[chocodrip]

I am twenty three years old and I have been married for the past two and a half years. This might sound really silly but it bothers me. Ever since I was young I was always interested in doing all house hold chores but not cooking. When I got married we lived as a joint family and so we had a cook, last year my mother in law went to London to stay with her daughter, so it was just my hubby, my father in law and I. I decided that I would learn to cook and did just that. I became such an expert at it that I have even cooked for twenty people. There's this elaborate and favourite recipe called mutton biriyani, it is tedious to do it but every one requests to make it often. Every one who's eaten it has agreed that it is the best they've eaten outside a restaurant, except my husband. He's insits that his mother's biriyani tastes better, when I know it does not and all my relatives who has tasted both of our cooking agrees mine is better.

I am not saying that I am a better cook than her, it's just that hers taste like tomato rice with mutton in it. This may be childish but why can't my hubby agree that I cook this recipe better. I have decided never to cook this again, how should I make him understand that he's hurting me every time he shakes his head and says "not bad, but my ma's biriyani is better"

[NeedKarma]

You're not in a competition. It should be no contest that a person likes their family's comfort food. It's what they grew up on, years and years before meeting you. Make it like his mother does if you like. I do most of the cooking at my place (I'm a guy BTW) and my wife has a slap-together cookbook that her mom threw together. I often pick recipes from there.

[Catsmine]

Since it's such a chore to make and your man likes mommy's better, either don't fix it or send him to mommy when you do make it. After all, you wouldn't want to force him to eat something he didn't like. A little thing like going to London if he wants to eat shouldn't bother him.

Yes I'm being sarcastic. I would recommend that you simply decline others' requests to make it because he doesn't care for yours.

[Devorameira]

Catsmine is right. IF the rest of the family requests your mutton biriyani, just tell them that you'll leave that dish to your mother-in-law because your husband prefers hers... then just make something else that is easier to make.

I'm sure he's not trying to hurt your feelings - He probably is just used to the way his mom makes it. :)

[QLP]

There's just no absolutes when it comes to personal preferences with food. I mean I love my scrambled eggs like rubber - I know that's not how they are supposed to be made but that's how I like them so that's how I eat them. Your cooking may be technically better and preferred by most people but your hubby has a thing for his mom's and I doubt that will change.

Tell him he is allowed to say he prefers his mum's but not that it is better, since you can't expect him to lie but he is making an unfair judement with his wording. Or better still he should just thank you and appreciate the dish you make without making comparisons. Are you sure he isn't saying it to deliberately wind you up a bit?

Make it when you want to but not because you feel pressed into it and don't worry about trying to compete with the ma in law. Remember you can't please everyone all the time, so stop trying to.

[Gemini54]

Oh for heaven's sake!

Get your ego out of it and just agree with him that his mother's tastes better!

Don't you understand? It's his mother's food and that's what he was brought up with, it reminds him of his family and his childhood.

It's not a competition with your MIL.. . stop behaving so peevishly, and start being an adult.

[JoeCanada76]

Your being childish.

Each of us have different tastes. You need to remember his ma, cooked for him for years before you even came into the picture.

Maybe he really truly likes the way his mom makes it better. Prefers the mothers touch.

Your not in a competition here, okay, You need to chill out and who cares if your husband does not like yours as much as his mothers.

You need to understand that yes this is silly on your part, what else can I say.

[Jake2008]

If that is the only gripe you have with your husband, consider yourself lucky that he's not having pork and beans down at the local pub with an exotic dancer.

[Enigma1999]

Hello C,

If this is the only problem you have that keeps you up at night, then I want your problems and you can have mine... :)

Only kidding! I think perhaps you are making a bigger deal out of this then it should be. First off, everyone has already told you that your cooking is great! So what if he thinks his Mothers is better. Instead of making this a negative, turn into a positive. Learn more on how to prepare the meal. Don't let it bother you so much.

[chocodrip]

Thank you for taking your time to reply.