 2011, 06:00 PM

Take the time and grieve, it is still a short time, and we all take different times and different ways to finally move on with our life.

The main thing is you were together for 9 years, so it is going to be hard, no instant or quick fixes.

Try and remember the love they had for you, and that they would want you to live on and be happy. Also think and find a way to live for them, some project or activity to do in their memory

JudyKayTee · May 30, 2011, 04:52 PM

Originally Posted by Inesa

My fiance passed away in his sleep less than 3mnths before our wedding day. we have been together for almost 9yrs. life doesn't have a meaning no more. im sort of the machine that needs to wake up, go 2work, my mum is here so she makes sure i eat. the rest doesnt matter any more. sometimes i'm ok i even laugh, but most of the time i'm numb and trying not to break down. its so very hard to even let my brain register that he isn't here no more...

When did he pass away?

Inesa · Jun 4, 2011, 04:20 AM

17th of April

JudyKayTee · Jun 4, 2011, 05:51 AM

That is so terribly recent - no wonder you are numb. I was widowed and the entire first year was terrible beyond belief. Do you have some days which are better than others? Are you taking care of yourself? Grief is a strange, changing process. I'm sure you have discovered that. If crying is the way you cope, then cry. I worry about people who bottle their grief inside, don't express it, let it eat away at them.

Do you have friends you can talk to, people who will listen to you?

Inesa · Jun 9, 2011, 02:28 AM

I do get better days, not very often. I'm not sleeping or eating much, just haven't felt hungry recently, mum was with me all the time for a month, and I do have friends that are there for me, I'm also getting bereavement counselling (only just started) so maybe it will help to ease this pain; I cry a lot, sometimes I get so angry at steve, how could he do that to me. I don't know who I am anymore or how to live my life, mostly I just don't want to do anything