[endoftheaffair]

A colleague in work has been in a relationship and living with our boss and her children for the past three years. She is 22 years older than him and her children are his age. He's my age. At Christmas, I offered him a lift home.

We got stuck in the snow and when eventually I made it home, I invited him in to dry off. We realised then and there that we had a massive connection. Him and his partner live round the corner from me too and so for the next four days he popped back to mine. We'd just chat and hold hands.

Then on Christmas eve he popped round and we kissed for the first time and he stayed until the early hours. He broke up with his partner on Boxing Day because he felt terrible for cheating and thought that things mustn't be right between them for him to cheat on her. However, after a week he changed his mind and went back to her.

I was devastated. But literally two days later he contacted me and an intense affair began. The more we saw each other the more we wanted to see each other. Eventually we started to have sex, which was amazing. I've never felt such a phyiscal and emotional connection to anyone before and he said the same. He said although the sex was amazing, it was more than that; he just wanted to be around me all the time. He always felt guilty and said he'd never cheated on anyone before and that I had "totally turned his head". He said I was in his mind constantly.

Then last week after me driving us home from work (I often did this, we'd park at my flat and he'd run home), we kissed in the car and within 10 minutes he sent me a text saying that they had broken up because he told her about us. I was thrilled to bits but felt guilty too. He planned on moving back to his mums, but she never answered his calls, so I invited him to mine. He stayed with me for four wonderful days.

In the meantime, his (now ex) has gone into work (thank goodness we are in separate buildings from her, so I've not seen her yet!) telling everyone the reason for the break up, so our colleagues are not talking to us which is making our lives miserable. After four happy days together, which were amazing, he woke up that fourth morning staring into space and looked miserable. He said the whole thing had suddenly hit him. He finally moved into his mums. Slowly moving his belognings out of mine. It totally felt like we were breaking up and he said he felt sick and awful, but he needed time to himself for a bit.

He is now saying that he needs some real space from me to sort his head out because its all so raw and he isn't even sure if he wants a relationship with me or not, because he doesn't think his heart would be in it right now and it wouldn't be fair to me. He's assured me that no one else is involved and that he won't go back to her (but he has before hasn't he?) hes' just not sure if he's ready for another relationship.

He hasn't spoken or texted me for two days... considering we texted each other literally every hr from the moment we woke up till we went to bed for the past 3 months, its been horrid. My heart is breaking. I think about him 24/7. I just don't understand, its as if I've he's fallen out with me... I've no idea what to do for the best... can't stop crying... any advice?

[talaniman]

What did you expect from a young guy? He got rid of his live-in for you, and left you, so now he is as free as a bird to get whom ever he wants and you two are left with broken hearts.

When the lust fades, its over. Sorry, but it seems YOU BOTH, all three of you should have known better. Guess he has to get his own rides to work and home huh? Look sorry to be harsh, but you had no remorse for the one he cheated on, so there is very little sympathy for the one he cheated with.

Young guy played you both.

[mmresd]

I agree with tal, both got played. Next time respect someone's relationship so maybe they will have some respect for you. It was fun, it is now over, and you can now start again to enjoy your singleness because I guarantee you. He sure will.

Good luck,

Javi

[Denice87]

I agree respect others relationships...