Human beings think that every animal, every living thing needs contact. That's really not the case. There are many animals that we have as pets that actually don't like to be held, touched, cuddled, or to even have a companion. Hamsters are one of those animals.
Hamster tolerate being held, they don't enjoy it. They don't need companionship, the prefer to be alone, doing their thing, living their lives.
We as humans adopt these animals in the hopes of having a companion. That's not a bad thing, but the thought that he will have a miserable life if he isn't held by you, or petted by you, is not an accurate thought.
I know it's hard to understand. We humans are nurturing animals, we crave touch, we crave companionship, and we cannot understand why many of the animals we've domesticated aren't eager for the same.
You can work with him to get him to accept being held, but for many hamsters it's not possible. Some are more easy going than others. For some it just takes time in patience. For many they will never accept it.
Whenever we've brought a new hamster into our home we let him/her settle for around a week. That means allowing him to explore his new home, get used to his new surroundings, get comfortable with the sounds, actions, and goings on. After a week we (there are 4 people in our family, 2 adults, 2 kids) all sit on the floor, form a circle, to to toe, creating a little wall. We bring the hamster out and place him, and a few treats and toys, in the middle of the circle. Let him explore. Hamsters are very curious little animals. They love to explore new things.
With every hamster we've ever had it usually takes around an hour, sometimes less, for the hamster to approach one of us in the circle. We offer a little treat, and if he stays close to our hand while eating, we'll reach out, try petting. If he moves away we wait until he approaches one of us again.
This is something we do for days, every day, up to an hour or 2. Soon the hamster starts to become more brave, and curious. Holding your hand on the floor with a treat will often entice little hammy to come have a look. If he climbs on your hand to get the treat, just leave your hand on the floor and let him eat. It's a major step.
Once hammy is more tame handling him every day is important.
It takes a lot of patience, and with some hammy's it takes a lot of time.
You'll get there. :)
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