[Jadzia]

I have been separated from my husband for 2 years, with no chance of reconciliation. During that time a close male friend who experienced trouble in his marriage and I ended up falling in love and having an affair. His marriage has now ended however the affair is also over. He is in counselling dealing with the issues in his life, is still friends with his wife who is also now seeking professional help for the psychatric disorder that she has had for years. We still want to be friends but I am wondering if this is possible considering all that has happened. If his wife's problems are worked out he could go back to her in time (has told me this is possible however he will spend at least a year on his own while he works himself out).
Is it possible to let go of love and to just be friends or am I better off cutting off all ties?

[JoeCanada76]

Are you in communication with him now? As far as just being friends and remaining friends do you think this is possible without the love affair. It is possible they may reconcile and you need to stay clear of him for the mean time until he figures out what to do. So what would the best thing to do right now is stay clear and let him work through his things.

It is up to you personally what you feel is the best decision. I think you should cut off all ties, but that is just my opinion. Especially with him telling you it is possible him and his other half might work things out.

Joe

[Sentra]

If the two of you can agree to just be friends and maintain that level of maturity, then I don't see why you shouldn't, since the both of you are going through troubled times right now. Its good to have someone to talk to that knows what you are going through, just know that if either of you can't resist taking things further, the friendship will not last and possibly end on bad terms. Wishing you well...

[talaniman]

If you can pay the consequenses you can do what ever you want so know that someone can get hurt in the end and realize this friendship is on borrowed time so if you know that going in then have fun while it lasts.

[Bluerose]

I believe some people come into our lives for a reason. Maybe they need our help, maybe we need theirs. And if you are mature enough you can simply go with the flow and see where it takes you. And be ready to accept whatever outcome there is.

What are the chances of becoming friends with them both? He obviously still cares for her.

My guy helped me through the fallout of a bad childhood, married twenty years, divorced almost fifteen, he has been engaged twice and married once since we broke up. Now he is with a very nice woman and although her and I are not very close, I like her because she is good to him - and I love him very much. Just not in love with him.

I look at it this way… There is enough going on in this world as it is, so if we can get along with exes, their new friends and maybe their kids… I say go for it.

My daughter's husband was a bit of a guy when he was younger and has four daughters by different people - one of them is only a few years younger than my daughter. I have them all on my 'Grandchildren's Christmas List'.

Granted, I'm a bit of a dreamer… I want the whole world to get along… But I'm not that much of a dreamer… I know peace begins at home.


Light In The Soul

If there is light in the soul,
There will be beauty in the person.
If there is beauty in the person,
There will be harmony in the house.
If there is harmony in the house,
There will be order in the nation.
If there is order in the nation,
There will be peace in the world.