[Tommer]

20 years as mental health therapist, now here I am with my own problem and lost.
I recently changed careers (to my first choice) and love it.

From day one (job in new field, mechanical tech) -- a (new as well) co-worker
Has come across as mentally unstable. Our job takes us on the road (alone) during
The work days, avg. of once a week. The very first day -- he spoke 5 times only,
All derogatory comments. (our stats: he's 25, afro-american, me, 50, white)
After a prolonged period of laughter, I asked if it was something he could tell
Me; his answer : "I was just thinking, i'm glad i'm not old like you"
I asked him why he would say something like that -- "its true". Nothing more.
The rest of the day his 4 other remarks were race/age/intelligence comments on me.
Nothing kind.

The following week, same. Comments more... socio-pathic. While walking across
A bridge, he leaned over my shoulder and whispered "what would your last
thought be if i pushed you over ???" Then goes into the usual fit of laughing.
I've heard that laughter -- with mental patients during the bad days.

My relationship with the other 20 people there has been usual -- some great,
Some just dull work relationships.

The problem I can't solve? He's Joe Normal around the other co-workers and is
Just LOVED. As well as by the boss, who I sounded out and his comment was, "what
a nice guy".

Which is why I brought up the socio-pathic issue. I've dealt with this with
Patients in my last career, the mental case who singles out one individual to
Deal bizarre behaviour on. Initially, at the workplace, he was very interested
In my first career.

Any ideas? I asked my boss today not to partner me with this man any more,
And he gave me a wide-eyed blank look, but agreed if I didn't want to be partnered with him, then I wouldn't be. What a way to start a new career.
I love the job, but can't escape the last career's shadow.

Tommer

[Starman]

There is little else you can do besides what you have done already or seeking employment somewhere else. I imagine he will probably begin easing up after the intitial three month trial period is over and he begins to consider you a regular worker. In any case, I wouldn't converse with him since he will use it as a weapon. But just in case he still manages to assail you verbally, buy one of those very small recorders and next time this fellow verbally harassed you at least you have the evidence to show the boss.

[Illusion]

What a disrespectful person this guy is. He sounds like he is very immature. It was very inappropriate of him to make those comments to you. You have an advantage over him because you are older and know better. If he is that negative, I would keep my distance from him. I would request to not be paired with him again. And I would leave it up to him if he wants to say hello to me. Be polite and try your best to not engage in conversation with him. He obviously has some problems - and that is not your problem.

[Matt3046]

Everyone should have a personal voice recorder for these occasions.
Tape him, get him fired, and maybe the next partner will be better.

[AMAAT35]

20 years as mental health therapist, now here i am with my own problem and lost.
I recently changed careers (to my first choice) and love it.

From day one (job in new field, mechanical tech) -- a (new as well) co-worker
has come across as mentally unstable. Our job takes us on the road (alone) during
the work days, avg. of once a week. The very first day -- he spoke 5 times only,
all derogatory comments. (our stats: he's 25, afro-american, me, 50, white)
After a prolonged period of laughter, i asked if it was something he could tell
me; his answer : "I was just thinking, i'm glad i'm not old like you"
I asked him why he would say something like that -- "its true". Nothing more.
The rest of the day his 4 other remarks were race/age/intelligence comments on me.
Nothing kind.

The following week, same. Comments more .... socio-pathic. While walking across
a bridge, he leaned over my shoulder and whispered "what would your last
thought be if i pushed you over ???" Then goes into the usual fit of laughing.
I've heard that laughter -- with mental patients during the bad days.

My relationship with the other 20 people there has been usual -- some great,
some just dull work relationships.

The problem i can't solve? He's Joe Normal around the other co-workers and is
just LOVED. As well as by the boss, who i sounded out and his comment was, "what
a nice guy".

Which is why i brought up the socio-pathic issue. I've dealt with this with
patients in my last career, the mental case who singles out one individual to
deal bizarre behaviour on. Initially, at the workplace, he was very interested
in my first career.

Any ideas? I asked my boss today not to partner me with this man any more,
and he gave me a wide-eyed blank look, but agreed if i didn't want to be partnered with him, then i wouldn't be. What a way to start a new career.
I love the job, but can't escape the last career's shadow.

Tommer

I was wondering how this situation ended.. my first thought as I read about what you were saying was that the man must have been very threatened by you as being a therapist for so long and he was 'acting out' to see your reaction. My suggestion would be (if you still work there) buy a small voice recorder and record him acting this way towards you so that---you as the new person can have evidence. :)