[Kia]

I started dating a new a guy for a little over a month ago. It was hot & heavy during the first couple weeks, and then we got into little spats, ad he stopped calling as much and then for about a week didn't call at all. I found out a few days ago that I was pregnant and I told him. He said he did not want to keep it. I guess I understand, but the issue is I feel like I have feelings for him. I want to tell him & ask if he's still interested in me in that way, because I wanted to start spending time with him again without the arguments. I don't know whether it's hormones, but I miss him a lot right now. Should I tell him how I feel? I mean, if I hadn't called with the news, I'm not sure when or if he would've called again... The thing is I was the one who started the spats... I apologized afterwards; but I realized when we were falling off that we didn't know each other long enough to survive the spats so soon. I was already missing him, but trying to go out with other people; then I find out this, & my thoughts of him came back. But like I said; we had stopped talking for a week..
We were supposed to hook up the other day to talk about this; but he never showed.
Part of me wants to say something to get us close again; because it hasn't been long; but I don't want to be dogged out because he realizes I really, really want him now.

[Depressed in MO]

I think you should focus on what you are going to do about your pregnancy. Don't give up your baby because HE wants you to, if you are going to do it, look into all of your alternatives and decide which is the best way for you.

He did not want you to keep the baby-because he did not want the responsibility and all of the ties that go along with that factor. From the sounds of it, he does not want you either. Also, from the sounds of it, you are better off without him.

So, time to start thinking about the child-not what he wants.
Best of luck...

[SINGLE4]

Hi Kia!
I agree with DM... you need to focus on yourself and the baby! Give him time to let it sink in and contact you! Don't try to contact him as he will run the other way!:eek: He may or may not come around but if he doesn't come around... it is his loss!:o

[talaniman]

Do whatever it takes to give the best for your child whether he is man about it or not. Look out for your health and don't forget the child support.

[chuff]

When a guy says get rid of it, espiceally when he doesn't know you that means he doesn't like you. If he cared anything at all he'd at least ask your feelings on this, but he didn't, he just told you what to do and your now attracked to him. The nice guy in me will never understand.

It's time to figure out for your child what the best future is for him or her. Time to stop thinking about him and time to stop thinking about yourself. The stupid high school games have ended or at least should end. There is a child that didn't ask for any of this that needs either the father to grow some balls or the mother to grow a spine and make a decision here. That decision is to be determined by you since the father is lacking a pair. Will that child have a decent future with one parent. Is there a family out there willing to adopt (the answer is yes), Will a relative be able to help you if you decide to keep it, or is it best to end it now.

I don't know the answer for you but I know that you picked a loser (and I mean a big one too) who doesn't give a damn about you, you care about him, and some how neither of you care about the child.

[Kia]

Well I did not keep the baby. When I look back I think it was the best decision because we did not have a relationship. But I will admit that it taught me to really be more careful( I was pretty carefree & mostly about just having fun) about sleeping with someone. I had 2 abortions before, but this one really hit me hard for some reason. That may seem pretty crazy, but the past two were the type where I was put to sleep, and when I got up the procedure was over. I was also pretty young and I didn't feel anything, and didn't remember what happened so they didn't really affect me like they should have. But this one I felt really guilty and had serously thought about keeping it. It has also made me kind of want a family, BUT, I'm definitely going to wait for the right man, and right situation.

I also just found out that he has a 2 year old, he never told me about. We're not together or anything, but he told me in passing during a recent phone conversation. So that's that.. -)

[chuff]

Good to hear you are doing well, I really like it when we get updates like this. I think you see now this guy was a loser and I'm glad your rid of him. Don't dwell on it, but do learn from it and you'll be better off in the future.