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    vivrr22's Avatar
    vivrr22 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #1

    Jun 13, 2010, 11:48 PM
    How to convince girl parents for love marriage
    Hi everyone... my name is vivek.. sometimes love makes you feel happy.. it makes your life miserable when d person with whom you love much is leaving you completely.. m an engineer not settled in life yet.. not settled in the sense not in permanent job yet .some how earning something for daily expense.one and half year bak I started loving a gal.her name is kavitha.very descent simple smiley good lokking gal.u ll never find her being dull.very energetic.wonder frm where she get all these energy.. after becoming very close I proposed her one day.. inspite of knowing she had rejected many proposals lik this previously only bcoz of the reason der parents will never agree for love marriage still I proposed her.. but she accepted me.. I still wonder what made her accepting me.after I fell in love wit her I started meeting her everyday.used to be with her all time.she is also a software engineer.. every Saturday I used to spend my entire time with her.but one day
    She told me her mom has become very sensitive nowadays.. if at all she come to know that her daughter is in love wit someone she ll not be alive for sure and all.. so better v split up.. its impossible to get married.. but I coulnt tak up that.. I said k.. u be with me as long as you can den you leave me.. now that time has come... m in such a position whre I'm not able to go home without meeting her every evening.. not able to go to my office without seeing her in the morning.. every satuday reminds me kavitha.. m feeling alone now.. she was very nice to me.. I treat her lik my mom sometime.. she even fed me food and all other day.. now she is leaving me only bcoz she doesn't want to hurt her mom or dad or her closed ones.. she just don't want to lose der belief what dey are having on der daughter.she fainted off in office and went off to unconscious for two hours last evening after she kept on thinking about what I ll do after she leav me. M feeling lik crying as m typing this.. what ll I do now ?tel you what I don't even want to imagine my life after 6 months as she is leaving me after d time which she had given me.now also m telling you people.. don't love someone beyond d limit.. dont treat dem lik dey are everything in your life.. since it hurts you more dan anything else when dey leav u.. u don't even consider your parents for d sake of that person.but still I say loving kavitha is the best thing happened in my life.. I love her so much.love her lik anything.. I love her truly madly.. still she is leaving me.. what ll I do now? Shall I committ for suicide? But I don't want to cheat my parents by doing it so.. den shall I be lik this only through out my life.. no.. bcoz I used to go mad.. used to become upset when I was not able to meet my kavitha single day.. give me a solution frm that I can get my kavitha without hurting parents.plzzz. Can anybody help me in this.. can anybody?. I treat you as my god if anybody helps me.. I not able to be alive nor die offf.. somebody give me a solution
    Jake2008's Avatar
    Jake2008 Posts: 6,721, Reputation: 3460
    Emotional Health Expert
     
    #2

    Jun 14, 2010, 01:46 AM
    Vivrr,

    No matter what the circumstances are, whether in your case it is parental influence, or other cases where one falls out of love with the other, or things don't work out for a million reasons, it will hurt, and deeply, when you lose someone you love.

    It is a loss, and as such, part of being human. We have all gone through the loss of a loved one in one way or the other, and really only time will heal your broken heart.

    It is difficult to accept, but you must accept it. It really isn't an option, you must cope with this loss, work through it, and live your life.

    Try to put into words how you are feeling by writing them out. You may feel disbelief, anger, resentment, confusion, etc. as time goes on. But these are some of the emotions you need to express in order to live through this.

    Not only will you live through this, but you will be so much stronger the next time love comes your way, and it will. To not allow yourself to heal, will mean bringing the memory and shadow of kavitha into any new relationship, and that will hold you back.

    While you may feel this is the end of the world today, tomorrow and the days to come will lift that dark cloud, and you'll begin to feel like yourself again.
    hudaa11's Avatar
    hudaa11 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #3

    Jul 21, 2010, 11:26 PM
    Hi vivek, my name is Hudaa. I really hope you are reading this, first of all its been more than a month since you've posted this and I wonder if you've been able to come up with a solution to somehow convince Kavitha's parents.

    After reading your post I just can't stop crying and I had to write to you... :(... Ive been upset with my life too and been suicidal... but I hope you read this and reply me because I really want to know if you and Kavitha are doing fine. You mentioned things like... "commiting sucide" "you and her splitting" "6 months time"... it all must be so hard for you but please hopefully you have read what "Jake2008" has written for you just in case. But I seriously will pray for you two and hope you and kavitha end up together! :D... and if you could please reply me on my e-mail letting me know you both are fine, I may be able to help and you can for sure share your current situation with me...

    I know I'am some random stranger getting so worried about you and your love Kavitha, but honestly I read a bunch of love-fail/success stories on the web today, BUT AFTER READING YOURs... I just had to write something :)

    mY E-MAIL ID: >removed<... take care of yourself and your loved ones.
    BYE FOR NOW <3 huda <3
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #4

    Jul 22, 2010, 07:56 AM
    Quote Originally Posted by hudaa11 View Post
    Hi vivek, my name is Hudaa. I really hope you are reading this, first of all its been more than a month since you've posted this and I wonder if you've been able to come up with a solution to somehow convince Kavitha's parents.

    After reading your post I just can't stop crying and I had to write to you... :(... Ive been upset with my life too and been suicidal... but i jus hope you read this and reply me because I really want to know if you and Kavitha are doing fine. You mentioned things like... "commiting sucide" "you and her splitting" "6 months time" ... it all must be so hard for you but please hopefully you have read what "Jake2008" has written for you just incase. But I seriously will pray for you two and hope you and kavitha end up together! :D ... and if you could please reply me on my e-mail letting me know you both are fine, I may be able to help and you can for sure share your current situation with me...

    I know I'am some random stranger getting so worried about you and your love Kavitha, but honestly I read a bunch of love-fail/success stories on the web today, BUT AFTER READING YOURs... i just had to write something :)

    mY E-MAIL ID: >removed< ... take care of yourself and your loved ones.
    BYE FOR NOW <3 huda <3
    Hudda.. You are not allowed to give personal information on this site. You are not allowed to request personal imformation on this site. Sorry for your situation.
    hudaa11's Avatar
    hudaa11 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #5

    Jul 22, 2010, 07:28 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    Hudda ..You are not allowed to give personal information on this site. You are not allowed to request personal imformation on this site. Sorry for your situation.

    ... Hi "Kitkat22"... im extremely sorry for posting my e-mail id when I wasn't allowed to do so, actually I just joined this place last night when I read the Post above - by vivrr... I don't why I felt the need to write to this person and I tried to find their contact info and when I couldn't get any, I thought I would paste my id so he could contact me... but anywayz Im sorry again for unknowingly breaking the rule. Thank you for letting me know... and if you could please tell me if there is another way of contacting members of this website other than posting replies like this which is public. Okay then I see your online right now hope you reply and so does 'vivek'... buh byee, Hudaa :)
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #6

    Jul 22, 2010, 07:33 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by hudaa11 View Post
    ... Hi "Kitkat22" ...im extremely sorry for posting my e-mail id when i wasnt allowed to do so, actually I just joined this place last night when I read the Post above - by vivrr... I dont why I jus felt the need to write to this person and I tried to find their contact info and when I couldnt get any, I thought I would paste my id so he could contact me... but anywayz Im sorry again for unknowingly breaking the rule. thankyou for letting me know... and if you could please tell me if ther is another way of contacting members of this website other than posting replies like this which is public. okay then I see your online right now hope you reply back and so does 'vivek' ... buh byee, Hudaa :)
    No there isn't except by posting here and as I said no personal info is allowed i.e. real names and addresses... no phone numbers or email addresses. This thread is more than a month old. She hasn't responded to any of the answers and advice.
    hudaa11's Avatar
    hudaa11 Posts: 3, Reputation: 1
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    #7

    Jul 22, 2010, 07:47 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by Kitkat22 View Post
    No there isn't except by posting here and as I said no personal info is allowed i.e. real names and addresses...no phone numbers or email addresses. This thread is more than a month old. She hasn't responded to any of the answers and advice.
    K thankz again, and yes I do what personal information means, the only thing I meantioned real - was my e-mail tat youv erased :) so thankx... n like I said bfor the only reason I joined this site was because I wanted to know what happened with Vivek who posted this thread more than a month ago... but I guess I won't be getting any replies from him.

    Will you be able to tell me how to cancle my registration?. I don't want to get anymore e-mails from here.

    Hudaa.
    Kitkat22's Avatar
    Kitkat22 Posts: 6,302, Reputation: 1191
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    #8

    Jul 22, 2010, 07:52 PM
    Quote Originally Posted by hudaa11 View Post
    K thankz again, and yes I do what personal information means, the only thing i meantioned real - was my e-mail tat youv erased :) so thankx... n like i said bfor the only reason i joined this site was because I wanted to know what happend with Vivek who posted this thread more than a month ago... but i guess I wont be getting any replies from him.

    Will you be able to tell me how to cancle my registration?? ... I dont want to get anymore e-mails from here.

    Hudaa.
    You can't unsubsribe. Once you have posted anything it remains. Go to Forum Help and they can tell you that. Just block your email.


    Something one of the mods suggested for someone who wants off the site.

    Change your e-mail and password to something random and log off and then your account here is closed.
    sonukapoor's Avatar
    sonukapoor Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #9

    Sep 29, 2011, 03:10 AM
    Hi , I just wanted to tell try to find soloution to convience her parents .try to think which thing influclence her parents.. nothing is impossible dear keep it up.. god bless you
    sunny1436's Avatar
    sunny1436 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #10

    Nov 7, 2011, 03:25 AM
    Hi all/vivek...

    Now I am in same situation... we both are from different caste.Now my love said,"my parents wont accept,
    so plz go away from me". I can't digest this.her name supraja. Very cute and innocent.but I am not able to convince her parents. I am not happy as earlier,I don't know what to do,I am dying inside... help me please.. any solution? /

    My email id... [email protected]
    vikas7411's Avatar
    vikas7411 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #11

    Jan 29, 2012, 04:15 AM
    Everyone's in the same situatuion here... even I'm in same situation... mine is even worse... I m christian and the girl is hindu(reddy)and I'm 21years old... she is 24. I know v r perfect for each other... but life is unfair just have to accept the way it is... it kills me inside when I think my love is no more left it has come to end... v understand each other very well and you v love each other very much... but here in india v have to many caste feelings and no one realisez that heart and feelings are common in everyone... religion is the main reason for lost love... I m broken down. I will tell you one thing vivek write down your feelings in diary. You will feel better. Give love to someone who is in need. Like visit some orphanage or old aged house and give love to them they will never break your heart... it very tuf to convince girls parents as they think loving is a wrong thing to do... and they will lose their respect in their community they will never undrstd the feelings... the are blindfolded by the culture and caste thing... they will not understnd love... believe me brother its very hard for me to be alone too... but this is life and its tuf and very unfair... I know it and you also know it nw.
    -Vikas here
    My girfriends name is suma. I mentioned I'm a christian rite don't be confused by name... my mom is christian my dad converted into christian for mom... so I'm christian.
    Life is unfair.
    shyam1981's Avatar
    shyam1981 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #12

    Mar 28, 2012, 10:32 PM
    Hi Vivek, I understand your situation. First of all I advice you that if you really love to her then you should not let her go. You should not be negative. You are surrendering yourself without fighting. This is not good. Firstly, you try to make your girlfriend ready for with you whether her parent agrees or not Since this is your life. Try all your effort, take help of your and her friends who can encourage her to do court-marriage with you. And if you get chance for this just go for court marriage and after that try to convince her parent. If they agrees then OK other wise inform them that you are already married.
    But friend remember, If you love her 100% then now this is the time love her 200%. Show her so extreme love, care, and affection with her. Create this type of situation for her that she can live without you and she can't think life without you. You must have to be like breath for her. Then I am sure she will also fight for you. Brother remember "You are defeated only when you feel that you defeated, and if you do not feel like that the you are real warrior".
    Don't think to do suicide and never let her go. Do step by step thinks as follows:


    First contact her again and meet and start things again:

    1. Show and give her so extreme love care and affection ever before.
    2. Make her emotionally so attached. Show her that you are nothing without her and what ever you are due to her.
    3. Talk with her more and more and grow a extreme feeling for you.
    4. Put this type of situation for her so that she become crazy for you like puppet.
    5. If she says for breakup don't argue with her, immediately change topic and discuss your happy future with her.
    6. Among all of the above things also involve your friend and her friends who can encourage her.
    7. Introduce her and give example of happy couple who had love marriages.
    8. If all the above thinks is completed then don't loose chance convince her for court marriage and go for that. Now she is yours.
    Good luck.

    Sowmiya0620's Avatar
    Sowmiya0620 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #13

    Apr 20, 2012, 12:14 AM
    Dear Vivek,

    I share the same boat with you, from past five years I have been into madly love with someone and by god's grace I married him, I too respected my family , especially my mom. My mom has underwent 13 operations till now. I was her priced possession, But sometimes they just cannot see anything beyond their children's happiness and in Indian parents expect a lot from their kids. So I went out and did register marriage. But You will have to win your girl's confidence first. I even managed to convince boys parents. If she really loves you she would come back when you explain her my story. If she doesn't she was never yours. I know it is easy for me to say. But time heals everything.

    Well Wisher
    dark angel23's Avatar
    dark angel23 Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #14

    May 11, 2012, 09:55 AM
    This is dark angel

    All you guys just listen one thing,when your love is true no bull can separate you from it.ok... and have hope... try to act cunning at this time... know what is actually the bride's or girls parent requirement.. if you have time try to achiecve it or if you don't have time ask for the time... convince there parents that only you can nourish her happiness to utmost... say her parents that you can console her like her when she feels bad about something and can stand by to any situation with her... tell that u will look after her like a princess... also tell that by marrying her to other guy it will make her more upset and doesn't make her happier... question there parents that is this is the sadness you want to give to your daughter for rest of her life...

    ... and one last thing tell that no one can love her like your heart which love her still... all the best guys
    ravijain's Avatar
    ravijain Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #15

    Jul 15, 2012, 06:25 AM
    " life is love .; love is divine and pure . How do we define love ? Is it emotional ! Senstitve ! Hardcore ! Physical! Mental! what is love all about ?

    Love is just and infactution ! Just think your life before love and after love !

    Before love.. life was clear respectfull and youthfull . Life was in the shelter of parents !
    Parents are those magical people that set your life! Can you expect.. striving behind you until you grow up ! Looking after your every wish come true , forgetting all there expectations happiness and emotions . Just for that little cheer and smile on your face ! How can someone just hurt their devotion towards you ! Is it that our parents have seen the world.. so they are against love.. or is it just the culture , society and the religion that acts asa barrier to every loved ones life !
    This question arrives in every loved ones life ! Truth is bitter .
    Understanding your loved ones is diffcullt for everyone inthissituation ofselecting
    Either your parents or loved one..
    Can someone sacrifce parents for their devotion for love to move into a better future ! Or sacrfice your love for parents to see the better future ?
    This question should be above all other problems before taking any step !
    Only a winner doesn't run!! Always remember ! Build faith in your partner !hers decision is also difficult to say a no for this relation .

    Love only survivies when its divine andabove the world ! Allother attempts are just
    Fake only toprove our ego point
    ajasharm's Avatar
    ajasharm Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #16

    Sep 17, 2012, 11:35 PM
    Guys , One more name (Mine Ajay) today entered in the SAD story of Love, I guess.

    My "Akankasha" very cute (She is from Kanpur and I am from Jammu). We worked togather for some time and then I joined some other IT company. After leaving her I realize she is one of the most lovable girl. And finally I proposed her for marriage and she agreed. We are in love from past 9 months.

    Now the condition is Her family is not agreeing at all... (Caste Issue , Horescope matching issue and above all IZZAT Issue).. .

    She is ready to do the Court Marriage but I am getting afraid of doing this. I am thinking of Her family IZZAT and mine big family IZZAT. I have seen some cases where girl fell with boy and within few months the girls Father , Mother died because they were not able to bear the IZZAT issue.


    These Days many proposal are coming for her and now I have to decide whether I should go and do the court marriage with her or not...

    Any experieced /Good advice if you can suggest me , you are welcome..
    dimag's Avatar
    dimag Posts: 1, Reputation: 1
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    #17

    Dec 25, 2012, 08:59 PM
    If u want to get what you want sometimes you just gota go and take it, if you don't want to be rude then do something that will prove that you are the man for her and that you can take care of her, even if it means kneeling outside her home for months.
    Im in the same situation brothers I need a solution too but solution or no solution I'm still going to try and try and try everything that I think will work and never give up because I believe in our love, and I believe that I can do it! Guys this phrase in life is where you show your true guts \m/!
    naveen1988's Avatar
    naveen1988 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
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    #18

    May 1, 2013, 11:15 PM
    Hi all...

    Now I am in same situation... we both are from different caste. Nw my lover said that first I ned convince her family members den she will accpt itseems I don't what to do hw to speak to her family members if you can't convince please go away from me". I can't digest this.her name san______. Very cute and innocent gal. I am not happy as earlier,I don't know what to do,I am dying inside... help me please.. any solution? /
    naveen1988's Avatar
    naveen1988 Posts: 2, Reputation: 1
    New Member
     
    #19

    May 1, 2013, 11:18 PM
    Hi all...

    Now I am in same situation... we both are from different caste. Nw my lover said that first I ned convince her family members den she will accpt itseems I don't what to do hw to speak to her family members " she told me if u can't convince plz go away from me". I can't digest this.her name san______. Very cute and innocent gal. I am not happy as earlier,I don't know what to do,I am dying inside... help me please.. any solution? /

    It's nt very hard to sacrifice everything for someone..!

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