Ask Experts Questions for FREE Help !
Ask
    Bsugar6969's Avatar
    Bsugar6969 Posts: 11, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Jan 7, 2007, 03:29 PM
    Begging for Money
    Why do people always asking to borrow money!

    If you tell them no! They get mad at you and don't want to be your friend. I feel that we all have jobs but I make more. I don't brag about how much money I make! My friends spend so much money and charging cards are at the max. I give gifts on birthdays and holidays. Sometimes, I don't get any gifts from some of them. I save my money and shop reasonable. My family get upset with me! I did not talk to my sister for two years because she wanted money! I lend money before and they did not pay back! I am not trying to win a contest! I love my fAMILY AND MY MONEY, TOO!
    I am number one! No one is taking care of ME! :confused: :confused: :rolleyes:
    nwsflash's Avatar
    nwsflash Posts: 530, Reputation: 73
    Senior Member
     
    #2

    Jan 7, 2007, 03:57 PM
    There is an old saying " Never lend money to family or friends " what you have put above means when things go wrong it leads to pain and upset. You have every right to look after your money ! And people should respect your views if you say NO, but as for presents and gifts, I was always brought up that it was the giving that counted not the return of gifts.
    Bluerose's Avatar
    Bluerose Posts: 1,521, Reputation: 310
    Ultra Member
     
    #3

    Jan 7, 2007, 04:27 PM
    Some people say that money is the root of all evil. It isn't of course. It's what we do with it that makes all the difference.

    Newsflash said above, “Never lend money to family or friends”. I would like to quote too, “Never a borrower or a lender be”. That's what banks are for.

    "Discretion in all thing." Especially your own finances.

    Put the money you have earned away in a safe place, and don't flaunt the fact that you are earning more than family and friends. Your finances are you business.

    If you go out with friends a kitty is a good idea, you all put in the same amount for the evening.

    I have three grown children and some are better off than others. My youngest (my daughter) had rather a large phone bill and one of her brothers offered to help but I stepped in and said no because she needs to learn how to manage her own money and cut down on her phone calls. They didn't fall out with each other - or with me, because it made sense.

    Make those gifts just little token gifts… Take care not to 'out do them' on the gift scene making it difficult for them to keep up with you.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #4

    Jan 7, 2007, 10:38 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Bsugar6969
    Why do people always asking to borrow money!!
    Because many people are cheap and irresponsible with money.



    Quote Originally Posted by Bsugar6969
    If you tell them no!! They get mad at you and don't want to be your friend.
    Then they are not really your friend

    Quote Originally Posted by Bsugar6969
    I feel that we all have jobs but I make more. I don't brag about how much money I make!! My friends spend so much money and charging cards are at the max. I give gifts on birthdays and holidays. Sometimes, I don't get any gifts from some of them.

    See, they are not your friends.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bsugar6969
    I save my money and shop reasonable. My family get upset with me!! I did not talk to my sister for two years because she wanted money!!

    Your better to have her out of your life even if she is your sister. Make her learn that you will not be walked on. It’s a valuable lesson that does not come with a price tag.

    Quote Originally Posted by Bsugar6969
    I lend money before and they did not pay back! I am not trying to win a contest!! I love my fAMILY AND MY MONEY, TOO!
    I am number one!! No one is taking care of ME!!:confused: :confused: :rolleyes:
    I agree with you. If they are irresponsible and only see you as dollar signs then you need to pull away from them. If you love them you will teach them not to use you.

    Hey can I borrow 20 bucks? Just kidding. :D
    jennymyluv's Avatar
    jennymyluv Posts: 9, Reputation: 2
    New Member
     
    #5

    Jan 12, 2007, 11:47 AM
    Well, if you ask me... I think you are a GIVER... Givers are GREAT... and everybody loves a Giver... I think many people like to manipulate and make you feel bad when your actually the good guy!! Don't fall into that their manipulative mindset... yes, isn't it funny how people get angry when the nice Giver doesn't feel like giving anymore... Trust and know there is nothing wrong with choosing not to give... as long as you know your own heart... then don't worry about it!! Smile... and say... they are the ones with the problems... Trust me... if I could... I would give to my friends and family all that I have or even give them the world... (See my heart is good) but that's just not being very practicle... Keep giving gifts... if you don't get any back... I think God sees all that you do and will bless u..! Family is sooooooooo hard to deal with... Worry about yourself... live your life being happy... keep giving things such as compliments... smiles... hugs... good friendships... your heart... (note money is not on the list) (:;)
    chippers's Avatar
    chippers Posts: 440, Reputation: 88
    Full Member
     
    #6

    Jan 13, 2007, 10:57 AM
    I've been in that situation many, many times with my parents. Especially my mother. Money would flow through her fingers like sand through an hour glass. She thought I owed her for all she spent raising me. I'd given her pay check after pay check because I was afraid of what would happen to her if certain bills weren't paid. Then a brick hit me(litterally) that Iwasn't helping her but hindering her. She needed to find her own way out and grow up a little. You need to realize that you aren't an ATM where your friends and stick a card in your mouth and out comes the cash. You owe no one anything nor are you obligated to your family. (if you borrowed then you are obligated to pay the back)
    I hope you didn't mean you love money but rather respect it. That's evident by the fact you spend responsibly and save it. You work hard for it and earn every penny. No can expect you to pay their way. How many people have asked to "borrow" and have yet to pay you back. More importantly how scarce are they when you ask to be repaid.
    If your "friends" expect gifts then they are only with you for what you can give them. The fact they give no such consideration should tell you to look for new friends.
    Your money is you own business and no one else's. You are under no obligation to tell anyone(except the IRS) what you make. In my case the agency I worked for mailed my checks to my house and my mother would open then before I came home. Keep it all private and lend to no one. Because you need to put yourself first. Illness and other circumstances can clean you out faster than running a vacuum over cookie crumbs.
    Taukame's Avatar
    Taukame Posts: 92, Reputation: 26
    Junior Member
     
    #7

    Jan 13, 2007, 11:08 AM
    Here's the really strange thing about people who borrow from you, if you don't give them whatever it is they are asking for, amazingly, they still wind up all right. Don't let people guilt you into lending. Sometimes, you have to ask them, and ask yourself what would they do if they didn't know you.
    I let a relative stay with me, supposedly, until he got hisself together, and he said that he would repay me as soon as he found a job, not rent or anything, just help the utilities. Well, guess what, he never got a job. When I told him he had to leave, I think he was homeless for about five minutes. This kind of people always manage to land on their feet. He found somebody else to live with
    They will always find a way to manage.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #8

    Jan 13, 2007, 12:40 PM
    Check this out. This just happened last night. Well first let me give a little back story. I just moved into this condo and directly across from me it this drunk Glenn. Glenn has no car and seems to be intoxicated every time I see him. This other guy Mark used to drive him around and drink with him but he just moved last Saturday. So all week he's been harassing me to come drink with him which I did once last Sunday. Since then he won't leave me alone.

    Well last night at 4 am my doorbell starts ringing. Then I hear pounding and as I got my thoughts together I realized it was my place. So I look through the peep hole and I see what I thought was a police car out in the drive. So as I debate if I should even answer this Glenn sticks his head in the peep hole and rings the doorbell again. I open the doorbell and it turns out the "police car" was really a taxi. I look Glenn right in the face, who I've only known for a week mind you, and avoid the friendly hellos and say "IT'S F***ING 4 AM, IS MY PLACE ON FIRE?"

    Glenn, drunk and smelling incredibly bad of smoke says that he doesn't have any money and needs to borrow $20.00 to pay the cab. I've known him for a week. So my wallet was on the table right next to the door and I just gave it too him. Now this afternoon I'm clear headed and wish that I wouldn't even answered the door. I just thought I'd share my story since it fits this thread.

Not your question? Ask your question View similar questions

 

Question Tools Search this Question
Search this Question:

Advanced Search

Add your answer here.


Check out some similar questions!

Money [ 4 Answers ]

How do I get money? Since I do not any?

Help me guys... I'm begging! [ 6 Answers ]

Ok, here's how it goes. I had dated my boyfriend for about a year, and things were usually very good between us. I loved him, still do, more than anything. But I let some of my fears get in the way, and get the best of me. The relationship ended and I am completely devastated. I know what I did...

Money is there any? [ 1 Answers ]

Want to see the Federal Reserve bank president of New York admit that there is no "money"? On June 12th watch the Travel channel and see for yourself! Get your VCRs, Tivo, and all other recording devices ready!! ...

Money-- what do I do with it? [ 7 Answers ]

I am about to receive 25,000.00 dollars.I want to use it/invest to make it grow quickly but I have no idea where to begin.Any suggestions?:confused:

Money [ 1 Answers ]

Hi I am 23 years old I live in the countryside in South Australia, I have a girlfriend that I have been seeing for a year and 8 months I really want to win some money to get a house together, I would like to know if I will win a lot or some money to buy a house in the near future if you could tell...


View more questions Search