[snowangel_247]

Hi
I dated a guy for 6 years and in our 5th year of a relationship he insisted on helping me pay back a student loan because he didn't want me to pay interest on my loan. I didn't want the money nor did I ask for it but he said he loved me and wanted to help me. I told him I wouldn't do business with family or friends. But after a few tries I said OK on the terms I wasn't going to have to pay it back. I accepted the money in cheque form and paid off my student loan. We ended up breaking up in Sept 2008 after 6 years of a seriouis relationship and he is now in the last year been demanding I pay back the money he "let me borrow". I was afraid for my safety and was sick of him coming to my home I did give him 1000.00 to stay away. He left me alone for another year. Now Dec 2010 he is demanding money again. I told him to take me to court as I do not owe him anything as it was a gift and he wanted to help out the one he loved.

If someone could please help me and let me know if I owe him back it would help. I trusted him and accepted. I never thought we would have broken up but we both changed and it was for the better.

TKS!

[ballengerb1]

From what we read you owe him nothing but it's a he said she said if you go to court. The courts will want to know why you gave him the $1k if you did not owe him anything. I would not pay and just sit back and see what developes.

[joypulv]

Court could go either way. I assume that you had nothing in writing. He has the canceled check. It sounds like it was a sizable amount. All that and more would have an effect on a small claims judge.
What puzzles me is why you don't WANT to pay it back. You owed it, and from the sound of how you describe yourself, you don't like to be beholden to anyone. In essence you were bound to his feelings for you and the relationship you had. The right thing to do is to pay it back. I wouldn't pay interest and I would arrange a monthly amount, sent by mail, and he leaves you alone.

[Fr_Chuck]

I would give your friend a little advantage in court, since you paid them the 1000 last year. But at this point you refuse to pay and see if they will actually take you to court.

If you don't owe it, don't agree to pay ( even part of it) by paying on the money he claims was a loan, you are supporting his claiim

[snowangel_247]

HI again thank you for the advice. The only reason I gave him some money was to be left alone. Like I said I was afraid and he kept coming to my home and harassing myself and my mother. He kept calling the house and even went over to my grandmothers home but good thing my uncle was there to ask him to leave. This goes in a bit deeper but I don't want to say too much but the money I gave to him last year was only for him to stay away. I know it hurts my case but I didn't know what to do. He has even told me he is in need of this money and honestly I don't feel I should be giving it to him. He gave it because he wanted to not because I asked. Just like a boyfriend would do to help out the one he loves. There was many times I helped him out with financial issues but never ever held it over his head nor did I ever ask for it back. When I had, I gave. But it doesn't seem right for him to come after me now. I feel he is in need and is coming back to his past for the amount.

I do thank you for your advice.