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    celes729's Avatar
    celes729 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Oct 16, 2010, 09:55 PM
    Is he gay as well.
    Ok so I'm a 17 year old boy with a crush on this guy and he has girlfriend and all but he just seems so gay with me... let me explain why. BTW everyone thinks I'm straight in school so I hide it well.

    - First of all him and his girlfriend seem really distant. They never touch or really communicate whenever I see them. And I am good friends with both of them so I find it weird. And a lot of people say it is as well

    - We joke around a ton and in a way that he only does it with me. He does fake voices and we sing songs jokingly to each other. He labeled a song "our song" as well.

    - He is always looking at me when he seems me. When I look over he smiles and we keep eye contact going for a bit of time and we just smile.

    - Recently we had a long bus trip and we were on coach buses and me and him were on the floor cause it was more comfortable and he called me over cause he wanted to talk. So we talked for awhile and we were on the floor and he was really close to me when he had more room. He kept singing me songs and pretending to do sexual things with me such as moan things like ah suck it suck it harder in a joking way and I was really close to it. And he kept teasing me with his feet and such.

    - Most things I do make him laugh even when they aren't funny sometimes.

    - Every time a girl says she loves me and I say it back he says stop it you love me more.

    - He never discusses women. If I bring up what has he done with a woman he just sort of nods it off and say I don't want to talk about it.

    - And in general he just always gets really happy when he sees me.

    Do you think its just boys messing around or is he secretly gay... and if so do you think I should send him more signals I'm interesed?
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
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    #2

    Oct 17, 2010, 10:16 AM

    I think you're both in the closet, and that's fine and well, if that's what you feel for now, but if he is in a "relationship" for whatever reason, you better step back, and stop dreaming.

    It would seem to me with all that camaraderie between you, that you would have talked honestly with each other while you are having all that secret fun, before you get the idea of cheating, or judging what he is doing.

    Find out what the facts of the matter are as he may be bisexual, and that opens up a whole new dialog as far as your concerned.

    Your actions so far are based on your feelings, but you have NO facts to build on.
    Fr_Chuck's Avatar
    Fr_Chuck Posts: 81,301, Reputation: 7692
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    #3

    Oct 17, 2010, 12:30 PM

    And thus problems of being in the closet, you can't just be yourself and be public with who you are.

    So take a risk and ask him or not, it is your choice
    Devorameira's Avatar
    Devorameira Posts: 2,461, Reputation: 981
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    #4

    Oct 17, 2010, 01:09 PM

    It does seem like he may be on the same page you are, but it's really impossible to know for sure.

    You appear to be great friends, so why not just straight out ask him?
    Alty's Avatar
    Alty Posts: 28,317, Reputation: 5972
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    #5

    Oct 17, 2010, 01:16 PM

    He may be gay or bi, but obviously he's not ready to come out either way. He's with someone, and he hasn't made it clear to you that he's interested in you.

    It seems that both of you are playing games, and I'm sure the thought of telling him how you feel and facing possible rejection or worse, is terrifying.

    Do you think he knows that you're gay? Is that possible? Do you think it would bother him if you came out to him?

    That's something to think about. Maybe he's not being more direct because he's not sure what page you're on.
    beachloverjohn's Avatar
    beachloverjohn Posts: 491, Reputation: 242
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    #6

    Oct 17, 2010, 03:24 PM

    Yeah, this guy is either gay or is really messing with your head. And if this guy is "secretly gay", well that secret is about as well hidden as the world is really round.

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