[Clinton01]

Hey guys, lately I've been through cycles of anger and depression. (btw I'm 18, 200lbs) I think that I can identify why, but I feel helpless because I can't do anything about it. I'm turning into a loner and I can't stop the progression. I think that I'm fairly normal besides the distinct lack of a real social life, and I'm more traditional. I know what style I fit into for clothes, no nerdy s#!& or anything bizarre. I know all about modern society, many people being manipulated and misguided by their tricks and tactics. Besides that... I've only had one close friend, and we're pretty tight and we almost act the same and have the same interests, and we're socially impaired. We can't hang out as much since I moved a little ways away and since he's still in high school. But it has always been just us - no one else in our friend group. That's it. I have another close friend who is 'normal', and he doesn't understand my social dilemma since he's never been there. We hang out and drink together sometimes, with his friends too, but I'm not really close to him. He's just someone I hang around. Other than that. I have no other friends. At work, everyone else knows each other, but I hardly know anyone. I try and talk to them but they always seem to stay at surface level conversation with me. I still have to wait and see about people in my college classes since I haven't started my major classes yet. But before, in trade school I talked with nearly everybody all the time, we all knew each other really well, but I never made the steps to do stuff after class. So yeah, other than that I got nothing. I get angry or depressed when I see friend groups and couples in public, I'm really jealous that they get to do that and I never get to. I feel so out of place in society and I feel like I have no one to hang out with half the time. I think that I'm just too quiet, or people really don't want to be around me. I'm also starting to get scared because I haven't had a real girlfriend yet, in the sense that I need more experience so I can eventually find someone I'll be happy with.

The anger and depression is becoming regular, on a weekly basis now I feel like trash. It sucks hardcore. I feel so hopeless sometimes that I'll always be disliked and miserable, and that I'll always be a loner.

[UntilTheEnd]

I know how you're feeling dude. I feel exactly the same. I used to be able to be happy by myself but lately I'm tired and just depressed. I think we've got a case of the winter blues or something. Plus do you exercise? It's a great way of feeling better, and plus you ll look better for the girls :). You can always give me a message or something if you need someone to talk to.

[YeloDasy]

I am sorry you are feeling so down. I want to commend you for knowing what is getting you down and wanting to make things better!
You said that you have an idea of why you are cycling, what is your interpretation? Is it all the things in your post, or do you think it is more inside of yourself that you want to look at?