[deebeee]

My husband refuses to take his work boots off when I am not at home.
We live on a farm and he is also a builder, so you can imagine the state of his boots.
I hoover and wash the floors every day and if I catch him wearing his boots inside, he will begrudgingly take them off.
I cam home today and he had been off work all day. I took my shoes off and walked bearfoot through to the lounge. My feet were black within minutes. When I showed him, his response to me was to tell me if I don't like having black feet indoors, I should keep my outdoor shoes on...

He isn't the cleanest of men at the best of times and doesn't clear up after himself. Blue jobs are his and they are outside and pink jobs are mine and that is in the house.

What can I do to get him to remove his boots of his own accord without nagging him?

[smoothy]

Tell him you can either cook dinner or wash the floors of the dirt he dragged in... but not both. And the floors will be clean before you cook.


Either that or don't put out... until he does.

[adam_89]

Tell him to take them off or no supper. Or lock him out of the house until he takes them off.

[redhed35]

If you were messing around with his tools or any of his 'outside ' jobs,would he complain?

I'm betting he would.

You stay out of his work area,and respect his space,and he does ht same for you.

In this case,I'm saying ,what's good for the gander is fair game for the goose.

[Catsmine]

I answered this way on the other thread you posted this question on:

Make a rule - he only wears shoes indoors when he's cooking dinner. Make sure no shoes indoors applies to everybody. Post signs and insist. I am required by law to wear certain types of footwear for my job but I will remove my shoes to enter a home if the owners insist. In agricultural settings such a rule can have health benefits by reducing the exposure of the residents to manure and fertilizer laced soils.

[Wondergirl]

The mother of a farmer's son I dated had installed a bench in the back hall where the husband and kids came in after working on the farm. Their indoor shoes or slippers were kept near the bench, so it was easy to sit down, take off the work boots, store the work boots (that might have to be scraped or cleaned later) on a thick plastic mat, put on the indoor footwear, and go into the kitchen.

Have you made it convenient for him to change shoes when he comes indoors?

[dontknownuthin]

In my household the people who live here come in and put their shoes on and off at the back door. Nobody wears shoes in the house. The exception is my elderly father who struggles to put his shoes on, but even he will not go any further than the tile floor in the kitchen to take off a pair of muddy shoes and he will mop any mess he makes in the process.

You can ask your husband to come in the back door, or leave his boots in the garage. You can get a bench or chair or have a rule or strike or do a lot of different things, but it he's so childish and rude that he won't consider your hard work in maintaining the house, you have a bigger problem than muddy shoes! Does he want you to treat him like a child and come up with consequences and psychology games, or is he a grown man who considers others in his actions? I'd ask him that question.

[Fr_Chuck]

Being on a farm is no excuse, it is just a sign of lack of respect and not having to help clean.

Easy, If he does it, he has to clean and mop floors, and if not, hope the couch sleeps well

[Alty]

I agree with everyone.

Most restaurants have a "No shoes, no shirt, no service" requirement. Make sure he knows that in your house it's "Shoes, muddy floor, no service".

He's being passive aggressive, refusing to comply. Fine. But that doesn't mean that you have to take it. Don't clean the floors, and don't cook until they're clean.

Warn him once that this is the new rule. After that, say nothing, just wait for him to figure it out.

Even my dogs know better then to track mud into the house. They wait patiently at the door for their feet to be wiped. So do my kids.

This man needs to be trained.

Sorry guys. Love you all. Don't throw things. ;)

[jmjoseph]

If they are pull up boots, then there is no excuse. But if they are lace up boots, then it's probably because it's really a pain to get them on and off easily.

I have worn lace up boots for the last 35 years. Working in the woods, you need the ankle support.

If they are lace up:
If he is in and out all day, then get him some extra large slip on rain rubbers, the short ones, for his boots. Get him to use them in the house only, and put a bench or chair by the door for him to use.

You can also get a boot brush/cleaning station for the door step.

If they are pull up:
Ask him to take them off at the door. If he doesn't, stop feeding him. That'll get his attention, I promise.

I'm like him, but I take note of the condition of my boots before I enter my wife's clean house. It usually takes SEX to get them off before it's time.

It IS all about respect. But don't let this matter ruin your marriage. There is a solution.

Good luck.