[march1986]

My boyfriend of 1.5 years was an amazing guy for most of our relationship he would hold me every night, kiss me and say I love you all the time he wanted to be with me. He is on 600 mg of triliptol everyday but it doesn't seem to be working anymore. Within the last few days he has become extremely mean. Last night he told me that he wants me to sleep in the living room because he wants to be alone. He would say stuff like "i'm gonna be a **** to you all day" I would ask why and he would say because I can. He constantly says "we're are over" but then be very loving an hour or so later. Sometimes I ask him to hold me at night, which I didn't have to do before, and he says "NO!" and his reason is "cause I'm a whore". I haven't been with anyone besides him and I never even talk to other guys. What can I do to get our relationship back.

[Clemintine]

Depending on the severity of his condition, if his medication isn't working anymore then you won't be the only one to notice. Unless he doesn't go outside? I don't know if he works or not or sees his family or a doc regularly or anything but they would have noticed by now for sure. If nobody else has noticed after spending a fair amount of time with him, then consider the possibility he might be faking all of this for some reason... If his meds have really stopped levelling his moods out he can't be controlling them around everyone but you.
There isn't much else you can do but urge him to see his doc soon... you can't turn yourself into a neurotransmitter and float into his brain and restore the chemical imbalance there! The best thing is to be there for him and with him.
Have you brought up how he's been acting in the times when he is loving? How does he respond to talking about it when in that mood? Or does it send him into a worse state?
To get your relationship back to a healthy state I'd say urge him to see his doc and if he doesn't want too... then you shouldn't put yourself through his torture. He might turn back into a nice guy some of the time but there's only so long a person can handle being called a whore by the person you love ):
Good luck!

[dhuber]

Are you sure you want it back? I am a therapist and treat bipolar. Although mania or depression can make one irritable it doesn't give someone a license to treat you like crap! If he is experiencing mood swings or irritability he should call his provider immediatetly. You should be in a relationship that involves trust, fidelity, honesty and caring. If he needs his meds changed, get them changed. When you decide you have had enough of being treated like crap , bipolar or not, leave. If he cared that much he would care about the interactions between you two as a couple. Don't blame this on disorder. Maybe you can really try to get through how harmful his behavior is to you, but after that let him deal with his disorder alone

[march1986]

Thanks for your help he is doing a lot better now and found that his doctor took him off a different medicine. He didn't think to tell me about that! I will be going to his appointments now so if there are instances like that or if I have concerns I can ask about them. Once again thanks for your advice. This site is sooo helpful

[Clemintine]

Awesome it's nice to hear things worked out for you two :D