From reading your posts in your thread on the Divorce Board (
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/divorc...ns-563640.html), the only advice I can give you is counseling for the rest of the of the family even if the son won't go. Other than that, Judy's advice about getting out seems like like your best option.
No where do you mention the children's mother(s), is she still in their lives? If she isn't, is that part of why they are rebelling? If she is, does she have any influence over them?
Quite frankly, I think you and your daughter need to get out before your issues with his children end up hurting your own. Once out of the house and on your own, you can look at ways to fix the problems in the marriage AFTER he fixes the issues with his children. Being a father is more than just yelling at your children and expecting them to change or for other people to raise them for you.
Work on your relationship with your daughter and yourself. Leave the three of them to figure out how to get out of the mess they have piled up around themselves.