[Muggs]

:-[ Hello: I am in a dillemma. A few of my friends went out to celebrate a Birthday. We all went bar hopping & such. Everyone was quite intoxicated. However my dillemma is that I ended up taking a ride home (he was working at the bar & sober) from this cute guy I have been flirting with on & off for months. Things went a bit too far (close to sex but not sex). Normally, I would never have acted this way. I am more shy & reserved. Now I know this will not go anywhere due to the fact of this event that happened (plus he is a huge "player"). My problem is that I know I will have to face him rather soon. I do not know how to react when I do see him or what to even say?! I have a very good reputation & I am really beating myself up over this. I am happy with myself that I didn't let it progress to sex but still & all I am extremely disappointed in myself for getting intoxicated & my actions during this time. I am 27 years old & never did anything this risqué or stupid before. I am so upset with myself & beating myself up over it that I am acting like I have OCD. I am wondering if anyone has any tips on how I can get over this & face the problem when I do have to see him (I am thinking he probably will not even talk to me but that is fine). I am more wondering how to get myself over this incident & move on rather than laying awake obsessing over it. Any insights would be oh so helpful! :'(

[elrp]

Aww, first of all you have nothing to beat yourself up about. It happens to all of us. I've done some silly things when I've been drunnk too, the fact is, when there's a drunk girl - there's always a guy waiting to take advantage.

If you can, try to act like nothing's happened, I know it will be hard though. If he mentions it, just say something like "Ah i was drunk, just a bit of fun", just so he knows you're not giving out any signals.

Don't be ashamed of what you've done, we all make mistakes once in a while. Well done for stopping it before it led to sex, because that would have been awful.

I can't say it enough, don't beat yourself up about it!!

People who know you will know it's out of character so they won't treat you, or think of you, any differently. So don't worry about that.

[Muggs]

Thank you so much elrp for your insights & help. I really appreciate your taking the time to write to me! Thanks again!

[elrp]

Aww you're welcome, if you need any help with anything again feel free to message me :)

I hope everything goes well for you.

Take care

[mtybaldone]

Yeah, I definitely think to need to lighten up on yourself and give yourself a break. Alcohol lowers inhibitions, but it sounds like you would need to drink enough to kill a horse to lower yours. You need to live a little and enjoy life a bit. You didn't do anything wrong!
You've been flirting with the guys, so you obviously liked him, it just took a few drinks to allow yourself to live out your fantasies. Sounds to me like you were having a great time and did what you wanted to do.
He was a gentleman and didn't push you into sex and you got to hook up with a hot guy.

[sweety]

Don't worry no one is perfect hun, at least u were careful enuf not to drift into having sex with an a**hole.

[chaz1797]

Hi,
I just want to tell you that you have not anything wrong and to err is human, just check yourself on other nights out that you don't repeat the last behavier, if he's a gentilman then he will act as always and keep to himself wha happen to himself and not come to any conclusions to the sittuation, if he's a jerk and has been in this perdicarment before who are they going to believe him or you, I say you because a man who brags isn't a man and a lot of people don't believe them, so you have done nothing wrong, and just check yourself when you go out that it doesn't happen again and if it does make it with someone who is in your life and not just a one nighter.

Best of luck and God bless, if you have any other concerns let me know.

Chaz :)

[sanju]

:)
I am happy that you realised that you have made a mistake but here what's your main problem is how to avoid that guy when he again come up.
I think you should act for some days like :
1. Whenever comes to you , you should act like you are in angry mood and does not wants to talk to anyone and should request that guy to leave you alone.
2. OR, you should directly start ignoring him, should not talk properly with him or should insult him again and again , show some hatred for him.

[qtie8411]

Don't worry about it. You didn't sleep with the guy, you had fun with a guy you were interested in. he won't think anything of it when you see him again, especially if you see him at work... he'll be too busy tending bar. You feel bad because you have morals and you did something you feel goes against them. You are only human and we all make mistakes. You didn't get pregnant or commit a crime so you have nothing to worry about. Stop having feelings of guilt and move on!!

[bullet777]

If he makes any comments at all, just laugh it off and let him know that you will never get drunk with him again, because of how close you came.

Trust me, all he's doing is kicking himself for getting you to 'almost' and not closing the deal.

You will always be one of his favorite memories and fantasies.