[burtyjim]

Well I was 16 when I first met my first love. I met her at a party she was my brothers girlfriends sister we got on really well with each other and we talked for ages every day a year went past and we both really liked each other so I asked her out she said yes and it made me so happy we were going out for 9 months and there where the best 9 months in my life and we where best of friends we did everything together not a day went by without talking but one day she decide that she wanted a brake with broke my heart we dident talk for a few days then she rang me to say its over I dident know what to do with myself I cry every night its been 3 months since it happened and I still can't get over it I still talk to her but not as much as I did as well as losing my girlfriend I have lost my best friend and as my brother is now engaged to be married to her sister and I can't not see her now and then it really hurts please help what can I do I'm dying in side

[talaniman]

Those first loves are rough and most times for no reason the end with a lot of emotion on both sides. No one is right or wrong but the feelings of loss is very real. Your problem is you have no way of knowing how to deal with this loss and what to do about the hurt feelings. A good start is to accept this relationship is over, and it is no ones fault. Next you must do the things you enjoyed before you met her and get out and be with friends and concentrate on school and hobbies and sports. It may seem like it now but it is not the end of the world and time will make the hurt seem less as you get busy and enjoy your youth. Trust me there will be many girlfriends in your future and a lot of fun times for sure so don't get stuck over the first of many.

[burtyjim]

Thanks very much yer I will try but I still find it hard she said to me there is nothing wrong with you you treat me great and your really nice so what does that mean good guys come last ?

[talaniman]

thanks very much yer i will try but i still find it hard she said to me there is nothing wrong with u you treat me great and your really nice so what does that mean good guys come last ?

No it means life can be rough sometimes as well as unfair, but it does move on. You have to move on with it.

[burtyjim]

Yer I see thanks mate that does help

[richsaha2007]

thanks very much yer i will try but i still find it hard she said to me there is nothing wrong with u you treat me great and your really nice so what does that mean good guys come last ?

I understand what you are going through. I have went through the same situation. I was hurt as well, but I learned that I have to move on, meet other girls. When I did that I forgot my ex's name. The only reason why I believe a girl would turn down a good guy is either he is to soft or she has her eye on someone else.
The term good guys come last means that good guys are too soft and passive. Girls likes guys who takes control and run the relationship. Just don't over due it. Also, you have to stay mysterious in your personality. The biggest turn off is when your girl knows everything about you. A mysterious personality keeps them coming back for more. Believe me I know.

[Geoffersonairplane]

Tal has said it best and really listen to his advice.. It is the best way forward for you.

I wanted to point out that it is important to realise the difference between a good guy and a nice guy.

There is a difference.

You can be a good guy but that does not mean that you need to be exceptionally nice. I consider myself a good guy yet experience in the last 10 years has taught me some hard lessons where I have been the one taken advantage of and yes, in some ways used because of those qualities. I have learned the difference between nice and good.

Be true to yourself, do not become anything other than who you really are. Don't become cynical in thinking that good guys finish last. If you are true to yourself and to other people then you are the winner already. It is such a great feeling to be who you are, know who are and love who you are. It makes the rough seem a little smoother. Nobody can take that away from you unless you let them...

I know that sounds a bit deep but it really made a lot of sense to me when I started to discover the world. I am not saying I am fully experienced and I still am learning and growing. This was your first real love and there will be many more but please, please, don't change who you are and fall into the delusion that being good gets you nowhere in life.

You will be fine, and will have many good things happen in your life.. Yes there will also be bad and that is life but you will have many, many happy times ahead of you.. I promise!!

Happy New Year to you!!

[burtyjim]

Thanks to all that posted right I dident let her know everything and I did run the relationship but I will take all that you said but 1 more thing to ask I like all that romantic stuff I loved to spoil her take her to meals buy her any thing is that the right thing to do? Thanks post bk and a happy new year 2 you 2 I guess I'm happy as her as a friend then not in my life at all

[s_cianci]

I know it's not easy but you've got to accept the fact that it's over and move on. Live your life and do what's right for you. You may have to see her occasionally and that's OK. When you do, let her see that you're happy and doing well. Make her realize what she's lost.

[burtyjim]

Thanks

[jacob 18]

My good man I'm 18 a senior at my high skool, I just brok up with the love of my live we had been dating 4 alomist 2 years, we did everyhting... we went to eurpe went to orlando, concerts you name it... towards the end it became sour... soo I decided to leave her... at the beginig it was hard talking about her, I later found out that she found someone else... it hurt but after 2 months I can say I'm happy and I'm over her... best advice I can give you is occcupy yourself... distract yourself... go out meet other girls... ur only 16... by the time you get 2 my age you will laug your off... look I know it hurts and every time you see her you get a knot in your stomach... I know dude... look me and my ex won best couple in the year book and 2 add insult 2 injury she's in my firstt 2 periods... but what you have 2 do is first lose all contact... get rid of all her gifts / memories it will make it easier... dn't tlk to her... smile be happy... listen 2 your favorite rock band... n the best advice start working out... n finally tlk 2 your old man... belief me my old man help out a lot when my relaitonship cam eot an end... take long walks and before you know it the pain will cease... hit me bak ill give all the advice you need bother... later...

[talaniman]

Wow since this is a very old post I hope he has gotten it together and is happy.

[misse4eva]

Well first of all she didn't love you because if she did she would have never broke your heart. It wasn't meant to be... theres better girls out there that would never hurt you... you just haven't found her yet... It takes time to heal but don't let her make you feel bad because you did nothing wrong.

[burtyjim]

Hey thanks for the help its has been a while I'm over it had a few girlfriend since then loveing life atm I'm single but loveing it still see her best of friends and that's how I like it