[13sldr]

So here is some background about my question before I ask it.

I moved up to Fairbanks, Ak back in May of 2009. Started working at the Fitness Center at the Air Force Base up here. I was working with this really cute female. We became friends, she had a boy friend and I was leaving for Basic in Nov. So we never though of each other in any other way than just friends. I shippped out to basic, obvioulsy we didn't talk then. We kept in touch all through Tech School(or specific job training). I got my first assignment. Got to my base, meet someone after being there for a few months. Around July I decided I was going to come back up to Ak. For Thanksgiving to see my family and friends up here! Once I told Kim(thats the girls name I meet while I was living in Ak) she asked if we could hang out when I got back. And I agreeed to it.

I got back up here about a week and a half ago from today. Ever since then me and Kim have been texting like crazy! She has been giving me little hints that she "likes" me i.e. she has called me babe a couple of times, she has bascialy ask me to cuddle with her (no sexual innuendo intended). She has invited me over to her house a few times at like 1100pm then realizing its probably a bad a idea, again no sexual innuendo intended. And just things like that. So we go on our "date"/hang out last night! I pick her up at her house at like 400pm. Talk with her mom for a minute, she just asked me how I am liking my Firstbase and what not. We finally leave and head to walmart since we had some time to kill, we walked around the store for like 30-45 minutes. Just talking. We leave go to the movie, about half way through I figure I should reach for her hand and see what happens, and sure enough, she doesn't reject me, she goes with it. Movie ends, I take her home. She texts me about 30mins later to make sure I made it home safetly. And we continue to talk from there. As we are texting she asks me why I held her hand, I told her it felt like the right thing to do. Ask her if she didn't like that I did it, she said no she did. We keep texting she was getting tired so I suggested she goes to sleep since it was late and she was tired, she said no, not unless I was there!

As I mentioned earlier, I have a GF back home. I didn't tell her about last night, felt no need to, she didn't ask so I didn't tell. I have been with Whit for about 2 months now, Things are great! I like her, she likes me! Although I don't really see us going anywhere I don't want to break it off just yet, I want things to play out and see what happens. And I am kind of using this as a learning experience, to learn even more about myself since I am so young. Oh and Whit is 24, I am 20. So we are both looking for different things, She is ready to settle down, I don't really know what I want, I am young I have my whole life adead of me... We both understand that we probably won't be together forever and we are both fine with that. And like I said I don't want to break it off yet, so I can let it play out and see what happens and to learn more about myself since this realationship is different from the other two I had so this will be a great learning expericance!

As I was talking to my Buddies about Kim. They told me to have sex with her. Reason being, not so I just get with another girl. But to share a special time with each other since there is really no hope for us, since she lives here in Ak and is going to college next year. And well I am in the AF and stationed in Nm. And I can see what they are saying but at the same time I don't want to do it because I am kind of hoping that just maybe we will cross paths later in life...

So should I do it, should I not? Should I just break up with Whit even though everything is going goood? Any Advice that can just help?
Thanks in advance and Happy Thanksgiving!

[Jake2008]

You are using this girl, to gain experience? You are keeping the fact that you already have a relationship a secret, so you can just play the new gal for all its worth?

You need experience all right, starting with a little respect for both women.

If you are in a serious relationship already, you have no business 'experimenting' with another woman whatsoever. You are cheating on your girlfriend, and using this girl. I doubt she would be interested in you, if you were honest with her.

It just isn't okay to use people, and that is what you are doing. As long as you figure you can get away with keeping one in the dark, while using the other who doesn't really know what you're up to, or that you are already involved with someone, you are playing with fire.

You can't justify what you are doing. Using people, for whatever purpose, is just plain wrong.

You have a lot of growing up to do, and I hope you learn along the way, that women aren't 'experiments', and shouldn't be used to satisfy your curiosity.

I hope that both women will find out what you are really up to, and what kind of person you are, and dump your sorry a**.

[13sldr]

First of, No where did I say I was using Whit for sex seeing as how that's is how you are taking it! We are not in a serious relationship! Again we both realize we probably won't be together in the future for the long hall! But I don't want to break it off cause I want to see what happens, I want things to play out! This relationship will be a learning experance however! (And not sexual either Sir!) I am young and have a lot to learn about myself and relationships, so if we date for the next 6 months a decided to go our separate ways and I just so happen to have learned something from it DOES NOT MEAN I used her period!

As for Kim. I am not "Playing her for all its worth!" She is a great friend and could possible be more should our paths cross down the line in our lifes!

You need to reread the post before responding again! Thank you