[Silver222]

Hello. 1st time here...

I was very active in our small school PTA fundraising for past few years. Have gotten less so as my kids are older. I was never an officer, just a very active member. I am still active, just bit less so.

There is a new group of women in charge of our PTA now and they created a PTA 'social network' page on-line for accessing information parents/volunteers may want to know. We actually only meet in person about every 3 months.

The woman who is admin of the page has long been 'against' me socially, simple because I am friends with someone she despises. (I have for years just ignored this woman and try to take the high road.) I still have lots of ideas about our school, some of which run counter to hers, some of which don't. Recently I expressed an idea that ran counter to hers and she deleted my idea from the social network page, stating she had right to censorship. I brought out the point that our bylaws state that all adults in attendance have a right to debate, vote etc. and that I believed this should apply both to meetings and this web page. (In other words, in my view, deleting my comment was like telling me to shut up in a meeting.) I pointed this out as a way (so I thought) to get her to re-think her censorship(I was never belligerent, just to the point)and instead she has now completely blocked me from viewing the site.(Equal, I think, to banning me from meetings and PTA information simply because I expressed an idea counter to her's.)

This is an inconvenience to me, as I live 20 miles from the school. Do I put up with her silencing or what do I do? I should say the PTO Pres sides with this admin woman. I want to volunteer but now I don't even know what the volunteer needs are unless I go to the next meetings which are held when I usually am working. Has anyone ever heard of such childishness? What do I do? I don't know if others have had it happen to them or not. Not many people seem to post any comments/questions on the PTA site, except to say 'You go girl!" or "You're awesome!" about anything the Pres or admin post. Bylaws also state that membership shall be all adult in compliance with the mission:enrich our children's education through volunteer effort. I don't think I violated that mission and believe I have every right to voice my opinion. I didn't swear or lie or do anything unseemly (In contrast, this woman called me on the phone and called me a [insert name for female dog] after I pointed out that her censorship probably violates PTO bylaws.

I honestly try to keep my personal issues w/ this woman out of my responses. When she called me that on the phone I just said, "That's not a nice thing to say." My goal is getting something good done for the school but she and her 'circle' have lately painted me as the bad guy here. I scratch my head asking how did that happen?

Advice I am anxious for! HELP!

[redhed35]

Why don't you put forward your ideas in the agenda for the next meeting? Its going to be quite difficult for her to delete you from the meeting or discussion there.

I assume the principal of the school is involved in these meetings, you could always pitch your idea to him/her directly, without mentioning the site or this other women.

There's more then one way to defur a feline!

[joypulv]

Either take the time to go to the Board and Principal and fight the good fight, or quit.
I have tried both at times in my life..
It's impossible to know what the Board will do about a social site that was started and run by one person outside of the organization. Hopefully they will order her to delete it or allow all participation if she is going to use the name of the school. Maybe you can get them to run it by the attorney the school has on retainer or part time pay.

[ScottGem]

Here's the thing. Unless the page was created by the school on the schools website, then the person who created the page has control over it.

What she did was not right but not illegal.

You only way to fight this is to go to a meeting and bring up the issue to a vote of the board. You could try speaking to the principal of the school. After all, it is the Parent-Teachers Association which means the school has some say in how its run.

[Fr_Chuck]

If this page is an "official" page operated by the PTA, then address it with the school board and/or the Superintendent of the school.

Next address it with the president of the PTA.

And of course start a new web site that says their web site is wrong and you have better ideas.

[Silver222]

"start a new web site that says their web site is wrong and you have better ideas" Did you mean this sarcasticly or truthfully?

[Silver222]

"I have tried both at times in my life.. ' Thanks. There's a reason I put this under 'personal growth' so I'd really like more input from you to tell me how 'both' ultimately turned out for you. I am wanting to fight/see it through but wonder what the result will be?

[Silver222]

I like that, renaissance man... Here's a second problem I'm facing in terms of personal growth. School sticks its nose out of PTA policies and vice versa, so no help there. The current attendees to meetings are mostly this woman's allies, so I can guess the 'vote' there will not be in my favor. Can you deepen your comment that it was 'not right' I am looking for a way to resolve this in my own mind, even if all I do is find allies here/peace that I knew I was right, even if I can't do anything to change the wrong.

[Fr_Chuck]

Truthfully, start a "un-official" web site for the PTA, you state clearly that this is not an official site, but that the official site is not clearly representing the views of all members.

[ScottGem]

You can either make waves or let the water go under the bridge. If you make waves, there may be further consequences. If you let it go under the bridge your own self esteem may suffer.

You have to make that decision. Personally, I would have my see if their social studies teacher would like an extra credit report on censorship. Then write up this incident and submit. Or, even better, submit it as an article for the school newspaper.

[Silver222]

Hmmmm. My daughter's Humanities class IS studying the Holocaust... I like it, ScottGem, thanks. No school paper, but maybe I can approach the H teacher to bring it to life as a classroom discussion.