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New Member
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Jun 7, 2010, 09:21 AM
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I am madly in love with my husband's best friend and I have told him how I feel.
I am madly in love with my husband's best friend,I even told him how I feel and he kissed me but I am afraid of the results.What do I do
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Junior Member
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Jun 7, 2010, 09:27 AM
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Wait, who did you tell how you felt? Your husband or the best friend?
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Ultra Member
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Jun 7, 2010, 09:47 AM
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Stop now before anything else happens.
Ask yourself what is missing from your marriage that is causing you to seek it elsewhere.
Be honest with your spouse,as hard as it is going to be.
You have cheated,you may not have had sex,but you still cheated,the only way forward and to resolve the issues in your marriage is to get everything out in the open.
Consider marriage councilling,and leave your husbands friend alone,you have both being disloyal,and betrayed your husband.
Many marriages have survived through hard times,but you have to want it to work.
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Dating & Teen Expert
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Jun 7, 2010, 11:04 AM
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You leave your husbands "best friend" alone. Then you have some communication with your husband. There must be something going on or not going on at home to lead you to someone else.
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Family & People Expert
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Jun 7, 2010, 11:07 AM
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Sounds to me like the problem isn't that you're in love with your husband's best friend. It sounds more like you have problems with your husband.
Why are your eyes wandering around? If it's not your husband's best friend, it will probably be another man.
You should be spending your energy trying to repair your marriage. If the marriage can't be fixed, then maybe it's better to get a divorce, but you shouldn't be setting up for a future rebound now.
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Emotional Health Expert
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Jun 7, 2010, 09:27 PM
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How exactly did you fall 'in love' with your husband's best friend? At what point did you cross the line, and why couldn't you stop yourself.
Your husband deserves both a more loyal best friend, and he also deserves a wife who doesn't fall in love with said friend.
That you think you are in love, and find it so easy to betray your husband, what has happened to the marriage vows. What has happened to your dignity, and what makes you think that because you think you are in love, that it is okay to cheat.
Is your husband's best friend married?
Do you and your husband have children? How long have you been married, and have you ever cheated before?
If your goal is to do the honourable thing, and tell your husband what you've done, he may or may not forgive you. But, that is a consequence to your actions.
If you carry on a relationship with another man while you are married, you deserve everything you get, which will likely be disappointment when the infatuation wears off.
I don't know why you need to ask what to do. You've already done it.
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Pets Expert
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Jun 7, 2010, 10:27 PM
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Do the words "Til death do us part" mean anything to you?
Also, if this guy kissed you, he's not your husbands friend, not at all. Neither of you are.
You got married. You made a commitment. Keep you pants on, go home, and build a life with the man you married, not his so called friend.
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Ultra Member
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Jun 7, 2010, 11:15 PM
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Originally Posted by girliem
i am madly in love with my husband's best friend
I think you'll find it's called Lust , and it doesn't last forever
Originally Posted by girliem
I even told him how i feel and he kissed me
Geez , he sounds like a real good friend to your Husband :rolleyes:
Originally Posted by girliem
but i am afraid of the results.
I would be too , 1st you'll lose your Husband, then his former friend will probably use you , and when it's all over you'll have lost everything , including your reputation.
Originally Posted by girliem
What do i do
You honour your vows to your Husband and leave his friends (and anyone else for that matter) alone and concentrate on making your marriage work , if you aren't in Love with your Husband at least have the decency to end it first and give each other time to heal before entering into another Relationship.
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Business Expert
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Jun 7, 2010, 11:40 PM
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Once you have 'crossed the line' and cheat on you mate in reality you have cheated yourself. There is also something called honor. And that is something that should be valued. A long time ago a wise person told me that you will have many temptations we all do but "if you don't stand for something, you will fall for everything." When you dishonor your vows you dishonor yourself.
And Friendforu178 is correct decency is important in our lives. This sort of action on your part only shows that you have given in to a selfish temptation not caring who it may hurt. If you continue this sort of action you will lose any honor you may have left and hurt many that are involved including yourself.
The 'joy and excitement' of the moment will not stand the test of time believe me. Even if this progresses to some sort of 'relationship' with your husband's 'best friend' someday he will ask himself "if she left him for me....when will she leave me for the next adventure?"
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Expert
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Jun 10, 2010, 08:19 PM
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Why ask strangers what should you do when your husband can tell you better than we can. Ask him!
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Uber Member
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Jun 10, 2010, 09:01 PM
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Too late now. I hope your husbands "best friend" at least has enough sense to leave you alone.
Leave the "best friend " to his own devices and start working on your marriage.
Is this "best friend" married? You need to sit down and think of what you have done and what it could lead to.
I'm thinking if your husband finds out he'll want neither of you.
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New Member
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Jun 24, 2010, 05:26 PM
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'But love is blind and lovers cannot see. The pretty follies that themselves commit; For if they could, Cupid himself would blush."Don't judge her harsly, she is just in love, but girl, what you need to do is search your soul for the answer to your problem. You need to look for a quite place and think like you've never done before in your life.If you still love your husband and he is good to you then work it out but if you don't love him anymore then break it up first before you go to this guy whom you think you are in love with.I said think , not feel, you noticed.He probably have all the attributes your husband is lacking, right? He probably also say all the right words, right? he's a player.If you can't think then write it down, all the pros and cons. Pray really hard too.Try this too, stay away from the best friend for six months, no calls , no visits ,no party, then after six months re=evaluate yourself, OK? Good luck and don't cross that line any further than what you've done already.If that guy is for you, he will wait for a while until you are able to sort it out.
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Uber Member
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Jun 24, 2010, 07:17 PM
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Originally Posted by cebu5760
'But love is blind and lovers cannot see. The pretty follies that themselves commit; For if they could, Cupid himself would blush."Don't judge her harsly, she is just in love, but girl, what you need to do is search your soul for the answer to your problem. You need to look for a quite place and think like you've never done before in your life.If you still love your husband and he is good to you then work it out but if you don't love him anymore then break it up first before you go to this guy whom you think you are in love with.I said think , not feel, you noticed.He probably have all the attributes your husband is lacking, right? he probably also say all the right words, right?,he's a player.If you can't think then write it down, all the pros and cons. Pray really hard too.Try this too, stay away from the bestfriend for six months, no calls , no visits ,no party, then after six months re=evaluate yourself, ok? good luck and don't cross that line any further than what you've done already.If that guy is for you, he will wait for a while until you are able to sort it out.
Leave the other guy alone!
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