[rubydolan]

Hi my daughter is 5 she was going with her dad but now for the past 4 months she won't go I made her go for few hours on a sat but wouldn't leave her home when I asked so I stopped access because I couldn't trust him to take her and leave her back he pays 20 euro a week now he wants guardianship which I don't want him to have as he has never done anything for her since she was born he only started paying for her cause the court ordered him to I do every thing for her he does nothing never has the only reason he doing this is cause his mother wants access not him he hasn't looked for her at al he doing this because I got engaged can I stop him from getting this

[AK lawyer]

You are in Europe?

[rubydolan]

I am in ireland

[ScottGem]

First, A dad doesn't need guardianship. Guardianship occurs when someone other than the bio or legal parents wants to care for a child.

Second you don't say whether there is any court ordered visitation schedule or rights. If there is you can't withhold the child. If you do you could be cited for contempt of court.

Has you daughter explained why she doesn't want to go? Why not just let her go to grandma?

[rubydolan]

There is no court order we decided ourselves that she would go at weekends that was going OK till the last few months when she said she didn't want to stay over just go for few hours but he wasn't happy with that so when she would go he wouldn't take her back till the next evening and woulnt answer his fone to me that happened a few times so then I told him he needed to go get proper access sorted cause he wouldn't leave her back when I asked him,she has not said why she doesn't want to stay just that she will go with him if he will leave her home be for dark but he doesn't so she doesn't want to go now cause she doesn't trust him to leave her home when he says he will plus there is problems with his dad who he lives with were as he was in court for indecent exposure twice a few years ago so I don't allow her to go there and am afraid that sumit happened that she doesn't want to go,his mother is as bad I had her on fone calling me every thing for stoping her going the gaurds had to get her to stop ringing she would arrive at my house shouting abuse so she not sum one I want with her either its just a mess I have to do what I feel is best for her and I don't think him getting guardianship is good for her because he will feel then he can do what he wants and il be worried sick ervey time she goes in case she near his dad

[ScottGem]

Well without any court ordered custody or visitation he actually has EQUAL rights to her and he can keep her for as long as he wants.

And again, guardianship is the wrong term here. You should go to court to establish primary physical custody before he does.

[rubydolan]

I was told by solicitor that he has no rights cause we not married and that I am sole guardian and that he has to take her back when I say un less he goes and gets access order from court say,n other wise

[ScottGem]

Ok, I take back what I said. Apparently, Ireland's laws are not friendly towards fathers of chidlren born out of wedlock. I found this site: Legal guardianship and unmarried couples that explains this.

So, yes, you currently have sole guardianship (which IS the correct term) and he would have to go to court to get joint guardianship (in the US we call this custody and guardianship is a different thing). He would then have to prove that joint guardianship is in the best interests of the child.

Whether he can prove that or not is the question. The fact that he has an ongoing relationship with the child is a very large point in his favor.

[rubydolan]

Yeah that's the problem but am worried that sumit happened that she doesn't want to go and if I say any thingg to him about his dad he just says the family doesn't want to discuss it so I can't find out any thing from him so I think I will just have to take my chances in court and hope for the best thanks a mill for your help and advise apprecite it thank you

[ScottGem]

I do think you really need to get a reason from your daughter.