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phpbb3 · Feb 1, 2011, 07:11 AM

I've been sitting staring at this empty box for about 5 minutes, trying to think on what I need to type, how to start. I'm going to use a fake name, let's use Chantal.

I met Chantal a few weeks ago, at the time she was dating another girl. I don't know why, but even upon the first time I met her, I had feelings for her. I don't think it was her physical aspects, as I've never considered her looks to be something I find attractive. I like her for who she is.

Shortly after meeting her, her girlfriend broke up with her. She came to me about how she was feeling, even admitting that she didn't understand why she came to me, she just did. Talking to her was easy, we were able to cover a wide variety of topics, laughing all throughout. She was also able to get serious, when it came to talking about the relationship she had just lost.

She wants to hang out more often, and I want this to become more than just a friendship. She's very open about her sexuality, this lost relartionship being her first, she says she's not sure if she's lesbian or bisexual. Is this a good sign for me? I haven't been in many relationships either. I've been asked out many times and have said no, but Chantal I just feel that I need in my life. She means so much to me.

I'm sorry if I'm ranting, I'm just confused and not at all sure what to do. I really like this girl, and I would do anything for her. I want this to work. Help me?

answerme_tender · Feb 1, 2011, 07:52 AM

This is just my opinion here but I would NOT enter into a romantic relationship just yet with this lady. For no other reason then no one deserves to be anyone's REBOUND!!

I understand you have feelings for her and really want to pursue these, but she is coming from a emotional breakup and is need of comfort. She may very well enter a relationship with you because of that, but most of these types of rebound relationships Don't LAST.

Just continue to be her friend. Besides this gives you BOTH time to really get to know each other without the pressure of any romantic involvement. I do want to add that she may enter into a romantic relationship with someone else as a rebound, but don't panic and make a move to put yourself in that rebound position. Keep in mind those types of relationships have no deep meaning and they don't tend to last.

Take care

SaraHere · Feb 1, 2011, 08:00 AM

Well it looks like you do have a soft spot for the girl but in my opinion she just broke up with her girlfriend and right now needs a friend to make her feel comfy and welcomed I don't think starting a new relationship [for her] is going to make it better I think you should just see where it leads let time fly for a bit obviously if you like her a lot then you have to tell her but for now just stay friends and see where it goes if you make a move straight away it might end badly even though you might get together the relationship may not last.. I hope everything goes well for you and her all the happiness

ironhide262 · Feb 1, 2011, 08:12 AM

She came to you because you had an open ear, a friend to talk to and a shoulder to cry on... that's all. I wouldn't expect much more from this girl than that right now.

I would pump the brakes on this one... the other posters are right... "Rebound" is written all over this.

phpbb3 · Feb 1, 2011, 10:28 AM

Thanks a lot for your advice guys, you're all right, my judgement was just too clouded to see it. Wonderful community here! :)