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whyme91 · Oct 28, 2010, 02:55 PM

I don't know what to do I turn 19 in less than a couple weeks, I am a virgin, have never been on a date, I am becoming more and more depressed... As a guy with next to no self confidence I will look but just shy away and realize that I have absolutely no hope of ever getting anything, I have been told by the few friends I have that I am not ugly (recently my only friends moved away which has also added to the problems) what can I do because I am just in a vicious circle and it is affecting all aspects of my life.

HaunaBauna · Oct 28, 2010, 03:54 PM

I just couldn't help but feel the need to talk to you you about your feelings... I know its hard to feel like your missing something, but you have to understand you are not the only one going through that and it won't be forever.. I know as humans we always think nothing will ever change, but they will I promise you.. you just have to stay positive and try things you maybe haven't tried before you would be surprised how that raises confidence and helps you to become happier. For instance ask a girl out that your all nervous and worried about asking... you never know! And if she denies you who the heck cares:) there is always more girls out there and there will be one for you I promise you that:) Just don't sit around and wait for it to fall in your lap you need to make some changes in yourself and get your butt in gear and take some risks to get to that next step:) I hope this helped you at all, but please don't get so down on yourself just because your still a virgin that's silly... and it will happen for you... no dbout... good luck hunny. Start tom with some changes you will be amazed what outcomes happen.

mystific · Oct 28, 2010, 06:08 PM

So my first question is, why do you feel you have no self confidence?

Do you play sport?

You need to find something that you feel confident in doing. What makes you happy?

Unfortunately most friends come and go in your life and few will stay with you for what will feel like a lifetime, but it then gives you the opportunity to make new friends and find different aspects in life that maybe you've never seen before. It is the joy of socialising!

Focus on you first. Finding avenues where you feel confident, making yourself happy and sure about life and what direction you'd like to go.. then everything else will fall into place.

Keep your head up!

talaniman · Oct 28, 2010, 08:46 PM

I highly suggest you bury those old feelings, and start to build new ones by overcoming your fears by building a life that you enjoy by doing things that excite you, and getting new friends who do interesting things. Often setting some short term goals to learn new skills or get a new activity will draw you to people who have interest similar to yours.

Instead of wondering what to do, make a plan to do something, so you can change your whole attitude and your outlook, because there is a big world to explore if you just take a step toward it. Maybe all your efforts will not be slam bang successful, but if you keep trying, and never give up on yourself, you will gain confidence and that will attract people to you who want to share your success and happiness with you.

But you have to make that first step for yourself, so love YOURSELF enough to try. Just think of all the people who don't have the choices and options you do, but manage to be happy with what they do have, so don't waste time with be negative just because something has happen to make you sad.

p. s. Nothing wrong with being a virgin, no matter what a nog head says. Its none of there business any way. When its for you it will happen so just have a great time until it does.