[per-ty]

Hi, I'm a 26-year-old guy, with a very confused sexual situation, and I need your help for what follows:
Well, I have always felt attracted to good-looking males and females.
- About guys: I often have gay fantasies.
I have a fetish for men's underwear.
I rarely do enjoy sex with them.
I get erection quite easily, sometimes even over the phone.


-About females: I feel much connected to them, emotionally.
(while sexually, the same as with men. Once I'm stiff enough I perform
The same on a man or woman.)
I tend to get erect with more difficulty with girls, usually after having
Gotten oral.
(I get aroused quite easily over naked women- well, I sometimes watch
Porn).

The point is that I don't know what to do with a colleague of mine (girl); I love her so much, but I'm afraid to say anything to her due to my arousal (I don't have a hard-on when close to her). Is this normal, after all?
If I start a relationship with her in the future, will my situation improve sexually (so far, we haven't touched each other yet)?

Please, tell me what I should do.

[Larken85]

This is an interesting one. It sounds sort of like you sexually favor men but emotionally women... When I am attracted to a women (I am strait) I am attracted and connected in both ways to them. I do not share the same connection nor do I have any attraction towards men. So to hear that you have a mixture of attraction and connection strikes me as odd.

Almost dirty... Not saying being homosexual or bi is dirty in anyway because it is just your nature preference. What I am saying is that you associate men with sexual fantasy, and it doesn't seem much like that about women.

Women often have much better relationships (friendships or connection) with other women. I think this is due to women being much more open and honest creatures. I personally have several female friends and only one real male friend. Maybe 2. My point is women are much much easier to connect to.

So to desifer whether you are gay, bi, or strait. Too hard to do. Only you can truly know this. However I think you could pretty easily rule out being strait. If you have had sex with a male and were able to do it, you are far too attracted to men to be strait.

A males sexual stimulations is really involved a lot with what you see visually and mentally. You see yourself with a man and it gets you hot. You see yourself with a woman and that gets you kind of hot. I would say you are one the gay side of bi in my opinion however that is an opinion and like I said only you can discover your own sexuality.

Hope you find yourself

[hheath541]

We can't know your sexual orientation. It can be hard enough to figure out for yourself. You may never be able to put a label on it that feels right to you. That's OK, too. Labels are constricting and limiting and rarely fit comfortably. The label isn't important. The only important thing is being happy with who you are.

As for this girl; why not just keep it as friends, at least for now? It's easy to mistake a close, intense friendship with romantic feelings. Keep it at friends for now. If something more develops later, then it develops. Why worry about it until it happens? It may very well be that your feelings, at this point in time, are strictly platonic. It may also be that your brain is having a hard time reconciling your view of her as a friend with your view of her as a woman, making arousal difficult or impossible.

[per-ty]

Thank you all guys!

[talaniman]

Seems you lust after both sexes, so I won't give you a title, but will give you advice, make sure you know the person you lust after, and are comfortable enough with them to be honest. There is no hurry, and it may save a lot of heartache later, for you, and them.