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mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 11:22 AM

I am a 16 year old girl that has always had problems with my mother.My father left and my mom got a boyfriend and now she is married to him. I am like like my mothers stress reliever, everyday she comes home she starts arguing with me and she never fails in hurting my feelings by saying hurtful things.recently we got into this colosal argument about me procrastinating about my volenteer hours and from then on we have stopped talking. Then one day I took my brother to the library without telling anyone and I also took him to burger king for lunch and when I came home she threatened to put me up for adoption right after she said that she was beginning to dislike me, when she said this I didn't even start crying and I actually went on the internet to llok up families willing to adopt a 16 year old because I heard that it was hard for a teen to get adopted.

tickle · Apr 4, 2011, 11:32 AM

Yes, mylife, it is difficult to find adoption for a teen. You can only believe they are empty threats. She probably wouldn't take the time to start the whole process of adoption, and I don't think she will get anywhere anyway.

All things pass. Is she under a lot of stress lately for any particular reason ?

Tick

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 11:33 AM

It's a horrible feeling to think you are not loved.

But what immediately caught my eye was your saying you took your little brother to the library and BK without telling anyone. Does your mother think you are trying to be too grown up and that's why she's on your case?

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 11:35 AM

Yes she is but its like everyone says that I'm the one causing her to be stressed

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 11:38 AM

My grandfather drove me there so actually someone did know where I was going

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 11:40 AM

Does your mom like to know where you are and where your little brother is, even if you two are out with Grandpa? I sure would. I'm thinking she's thinking "irresponsible"? Are there other things like that (like the procrastinating), and she has gotten upset?

tickle · Apr 4, 2011, 11:41 AM

Hi again mylyfe, can you please use the 'reply' feature when you want to reply to us. It is much easier and more comprehensive for us to use as well.

Who is 'everyone' telling you that you are the reason she is stressed? You seem to be a pretty decent kid from what I see in your posts. You are almost an adult, give or take a few years, maybe that is what is worrying her, losing you and she can't handle it and her reaction is completely the opposite. When was the last time you two had a loving mom/daughter conversation ? Can you try and sit down and sort this out with you being the initiator?

Tick

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 11:50 AM

I'm sorry tickle I could not find the reply feature I'm sure that that is one of the problems and that mother/daughter thing that your referring to is unheard of between my mother and I

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 11:52 AM

I admit that it was a little irresponsible but the adoption thing and talking about my father in a negative way is uncalled for to me.

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 11:52 AM

The reply thing is the Answer box below the most recent post.

Are you angry that your mom left your dad and married this other guy?

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 11:57 AM

I am furious he left when I was about 2 years old and I don't remember much about him I don't even know why he left

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 12:03 PM

Originally Posted by mylyfe

i am furious he left when i was about 2 years old and i dont remember much about him i dont even know why he left

Thanks for finding the Answer box!! Yay!!

It must really hurt, then, when your mom disses him or says bad things about him to you -- and you definitely lose respect for her.

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 12:25 PM

To be honest with you I'm slowely losing respect for almost everyone around me I feel so alone all my family is on my mothers side and they all blame me.

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 12:38 PM

Originally Posted by mylyfe

to be honest with you im slowely losing respect for almost everyone around me i feel so alone all my family is on my mothers side and they all blame me.

I'm sorry to hear that! Blame you for what? Weren't you very small when your parents' marriage ended?

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 12:45 PM

They were not married and they blame me for my mom being stressed out.

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 12:47 PM

Her being stressed out now? Do they give examples for why she is stressed, like, you don't help around the house or you talk back to her?

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 12:58 PM

I can't talk back to her and I try my best to stay out of her way

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 01:07 PM

So what's supposedly stressing her about you?

And just between you and me, what do YOU think the external thing is that is stressing her? Or does a lot of her stress come from inside her, that she's creating her own misery?

mylyfe · Apr 4, 2011, 01:11 PM

To me I think she stresses herself out by overreacting about stupid stuff and probably at work and when she comes home all that balled up anger is released on me

Wondergirl · Apr 4, 2011, 01:17 PM

Since you've known her all your life :) and seem really good at figuring her out, what do you think would improve her mood, say, when she comes home from work? Is there something you could do to sweeten her life then?