[NewYork100]

March 5, 2011: Although we've been friends for 7 years, this is our first date.

March 12, 2011: The next week, since I know Eric will be a frequent visitor to my home and I have a foster child, I ask him to fill out the Frequent Visitor paperwork. He lists his relationship with me as "Boyfriend." This document is notarized. Immediately after our first date, Eric tells me he loves me. On our third date he tells me, "I'm in. I want you to know I'm in. And not till it gets rough; I'm in for the long term."

March 22, 2011: Eric picked out the RE and set up a visit at the Reproductive Endocrinologist near his home and who is across from his doctor's office, who informs Eric that he will need to sign an affidavit stating he intends to marry me so the physician can protect me as his patient. Eric agrees verbally to the request and gives me a completion date immediately after we return from Cabo. Eric and I immediately drive over to his physician and he gets an appointment setup for the immediate Monday.

March 27, 2011: April 2, 2011: Eric tells me his ex-girlfriend has been in contact stating "she wants to pay him back" for her son's nursery school.

March 29, 2011: Eric visits his physician the following Monday to tell him he is trying to produce sperm (He has a vasectomy). The physician changes his medication regimen by taking him off Testim and adding Clomid to this regimen to help increase sperm count. After two months they will test his sperm for viability.
April 11, 2011: We leave for Cabo where Eric is distant and withdrawn, but where he continues to make a show that he is taking the Clomid, he continues to talk about our future, though he does not look me in the eye. He tells me he loves me. I can tell something is 'off' but it's so minor that I don't want to make a big deal of it. When asked on April 12 why he hasn't changed our Facebook status to in a relationship he has no answer.

April 16, 2011: After arriving back back at DFW, Eric drives me home and leaves almost immediately. He does not tell me he will never speak to me again (except for a perfunctory call on Sunday morning to tell me he is going on a driving trip to take pictures and he never calls me after that). He leaves extensive clothing here including dress shoes, two pair dress pants, three dress shirts, tshirts, underwear, socks, three pair of jeans, shaving paraphernalia, cologne, casual shirts and several pair of shorts. His behavior (outwardly) continues to 'assure' me that 'nothing' is wrong.

April 17, 2011: I call him three times on Sunday. On Monday night he emails me at midnight stating “Hey Susan, Hope things are going well for you. I've just been relaxing and catching up on NetFlix. Just taking a little 'me' time I guess. –Eric. The not calling or texting is completely out of character as is his “buddy” style note; usually he is very loving and specific in his word choices. He never signs personal emails as “Eric”.

April 18, 2011: He also knows that a television that he ordered (and I helped pay for) is being delivered on Monday April 11 and installed on Tuesday April 12. He does not return my calls, text or email me. He emails me once at work to say, "Hey Susan, [some minor work related task] "I hope things are going well for you. I am happy to be back." There is no contact after that.

Requests:
1. Reimbursement for the cost of the American Airlines tickets to Cabo. Eric stated that he needed me to put them on my credit card for the short term and that he would pay me back. He told me he made $200,000 per year and didn't need me to pay for them. The total is $1597.62.
2. Reimbursement for covering $900.00 of the cost of an unneeded TV which he purchased 24 hours before he effectively left the relationship. If he had told me at any point before the Tuesday following the end of the Cabo trip, I could have returned the TV for a full refund. He however, did not tell me he was leaving the relationship at any point.

I believe that Eric, knowingly and willingly emotionally left the relationship before our trip to Cabo commenced on April 11, 2011. I witnessed a major change in his behavior. He did not attempt to have sex with me during the Cabo trip. He denied anything was wrong and continued to point out that he was taking Clomid for sperm production.

I believe he knew he was no longer in the relationship, and indeed, started another one before we left. The reason he did not inform me was the cost of the tickets which I had purchased was prohibitive and he would lose his airline tickets to his vacation.

I believe he did not contact me about the TV (which I willingly would have returned, since I could use the $900) because he knew this would show his intent with regard to our relationship had changed quite a while before. Obviously, since we had little to no contact between Saturday and Tuesday, when the TV was installed, there is nothing I could have said or done to affect our relationship status.

[Fr_Chuck]

Ok, break up with him and move on ? So what is your question?

Many relationships don't last long for many reasons

[NewYork100]

If it's not obvious I have "broken up with him." I didn't officially tell him but que sera sera since he didn't bother to pick up the phone with me either. The point isn't we aren't dating; the point is that he had ample time to bail out of our financial arrangemnts and he chose not to.

However, I got taken for almost 3,000 dollars in a very short period. To me, if you knowingly ask me to buy you airline tickets and have no intention of paying me back, that's fraud. If you present yourself as a friend or confidant during a very short period with the intent of bleeding mr dry then that's fraud.

Just because he presented himself as my boyfriend doesn't mean he was. I mean seriously, he either lied the entire relationship to get what he wanted, or he lied the last two weeks to get the monetary benefit he received. In both cases, he received the benefit of a lot of money in a short period *after* he decided to leave the relationship (based on his behavior).

[justcurious55]

And you still haven't told us what your question is. What is it that you are looking for help with?

[NewYork100]

Sorry about that--my question is, can I ask for payment for the trip and TV? These items are listed as 1 and 2 at the bottom. The way I see it, I should discard all the personal stuff and just present it as X was a friend who told me they would pay me for these items and instead they've cut off all contact (without any kind of notice).

If he tells me that he will "pay me back" for these items and that they are for him, shouldn't he have to pay for them? I know this will be an uphill battle, but I'd at least like to send the demand later, then have a lawyer (I have a legal program at work) send a demand letter, which is usually enough... I know if I go to small claims that without some kind of written proof he was going to pay me back I will lose. But I'd like to try.

[justcurious55]

Sure you can ask. There's nothing stopping you from asking. But like you said, it could be an uphill battle and you said yourself you have no written proof saying he's pay you back.

[JudyKayTee]

I have a question - why is this posted under missing persons?

You can't just dispose of his personal "stuff." You have to send him a letter giving him a time frame within which to come and pick up his belongings. It's usually 30 days.

Yes, you can sue him and it will be your word against his whether these were gifts or loans.

You knew him for 7 years and this behavior was a surprise to you? He said he made over $200,000 a year - did he live a $200,000/year "lifestyle"?