[4answers]

I know I have already posted about this subject...

But its something in my life, that despite my better judgement and desire I have not been able to come to terms with...

Frustration, anger, tourure and torment... All based around women.

Or lack of success with them... Combined with an inability to accept the emotional deciept of an ex... (Albeit perceived).

I have vented and talked but still cannot deal with all the negative emotions around this... I can only suppress them for so long but this is not healthy... So angry, so full of hate... its not healthy...


Help.

[bleusong52]

So what are you looking for here? It sounds like you like real life one-to-one counseling with a qualified mental health professional.

Your unhealthy feelings, your errant perceptions of women (your words-an inability to accept the emotional deciept of an ex... (Albeit perceived)), the torture and torment all based on women.

Are you so sure it is based on women or rather it be based on your lack of clarity in what you are looking for in a relationship?

You mention a lack of success in dating women. Is that lack of success a mirror of your own lack of success in being emotionally healthy?

When a person is not capable to accept themselves as someone who deserves better, it is not a big wonder to see who that person partners with.

Have you been reading any good books on relationships? Who have you talked to regarding your negative emotions? What are you doing, in a positive manner, for yourself, except brooding? How are you taking care of yourself? Are you maintaining a physically healthy lifestyle? Are you staying away from the opposite sex? Hopefully you are until you can get your feelings and emotions straightened out.

Good luck to you. Please get some professional help.

[positiveparent]

Check the link in my signature, it could help you there are step by step self help exercises on it to help you overcome or deal with many issues you've mentioned.

You've nothing to lose, the self help pages are down towards centre of the list in left hand side column.

They start at Anger Workout

[KBC]

With all the posts you have written in here,all being about being a victim and being unable to cope with the emotions,not accepting life on life's terms,etc.WHY? haven't you sought professional help?

Do you like feeling this way?Is this now a 'normal' feeling to live in this chaos?If so, why would you write about how to change it?

Drama aside,are you willing to change?Are you able to change?Do you want to live a life without all this drama?

First step in doing this is honesty.You have to be honest,with you.Not me,not them,not anyone else,you.

Ok,I see that you hurt.

Next step is being open.Open to others with this new found honesty.Not the things you have been thinking were truths,, the REAL truths.The ones only you know are right.

The last step, willingness to do the things that you have been (a) honest to yourself about,(b) open to others suggestions/opinions and (c) willing to accept the changes required to stop this from continuing.

Short definition of insanity: Doing the same thing over and over,expecting a different result.

How long you want to stay in the 'insanity' is entirely up to you,you can write more and more posts just like this one(and countless others),write back that ,"yeah,I guess I should...", and in another day/week/month,etc. do it all over again.Your history says this.

This is what I was taught by the professionals I saw for more than 12 years, I was in YOUR shoes.. this commentary isn't judging you,it's showing you that YOU ARE NOT ALONE.. and perhaps you should not try to get out of this mind game alone either.Professional help is available anywhere,, sliding scale fees,some free.. I have found help for people in your situation in more countries than you could imagine.

IF... you are going to change and want the help, I suggest the local church first.. if you are against the church for any reason, you can call the psychiatric unit at ANY hospital in your area,they can suggest places for you to go for help, referrals and such.Your medical doctor would have some kind of information as well.

Hope this hit the mark.

KBC

[martinizing2]

Negative outlook at the onset can and will breed negative results.

You have been given some great advice by all that have posted here. Follow any and all you are comfortable with.

It can only help.