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splinter18 · Jun 23, 2010, 02:16 PM

Right I'm 18 male an a virgin am I soposed to feel good/Bad about this because guys seem to think its bad but anyway what do you girls think of this ?

Basically I've bin friends with this girl for 3 years we we went out before bt broke up because of not having time to see each other as I was in the Army but recently we have bin very close and we where talking of sex and she doesn't know I'm a virgin yet so I don't know how to tell her. So any help Would be great thanks P.S I trust this girl a lot an vice versa for her if that's any help.

Synnen · Jun 23, 2010, 02:27 PM

First--no text speak. If you are 18 and an adult, you can type in proper English (been instead of "bin" and because instead of "coz").

Second--who the heck CARES if you are a virgin?

Seriously, I honestly don't get why people are so hung up on it. It'll happen when it happens. Telling her sometime before it happens would probably be good, just so that you're both on the same page about things.

Finally--like I always say--if you can't TALK about sex with someone, then you're not comfortable enough to be HAVING sex with that person.

splinter18 · Jun 23, 2010, 02:30 PM

Ok il not use text slang. And thanks for the advice and its not that we can't talk about it , its just I was to embarraessd to tell her but this has made me feel a lot better.

Cat1864 · Jun 23, 2010, 03:45 PM

I think you should have sex with someone you currently have feelings for. Feelings that are stronger than friendship.

I don't think you should have sex because 'guys think it is bad' to be a virgin.

I think no one should feel pressured to do something he/she isn't ready for.

I don't think you are ready for a 'friends with benefits' arrangement which sounds like the direction this relationship is taking.

I think you need to make certain that you are both on the same page. Is she expecting a romantic relationship? Are you? If you met another female tomorrow who you are attracted to, would you give this friend a thought before asking the new person out?

Be sure that you aren't planning (unintentionally) to use the friend to lose your virginity.

Fr_Chuck · Jun 23, 2010, 03:56 PM

First, if you can't talk about sex with someone, you are not ready to "have" sex with them, you need to be able to talk about things you like, feel, what, how , where and why.