[userdime]

I don't know where to start...

Okay, so I dated this guy 7 months ago for like a month or so, he was very secretive and would only see me once a week. I didn't appreciate it and thought he was up to no good so I confronted him and we stopped talking.

3 weeks ago he emailed me saying he wants to be friends and that he missed me. We met up 3 days later, he suposably fell in love with me since the first time he met me (I think its bs). He asked me to be his GF the second week, I said no then yes. I met his 18 year old sister that he is very close to and he offered to buy me a ring that way I know he is taking me serious. We have been two weeks "together", I work mornings and he works evenings and says he is busy nights. So we see each other once a week and pretty much text all the other time... He doesn't want me to know where he lives because he said he has a restraining order on his ex.

I told him it is not going to work because this is no relationship and we should stay friends but he got all emotional and said I wanted to date other guys. So, I told him we will work on it. I know it is way to soon to expect anything but at this point I don't know what to do since I have not been in this sort of so call relationship...

My question is... What should I be thinking? Cause I am thinking he has someone else and wants me on the side. But when we spent time together it doesn't feel like that. What do you think?

[J_9]

I'm thinking you need to put on your running shoes and run as far away from this person as possible!

Wow, so many red flags!

A ring this soon? Controlling.

Doesn't want you to know where he lives? Controlling AND hiding something.

He got emotional and said you wanted to see other guys? Controlling.

I see nothing more than a potential abusive relatioinship here.

[joypulv]

'He offered to buy me a ring that way I know he's serious.'
I hope you aren't really that naïve. You don't accept a ring from a man with a secret life. The only really meaningful ring is the one in the bull's nose, attached to a rope. The nose is sensitive so you can lead the bull around and he will follow.

[redhed35]

Your gut instinct is telling you something is up here,listen to it and act.

Don't get caught up in emotional blackmail,you don't really know this guy and so far all he is doing to trying to control the 'relationship'.

Time to drop him as fast as you can.

[Jake2008]

I absolutely agree with the above.

For any relationship, if there is no trust, there is nothing. Him being so secretive about his real life, is cause for alarm bells.

The restraining order, if it is against his ex, why should that stop you from going to his home?

That he has not shown you who he is, means he is keeping you a secret, too.

It seems convenient for him to have you once a week, and the ring signifies nothing more than a bribe. Don't fall for it.