[jenniepepsi]

I guess I just don't see the issue. But I have amish family, and they are extreamly strict as well, perhaps I am used to the rules of gender and life.

[J_9]

I'm sorry, but I'm going to be very blunt here and I don't want you to take it wrong... bear with me okay?

I think you are overstepping your boundaries. These are HIS children and he has the right to raise them as he sees fit. Had you come up to me in a restaurant and confronted me about my parenting skills, I'm not so sure I would be as kind as he was.

Leave him AND his girls alone. He's already made it clear that he does not want them to visit you. Why in the world would you want to bring them to your house to discuss their PRIVATE life with your daughter. They don't know you.

From what I have read it appears that you are a nosy busy body trying to butt into the lives of other people.

I'm also concerned about the way you talk to your daughter about abuse. Yes, it happens, but discussing it with a child the way you posted here, is potentially damaging to her psyche.

If you don't like his behavior, visit the restaurant on another night, or find another place to eat. It's as simple as that.

Don't call his wife... Don't visit their school... Don't invite his children to your house.

[Anopersuser]

What is wrong with me discussing abuse with my daughter? Shall I say it's a funny thing? It's better to talk with her about the issue, and let her cry when she needs.

[J_9]

How old is your daughter?

Does she ask you questions about child abuse or do you discuss it with her after you see reports on the news?

[Anopersuser]

Amish live like 200 years ago. He lives like other in the modern world. It's his children, but what makes me so sad is him shouting at two crying girls who do everything they can to obey their strict father. What will they remember from childhood?

[J_9]

Anopersuser,

Amish are still around today, not all are as strict as they once were, but they still thrive.

Why don't you just face the fact that he is a strict parent and leave them alone?

[88sunflower]

Amish live like 200 years ago. He lives like other in the modern world. it's his children, but what makes me so sad is him shouting at two crying girls who do everything they can to obey their strict father. What will they remember from childhood?

Amish are alive and thriving where I live. I sit here at my dest at work and watch them every single day. I have even watched them tie horses to my dumpster so they can walk downtown. If you doubt this I can easily take a picture daily and post them. I am surrounded by them. I went to college with an Amish girl who broke away from her family. She did say they were strict and never much discussed it.

I guess I am glad you noticed this behavior. But I am so surprised the girls opened up like that to you. My thoughts are if he is that strict why would they open up to talk to a total stranger about personal things so easily? Heck I would be more worried about that! Stranger danger. If my son ever sat and talked like that to a total stranger I would not be happy.

[Anopersuser]

She turned 12 years old earlier this year. Mostly if she asks questions, but sometimes we feel we need to talk with her about more serious issues, things that should not just exist in the world, but sadly does. Even I cried some tears

[Anopersuser]

In which way are Amish strict? I'm pretty sure he's not an Amish, just a very strict upper class father who doesn't understand being too strict can damage his daughter's emotions.

[Anopersuser]

My theory is that as he'd just been so mad at them, they had probably almost nothing left to loose (he would already shout at them as much he could at home) and saw it as a last chance to let some other people know more about his strictness.

[88sunflower]

Amish live like 200 years ago. He lives like other in the modern world. it's his children, but what makes me so sad is him shouting at two crying girls who do everything they can to obey their strict father. What will they remember from childhood?

In which way are Amish strict? I'm pretty sure he's not an Amish, just a very strict upper class father who doesn't understand being too strict can damage his daughter's emotions.

How strict he chooses to be is for him to decide. How the public reacts is for the rest of us to decide. I am sure I wouldn't like watching that either. But at the same time I am sure last time I had my son out to eat people weren't happy watching me either when I yanked him by his jacket to get his butt in line. There could be reasons for this and how he is raising his girls. What nationality are they? If they have been going there for so long I feel if it were serious then others would have stepped in. If it were suspected abuse cases child protective services could have already been called. Maybe they were and you don't know it. Your basing concerns on one sighting every week. Although it doesn't sound like something I would want to witness either I think its one of those times you need to research more on the family before you jump the gun.

[J_9]

Personally Sunny, I don't think she needs to research more on the family. This is already creepy enough. She needs to just let them live their lives separate from hers.

[88sunflower]

One more thought I am having is didn't you have one bit of concern that they would be scolded for talking with a stranger? If he left the restaurant after you talked with them I am taking a wild guess that those girls got a good talking to in the car. You didn't do anything wrong for showing concern. But its been so long now that you have watched it all you had to do was talk with your daughter about how different we all are. Every person out there has an opinion on what's right and wrong. This could be a good time to teach her that. What is right for him to teach is girls is wrong for you.

[Anopersuser]

Our daughter already knows people have different opinions, but there are some things that at least 99 % of all people think are not OK, and among them are probably shouting at little girls for misstakes, even when they start crying.

[Anopersuser]

I wish we could live separate, but I think it's important to react sometimes, as long as I follow the laws of the government..

[J_9]

I wish we could live separate, but I think it's important to react sometimes, as long as I follow the laws of the government..

I think this could border on stalking if you aren't careful.

[Anopersuser]

I know some waitress girls have been upset. I don't know sure, but weren't many 19th century-early 20th century upper class daughters raised very strict? One reason would be that people feel proud, sometimes over-proud, when their kids behave well.

[J_9]

I get it now, you aren't in the United States, that's why you didn't understand about the Amish.

Where I live many parents are very strict. We also don't go into such detail with our children about child abuse.

I truly hope, for the sake of those girls, that you did not get them in trouble by talking to them while their father was away.

Why can't you just leave them alone now?

[Anopersuser]

Restaurants are public places. I would not sneak outside their house.

[Anopersuser]

I know who the Amish is (a Christian group in the northern parts of the USA, and in Canada, where many live like 200 years ago). I'm in the Western World, but I don't say exactly where, for the girls sake. How are parents strict where you live?