[kaka67]

im 15 hes 17 and been going out for him 4 abwt 3 weeks and ive had sex wid him on more than this accasion and he just went out my house tho when im asleep and we had an argument last nyt n he cudnt look at me so think he might of cheeated on me on fridaii but we made up and i fell asleep with his arms around me and woke up with him gone ?

If you think he cheated on you then you have more to worry about then him not answering his phone. Its probably a blessing in disguise.

Your 15. You should be out mucking around with your friends and enjoying life. Not worrying about whether your boyfriend cheated on you.

Do you live at home?

[NeedKarma]

So your parents allow your boyfriend to come and go as he pleases from your bedroom?

[x_josie_cooper_x]

Yeahh I Live At Home And Well I Don't Want To Confront Him About Cheating On me Or Not Just In case He Hasn't And No My Mm Said He Could Stay Over But No1 New That He Had Gone Till I Woke Up This Morning And He Wasn't There But I Fink He The Type Of Person That Will Just Ignore Me And It Won't Bother Him :S

[redhed35]

Perhaps things are not so rosey any more,he may want to finish and is avoiding you.

3 weeks is not a long time to get to know someone and what there really like.

If he has cheated on you,getting yourself checked out for std's has to be high on your list right now,if you did not use protection see a doctor asap, as pregnancy is a fact of having sex even with contraception.

Him not answering the phone is not important,your health is.

Your underage for sex,and depending where you live your 'boyfriend' has committed statutory rape and could face prison and be put on a sex offenders list.

It's a big deal.

I'm not trying to lecture you,just giving you the facts.

Most likely he got what he wanted and is now gone off to do his own thing and does not give a flying monkeys about how your feeling or the emotional damage he has caused.

My advice is to get your health sorted,and make better choices for yourself in future.

[kaka67]

Yeahh I Live At Home And Well I Dont Want To Confront Him About Cheating On me Or Not Just Incase He Hasnt And No My Mm Said He Could Stay Over But No1 New That He Had Gone Till I Woke Up This Morning And He Wasnt There But I Fink He The Type Of Person That Will Just Ignore Me And It Wont Bother Him :S

You should have confronted him about the cheating just in case he has. You have heard of STD's etc?

And if he could wipe you that easily then he's not good enough for you.

Forget him and go chill with your friends. Enjoy life while you still can.

[x_josie_cooper_x]

Yeah I Know About The STI'S And I will Go Family PLanning 2moz And Get Chacked And A Pregnancy Test And Sorry But If I Am Pregnant No Matter What Ill Keep It And He Can't Go To Prison Unless I Tell The Police And That Won't Happen And I Might Be 15 But I Act 18 And That's The Way I Am And I Have Slit My Wrists Fridaii Beacause Of Him And Cryed My Eyes Out 4 Hours On Fridaii + I had to cry Myself asleep ! ITS So Stressful I Don't Know What To Do

[redhed35]

You don't have to report him for the police to press charges,no doubt he has had sex with other under age girls. ( perhaps I'm assuming too much,but from your post it would seem likely)

Could I ask what support you have at home?

Your relationship with your parents?

Who takes care of you?

[x_josie_cooper_x]

Met My Dad When I was 12 And Then He Tried Do Sumit to me When Was 13 ish So Didn't Speak to him For A While But The Police Had No Evidence So Didn't Do nothing And I Live With My Mum But We Are Forever Arguin And Was Kicked Out Last Year So Had 2 Live Wiv A Mate For 3 Months But Back At Home And Hate It

[redhed35]

Things have been rough for you and at 15 you have been through quite a lot.

Wanting someone to love you and wanting someone that will look after you is perfectly normal,but a 17 year old can't give you what you need or want.

Having sex with guy is not love and it won't make him stay or love you.

Having a baby now when your own life is upside down will only make things harder for you,and not fair on a little baby,don't you think so?

As hard as it is now to see that you can change your future,that you can be who ever and whatever you want in life is down to you.

You can travel the world,you can buy your own house and have a happy wonderful life if you want it... but you need to make smart choices now for that to happen.

There is a place you can go where they will teach you how to have a great future... its called school!

I know,at 15 school can be a pain,but I guarantee you,if you listen in class,make an effort at homework,your teachers will see your trying and will want to help you succeed. And you can,if YOU want it.

Having a conversation with your mother about the things you want in life,if you talk to her,tell her about your dad and what happened,ask her to help you succeed,get some councilling.

This guy you slept with last night,does not care about you,he used you for sex,he does not love you,he does not care about you,and that's what you want... yeah?

Set your standard high,your body is yours,not for some guy to use.

Your upset today cause he has not called you,perhaps this is the day where you turn things around,and won't let ANYONE abuse you again.

[x_josie_cooper_x]

I Go To College,
He Does Care About Me He Aked Me If he Gets His Own Place Wud I Move In With Him Because He Knows How Much Me And My Mum Argue And If I Was Pregnant It Will Kill Me More To Not Have IT Than It Wud 2 Have It.. I Don't Believe In Abortions Are ANything That Gets Rid Of It and Having A Conversation With My Mother Would Be Like trying To Find A Needle In A Hay Stack and I Don't Want Counciling Im Fine I Just Don't Want To Be Messed Around And It Is So Hard To Go Sleep With Sum1 And Then Wake Up To Find Him Gone We Are Meant To Be Bf + Gf And I Have Not Been Abused Well Not Hit Or Anything Like That I Just Want It All To Stop And Want A Normal Life

[redhed35]

What do you think you need to do to make it stop and have a normal life?

What's normal to you?

[x_josie_cooper_x]

I Don't Know

[redhed35]

I Dont Know

You must have some idea of what a normal life is and what it is you want to stop?

What do you think a normal life is?

[Jake2008]

You are 15, and in college?

Somehow that is a hard one to swallow.

Red has given you some very good advice, and probably more than you've had from your own mother. Are you listening at all?

You are heading down a road to disaster. First you have repeated sex, underage, and then say you are going to find out about STD's and birth control- after the fact. You say if you are pregnant, and if you are, you will support a baby how?

You are miserable with your mother, can't go to your father, just who is going to support you, provide for you and a baby, and put a roof over your head. You are legally still a child, and you could be having a child of your own. Why, despite everything, would you choose to have sex without protection. You do know that without protection you can get pregnant right? Do you want to get pregnant? Is this your way of keeping a boyfriend?

And you're worried that you woke up this morning and your boyfriend isn't there? In fact,that was your question. He shouldn't have been there in the first place. If your mother said it was okay for you to go and jump off a cliff, would you?

You didn't ask about your lifestyle, or what you could do to get yourself back on track, or how to improve the relationship you have with your mother, or where would you go to get counselling, or what is involved in raising a child, or even try to figure out why a 17 year old boy would take off after he gets sex. He is an idiot for not using protection, a complete fool to risk bringing a life into this world that he has no means to support.

And yet, something motivates you to go to extreme means to keep this boy. And really all you have is the sex. Are either of you working, and do your incomes meet the minimum requirement to financially be independent, and then to add a baby on top of that?

You can expect to pay out $10,000 on average, for just the first year.

Baby Costs: How Much Does it Cost to Have a Baby, Formula

The cost of birh control for a year is between $15-$50.00 a month, and a shot every three months is about $35.00. Do you earn enough money to pay for even your own birth control? Or is that something that you will have to rely on somebody else for. My point is, if you cannot even afford birth control, how on earth can you afford a baby.

Regardless of the cold hard facts of having unprotected sex, you should not be having sex at all, unless you are emotionally and financially pepared. And, add to that, a mature parter who is employed, hopefully with benefits, and both of you have a stable life- together, that doesn't revolve around having to be 100% reliant upon someone else to provide the basics of life for you.

You are very much 15 years old. You are not 25 or 30, with at least a high school diploma, and money in the bank. You are not independent, nor can you be, you are too young, and you have no skills to support yourself. I presume that your boyfriend still also lives at home, and I doubt that he has any more understanding of the path he is on, than you do. I suspect that both of you put together couldn't buy a box of diapers.

And you're worried about your boyfriend being gone after a night of unprotecte sex, and he isn't answering his 'fone'?

[jmjoseph]

Stop having sex until you are ready to be a parent. And you "go to college"? Why do you capitalize ALL of your words?

Go study. And forget about this guy.

[Cat1864]

Is the person you were asking about in this thread the same one you are asking about in this one?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...do-492177.html

[NeedKarma]

Is the person you were asking about in this thread the same one you are asking about in this one?

https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/teens/...do-492177.html

Whatever college she goes to has very low standards as far as writing skills are concerned.

[eightzeros]

Josie... look a 17 year old is older than you to not to loose his way to home or to his girl friend. So let's not worry about him. He would be fine by himself.

Now, let's worry about you. You are only 15 & you are under stress, you have hurt yourself & have difficulty in making your mother hear you. Here everyone has shown concern about you & have given great advices. Why not listen to them?

I know you have built great feelings for this guy & you are ready to sacrifice everything for him but WAIT... like this you will make each other big time losers... because you two are way to young to talk about moving in together, spending a lifetime together, having babies.. on & on.

If you want the best for both of you in coming years then let yourself grow into a fine lady. There is no need to hurt yourself because you are already in a very hurting situation. You should be the one to protect yourself. You are talking of keeping the baby if you are pregnant but how would you make this baby survive? Because you are yourself a very weak person who can't accept reality & fight it effectively... how will you protect your baby? You have been hurting yourself & crying, how are you going to make any baby survive?

See... first before even thinking of having a baby or moving in with a guy, you need to take care of yourself. Don't you want to go to Princeton? To get your own car? Your very own apartment? Your own pet? Don't you want a life different than your mum had? Don't you want to go to Europe when you grow up? Don't you want to see Aurora in Alaska? I bet you do!

What kind of mum do you want to be? A great one, right? Would you tell your daughter to go after a guy who is himself in a fragile age, to cut her wrists, to ignore if she gets pregnant or not... would you? Of course not!

I know life must be hell at this moment but it won't be the same. You are only 15, life has not even started yet & you have thought of several reasons to cry about. Go slow, enjoy your time to the maximum. Be selfish & learn as much as possible, go find counselling where you are receiving education & ask them to help you get a scholarship & a way to improve your studies.

My suggestion would be to take a big piece of paper & write down "I am a great 15 year old, I deserve the best." & paste it on your dressing table or on your wall & keep looking at it. If thoughts of finding comfort in the arms of a 17 year old creeps into your head, then smack yourself out of it or pinch yourself very hard. You definetely deserve the best like any other 15 year old in this planet.

[YeloDasy]

You need support from a trusting adult. You also need counseling to address your decisions and your cutting. You do not seem like 18, you do seem 15. You are not emotionally ready for a relationship and deserve to only have people in your life who make you happy. Your family is not 100% supportive, so you need to find those out there who make you feel good. This guy may care about you on some level, but that does not mean this relationship is the right thing for you. They can get complicated, and you are not in a place to handle it right now, and you do not need to have these worries or concerns right now.
Go out and be with your friends, have some fun, get to know you, and build yourself esteem. You need these things to make better decisions and deal with your past pain in a healthy way.
I would suggest counseling, you can talk to someone at your school or ask your mom to take you to one.

[x_josie_cooper_x]

My boyfriend told me that he won't be out on thursdaii because he has work from 7 in the morning till 1 the next morning so I said okai then even though he normally only work frm 7 until 4pm. So on yesterdaii I texted him saying wuu2 and he said at work till 1. but then 10 minutes after I saw his mate that I know and he said he was on his way to meet my boyfriend. So I rang my boyfriend and said you chat s**t thought you were at work and he said er er er yh just been dropped of cause of the rain and I said yeah yeah and he put the fone down so I textd him saying wel thanks for letting me know so is it over then and why you put the fone down and he replied "up 2 u dont give a f**k" so I said well you obviously don't care and he said well that's just say that. So I said well is it over and he said I didn't and I said well you just said you don't care weather it over and he said you seem like you want it be over. So I said no I would tell you and I the one trying sort it out so is it over or not ? And he said well going bed talk to you tomoz and I said well I want to know where I stand and he said going bed text u 2moz... and I don't know what to do and it's the weekend and I got a feeling he going cheat on me if we are still together ?