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slimchick · Feb 25, 2011, 09:59 AM

On oct. 24th I had sex with my friend who pulled out at a perfect time. However that same night my boyfriend and I had emotionally intense sex and he came using the pull out method, I think I remembered it as a total rush and a surprise. He claimed to *** in a wash rag an a while later we did it again without him washing off. Who has a greater chance of being my babies daddy seeing that I'm 19 weeks and I believe I was ovulating between oct.24 to 27th. My boyfriend and I share a special kind of sex and my friend an I was just in the heat of the moment and a total one night stand plus I'm certain he came on my belly>

Curlyben · Feb 25, 2011, 10:01 AM

There is NO way of telling until you can conduct a DNA test AFTER the birth.

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 10:02 AM

"Pulling out" means nothing, absolutely nothing. It is NOT a good method of birth control.

"A special kind of sex" has nothing to do with who could be the father. It doesn't matter if the sperm are wearing little red bow ties or are feeling frisky. It takes only one sperm, even a sleepy one, to fertilize an egg.

The only way to find out who the baby's father is is by doing a DNA test after the birth.

slimchick · Feb 25, 2011, 10:06 AM

Hmmm I know I just don't know how to tell my boyfriend we need a DNA test

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 10:09 AM

Hmmmm, you're going to have to mention it to him in eight months or so if you want to know who the father is. The baby's looks or hairline or nose shape is no indicator of who the father is.

And maybe your boyfriend needs to know he can't trust you.

slimchick · Feb 25, 2011, 10:14 AM

I was thinking maybe I should ask my friend first seeing that's all I could take right now and hopefully he's not the father. Is there anyway I could get a dna test before birth

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 10:20 AM

No.

Home_Inspector · Feb 25, 2011, 10:30 AM

I would say that mathematically your BF has a greater chance of being the father. That is based on you and him having sex twice that day and you and your friend only once. The math would indicate that the chances of your BF being the father is 66.6% and your friend 33.3%. Math aside there may also be biological differences that come into play, no pun intended. If your BF has a low sperm count and your friend doesn't then the chance it is your friends baby would be as great or greater. I guess it's a bit late to inform you that the pull out method isn't totally effective.

slimchick · Feb 25, 2011, 11:54 AM

Hmmm the guilt eating me alive I can't continue like this I need to know asap. I'm praying to god it's my bf's because ultimately the next way around is going to be a scandal. I learn my lesson don't let temptation consume you. I'm considering an amniocentesis

Home_Inspector · Feb 25, 2011, 12:27 PM

I would just tell the BF he is becoming a dad and move on with your life. If at some point in the future the BF doubts the child is his he can have a DNA test done and if the child is the friends baby you can cross that bridge when you get to it. The more people that know about this the more likely the BF will find out. Just keep it to yourself! Chalk it up to lesson learned the hard way and move on. From this point on you need to do what's best for the child.

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 12:30 PM

Originally Posted by Home_Inspector

From this point on you need to do whats best for the child.

What's best for the child is to know his real father, especially in case of medical complications.

All you're doing is giving her justification for covering her own a$$.

Home_Inspector · Feb 25, 2011, 12:59 PM

I would just wait until the child is born and let the boyfriend believe it is his until that time. Once the child is born you can test the DNA and then see if it is indeed the BF's. If it's the friends then you have some explaining to do. If it's the BF's then never let him know about the friend or he will rightfully never trust you. But I agree with Wondergirl if it ends up being the friends you MUST let the child and friend know about it! And yes I am offerring her a way to get out of this and save some face. If she tells the BF it may be someone else's and it ends up being the BF's child then she will most likely end up a single mom and is that what's best for the child? I don't agree with what she did nor do I condone being unfaithful but I think she should wait until the child is born to tell the truth after she knows who the child belongs to.

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 01:11 PM

Originally Posted by Home_Inspector

I would just wait until the child is born and let the boyfriend believe it is his until that time.

Sweet.

Once the child is born you can test the DNA and then see if it is indeed the BF's.

How's she going to explain to the boyfriend why she wants a DNA sample from him?

And yes I am offerring her a way to get out of this and save some face.

Which means you don't give a hoot about the child, even though you said you do.

Home_Inspector · Feb 25, 2011, 03:41 PM

"How's she going to explain to the bf why she wants a DNA sample from him?"

Getting some hair, saliva or dead skin cell for a DNA test isn't to difficult to do.

"Which means you don't give a hoot about the child, even though you said you do."

How does providing her a way to save face imply that I don't give a hoot about the child? Secondly I never said I did give a hoot for the child, but I would expect her to and to put the child first. I agree with you that if she discovers the child is her friends, she should tell the child and her friend as well as her BF, but I wouldn't tell the BF it may not be his until I knew for sure that it wasn't. If she tells the BF it may not be his and looses him because of it and the child ends up being his, what is the result? What is gained? A single mom with a clear conscience with a child in a single parent household. Is that necessarily the best for the child? I would have to know the BF before I could answer that. That scenario could be avoided if she says nothing until she knows for sure that it isn't his.

Enigma1999 · Feb 25, 2011, 03:47 PM

Originally Posted by Home_Inspector

I would just wait until the child is born and let the boyfriend believe it is his until that time.

That is just plain cruel!

Yeah... lets let this poor guy think this baby is his, when really there is a chance that it's not.

DNA testing can only be done after the baby is born.

OP, you really need to come clean and tell your boyfriend the truth.

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 03:53 PM

Originally Posted by Home_Inspector

Getting some hair, saliva or dead skin cell for a DNA test isn't to difficult to do.

You ARE a murder mystery author, aren't you?

Enigma1999 · Feb 25, 2011, 03:56 PM

Originally Posted by Wondergirl

You ARE a murder mystery author, aren't you?

He just watches too much Dexter and Law and order.:rolleyes:

Home_Inspector · Feb 25, 2011, 04:32 PM

"You ARE a murder mystery author, aren't you?"
No but I did stay at a Holiday Express last night! :)

There are many ways that DNA can be tested. Here are a few ways: toothpicks, used handkerchief/Kleenex, clothing items with sweat, hats with sweat, used dental floss, dirty underwear, envelope or stamp that was licked, cigarette butt, used tooth brush, and fingernail clipping to name a few. Most any material that contains biological matter on it can be used to obtain a DNA profile for paternity testing purposes.

I love the way this has moved from answering her questions to flaming me. But if it makes you all feel better please continue. I will sacrifice myself so you can feel better. :P

Wondergirl · Feb 25, 2011, 04:48 PM

Originally Posted by Home_Inspector

"I love the way this has moved from answering her questions to flaming me. But if it makes you all feel better please continue. I will sacrifice myself so you can feel better. :P

I'm not flaming you.

Why are you encouraging lying and deceit?

slimchick · Feb 25, 2011, 05:18 PM

I will tell him right after I receive the results from my friend's test and if it's my bf's baby life goes on like normal if it's not he might leave my *** although I accepted his child