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When women go through mid-life crisis... everything falls and droops. We kind of go crazy. When men go through a mid-life crisis.. they buy a sports car, get a twenty year old... viagra and a toupee. Not all of them.. My husband was too scared to even try. Must be the iron skillets in my kitchen:D |
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 Originally Posted by KBC
So men need to lash out or change their ways because of this:confused: They can't just cope like normal rational people? IE Women? OK... some women and some men:rolleyes: |
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Originally Posted by KBC
I'm not looking for anything specific, just basic knowledge that I don't know. I do have to go to bed now, late for me since I'm old and still not retired.:D Thank you! |
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Why limit it to men?
I've dated strong, opinioned women for the most part, and my last big love lost spent more time asking those questions than me... I find it just wrong to stereotype in this area... lots of women are "happily married and dreaming of divorce" too... |
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JD, I wish I could help you, but I don't think that I can. You see, I am 48, and have only been married for 11 years. She is five years younger than I, and that is young enough for me. We have two young sons ages 8 and 5, so that in itself keeps me young. I got married at a later age because I didn't want to be one of those guys that would be straying from their marriage in the quest for youth. Or for the quest of youthful booty. I had fun while I was still single. I traveled, I sampled, I drove the fast car. I raised hell BEFORE I settled down. My wife accepts me for what I am, and loves me more for the experience. I may be wrong, but I don't think I'll be going back looking for something that I didn't do. I found a woman that I feel that I can grow old with. She's not perfect, but she's perfect for ME. The greatest job that I'll ever have is the one that I am proudest to admit to having now. A husband and father. My hair is turning gray, and turning loose. And I'm OK with that. So, when my wife turns 50 I won't be trading her in for two 25's. |
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You just have to be careful, and watch for signs.
For instance, if your husband suddenly seems six foot, puffed up and bullet proof, then buys a Harley, and then a helmet with a ponytail already attached, you might want to consider it could be menopause. |
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There have been many studies about the "seven year itch"... most confirm the concept that the same thing that gives us a sense of comfort... familiarity... can also lead to discontent and rethinking and wondering...
One study showed that couples who had experienced significant boredom in the relationship early on predicated the same years later... while those who didn't experience it early on... well, it had no statistical relevance to boredom later on.. Which basically means you are more likely to be bored later on and be distracted and unsatisfied... So... Is it good or bad to know this?? On one hand... it really sounds like a bummer for the chances of a happy, long marriage. On the other... it might say "guess what? you are mortal. the things you are feeling are normal-ish"... When I taught at the university, I offered help sessions twice a week. 80% of the people who came were women. I think half of the guys there were there for the women. Women, in my experience, seek out info and ask for help more than men. My professional experience is exactly that. I don't like to generalize. I know the dangers of this. But I do think women tend to talk out their frustrations more... and men, like me, think we can just "work it out"... I love to help. Hate to ask for it. HATE to ask for anything. It isn't an excuse for any bad behavior... but it is how I'm wired. |
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