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    gabmd's Avatar
    gabmd Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #1

    Dec 21, 2006, 06:01 PM
    After a GREAT first date...
    I had a GREAT first date with a guy on Tuesday night. We kept it simple - coffee for an hour and a half. There was never a lull in the conversation, no awkwardness at all. The date ended nicely with him telling me that "next time I will get you more than coffee". I walked away feeling great and wanting another date. I am very interested!

    However - I didn't get a follow-up from him yesterday, which unnerved me. So at about 4 in the afternoon, I sent him a simple text message: "I just wanted to thank you again for the coffee last night. I had a great time!" in about 4 minutes, I got a response: "You're welcome. It was fun."

    Not much to go on, huh? And I haven't heard from him as of yet, today.

    Is he playing it cool, or is he blowing me off? I know he is busy - he runs his own business - but he is the one that pursued me in the first place.

    What is the standard for a call back? I am kind of new to this dating thing after being divorced. Anyone? Anyone?
    aduckart's Avatar
    aduckart Posts: 32, Reputation: 6
    Junior Member
     
    #2

    Dec 22, 2006, 07:21 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by gabmd
    I had a GREAT first date with a guy on Tuesday night. We kept it simple - coffee for an hour and a half. There was never a lull in the conversation, no awkwardness at all. The date ended nicely with him telling me that "next time I will get you more than coffee". I walked away feeling great and wanting another date. I am very interested!

    However - I didn't get a follow-up from him yesterday, which unnerved me. So at about 4 in the afternoon, I sent him a simple text message: "I just wanted to thank you again for the coffee last night. I had a great time!" in about 4 minutes, I got a response: "You're welcome. It was fun."

    Not much to go on, huh? And I haven't heard from him as of yet, today.

    Is he playing it cool, or is he blowing me off? I know he is busy - he runs his own business - but he is the one that pursued me in the first place.

    What is the standard for a call back? I am kind of new to this dating thing after being divorced. Anyone? Anyone?
    The kicker is... guys don't have standards for call backs. There are some that will call you minutes after they drop you off at your house and there are others who will call you three days later.

    Based on his comments (and him pursuing you first), I would say he sounds like he is still interested in seeing you again... but remember, if you want the guy to take the lead, it will always be on his time. Give it a few days and if you don't hear from him, give him a call and suggest a movie on you, or something of the sort. That way you don't look pushy to see him again but he still knows you have an interest.

    It's tough! Good Luck! :)
    BIM's Avatar
    BIM Posts: 245, Reputation: 50
    Full Member
     
    #3

    Dec 22, 2006, 07:51 AM
    As hard as it may seem, you need to keep it slow. You made contact and thanked him and that is all you should do until he contacts you next.

    Guys are weird that way, it seems they get all preoccupied with stuff and then you may cross their mind and then they'll call you. If he owns his own business, he is probably pretty busy. You will need to be patient.

    Good luck.
    talaniman's Avatar
    talaniman Posts: 54,327, Reputation: 10855
    Expert
     
    #4

    Dec 22, 2006, 07:16 PM
    Patients, and I hope you have a life where you are doing things that you enjoy and are happy without his input. Many have made the mistake of moving to fast, and giving up there own life and making this new partner their life. Not good in the long run. Make sure you go slow, and get to know each other, and keep a balance in your life between a partner and your own life.
    chuff's Avatar
    chuff Posts: 3,397, Reputation: 1235
    Ultra Member
     
    #5

    Dec 22, 2006, 08:20 PM
    It's the holidays. I'm sure he's focused on other things right now. He may not call until after January 1st.

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