Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    watermelon5050's Avatar
    watermelon5050 Posts: 24, Reputation: 13
    New Member
     
    #1

    Apr 3, 2011, 03:42 PM
    In desperate need of advice
    Okay so there's this guy. We've been friends for 3 years but only recently got close. I really like him but he's so confusing. He told me that he likes me "like to date" and that he would "definitely" date me but hasn't made any moves toward that. I haven't seen him in a while and he told me that he wants to see me soon but never asks me to hang out and says he's always busy. He says that he loves talking to me but he rarely does. He asked me to prom but then said "he didn't know if he could go". The weird thing is that he wasn't pressured into saying any of this. I didn't ask if he would take me to prom or if he liked me or if he wanted to hang out. He says all of this stuff on his own. I guess my question is what the heck is going on? Or advice would be much appreciated too. (:
    mandyjane2's Avatar
    mandyjane2 Posts: 4, Reputation: 3
    New Member
     
    #2

    Apr 3, 2011, 03:53 PM
    Asking him is the only way you can get the answer you need.(From what I've,e heard from this I think he would like to date you though)
    ken007nielsen's Avatar
    ken007nielsen Posts: 288, Reputation: 211
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Apr 3, 2011, 05:11 PM
    I would say this is a no go.

    You're way to accesible for him, and because of that he can summon you at will, and you will be there from what I'm reading above. What that means, at one point he proberly did like you, but since it has been so easy for him to get you to play his game. He might feel that this is two easy, it's only a one-way relationship where he does what he want's then you tag along.

    So what you need to do is back off and let him initiate all the contact between the two of you, and be a little more reserved, don't jump each time he ask's for it.
    tessa99's Avatar
    tessa99 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #4

    Apr 3, 2011, 05:35 PM
    If he won't take you any where then he's just nervious to be with you. H really likes you yet he's kind of on the shy side give him some time. Ask him to go on a double date with one of your friends and there boyfriend. All you need to do is take your guyses relashionship step by step and soon enuff you guys will be going out all of the time.
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #5

    Apr 4, 2011, 04:58 AM
    I see nothing wrong in telling him, exactly what you have said here. Let him know that you are confused with his mixed messages. He likes to talk to you, but doesn't have, or can't find the time. He'd like to date you, but never asks. He wants to take you to prom, but isn't sure he can make it.

    He could be waiting for you to to make a plan, which you are perfectly capable of doing. Call him up and ask him if he wants to go see a movie Friday night. Break the ice. Maybe he is just too shy, or unsure of himself. If he can't seem to get it together enough to simply go on a date to a movie with you, I would consider him to not be a good candidate to follow through with anything he says he's 'like' to do.

    At some point he's either come through, or you will realize that he never will. My advice to you is to not keep banking on the 'what if's', and don't hang around waiting for him.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #6

    Apr 4, 2011, 09:03 AM

    He is so full of lip service, and that's the easy way to go. Nothing but talk, and no action.

    When words and actions don't match, ignore them, and do your own thing with people who do more than just talk.
    watermelon5050's Avatar
    watermelon5050 Posts: 24, Reputation: 13
    New Member
     
    #7

    Apr 6, 2011, 07:42 PM
    Comment on talaniman's post
    Yeah I was thinking the same thing. Just hoped it was different. Thanks for the help though! (:
    watermelon5050's Avatar
    watermelon5050 Posts: 24, Reputation: 13
    New Member
     
    #8

    Apr 6, 2011, 07:42 PM
    Comment on Jake2008's post
    This helped a lot thank you!
    watermelon5050's Avatar
    watermelon5050 Posts: 24, Reputation: 13
    New Member
     
    #9

    Apr 24, 2011, 06:09 PM
    What does this mean?
    Threads merged

    Hi. So this kid that I really like told me that "he doesn't want a girlfriend right now because he's in an odd time but likes me" he's told me before that he would "definitely date me". He did recently get out of a relationships though 3 months ago and he dated this girl for 2 years. I thought he would be over it by now so I don't know how long it'll take. So should I wait for him (cause I really really like him) or is this guys way of letting girls off easy?
    amicon's Avatar
    amicon Posts: 6,066, Reputation: 1911
    Uber Member
     
    #10

    Apr 24, 2011, 11:05 PM

    You take his word for it-he doesn't want a girlfriend.

    He's still not over his ex,so leave him to his healing and move on with your life.

    Don't wait around in limbo for anyone!
    adviceishere's Avatar
    adviceishere Posts: 1,027, Reputation: 492
    Ultra Member
     
    #11

    Apr 25, 2011, 02:01 AM
    He may even be over his ex but just wants to live the single life for now. Don't wait around for him, you clearly want different things, if your happy to date each other and also other people then go on a date with him but by the sound of things I don't think you could cope with just dating him and knowing he is he also dating others. I think you have more feelings in this than he does.
    I wish's Avatar
    I wish Posts: 5,296, Reputation: 2030
    Family & People Expert
     
    #12

    Apr 25, 2011, 06:44 PM

    Sounds to me that he's letting you down easy. If he really wasn't ready for a relationship, but interested in you, he could have suggested to take it slow. Instead, it sounds more like he let you down easy.

    I don't see any indication that waiting around would change his mind, because he should know that by telling you what he said, he would risk losing you to someone else.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

My dog has kidney faliure, does anybody have any other advice, please I'm desperate? [ 8 Answers ]

My black lab Duke is almost 4 and has been diagnosed with kidney failure. We first found this by accident in April 2010. I was limping one morning so I took him to the vet and then ran some blood work and found that his "kidney enzymes were off." I wasn't too pleased with this vet so I was waiting...

Desperate need for help. [ 3 Answers ]

Well about two months ago me and two of my friends got arrested at school for smoking weed at school. I convinced her that I learned my lesson and I did. But not as big as lesson I should have. I figured that if I never take drugs to school ill be good. Today I finally got to hangout with one of my...

Desperate for advice! [ 4 Answers ]

A lot of strange things have been happening in my home... most I can & have chalked up to be normal problems. With that being said there's two that are really bothering me. My two yr old son (b-day jan 2nd 09) has been talking to someone. The first time this happened (2 days ago)i was very...

Help.. Please? Desperate for advice. [ 4 Answers ]

Well I'm pretty new to this site and I'm not really sure where to start.. I guess it all started with my junior prom. Last year everyone was obsessing about our junior prom and who they would bring. Somehow I ended up going with this guy that every girl in the school was practically...

Advice on Giving Advice [ 16 Answers ]

Hey all! I have a slight dilemna and I'd like it if you guys and gals can help me out. I have two friends who are in a relationship together, but things have become kind of rocky between them. The problem is that they are both my friends so they both confide in me and ask for advice. At present...


View more questions Search