[arciea]

I'm bad in sentece construction.I need a nice introduction, catchy one for my davida salon and spa.One friend commented on my site that I have a bad grammar.And I couldn't figure out which one in my sentences.I need a good clientele impression .So please help.Mt site is http./davidasalonspa.com

[hkstroud]

Only the first letter, not the first word of a sentence is capitalized. Learn to use spell check. The word "I" is always capitalized. There are two spaces between the end of one sentence and the beginning of another.

Unless you are directing your services toward teenagers, drop the teenage slang "hang out".

An exclamation mark or exclamation point (!) is a punctuation mark usually used after an interjection or exclamation to indicate strong feelings or high volume. It emphasizes one thing over the other. Everything can't be the most important.

Take what's offered below as a starting point in revising your ad. Think about what are the most important things you want to say. Say too much and the important things get lost in the clutter.